Luminous Emptiness - a Mahamudra Blog

One By One as They Occurred - Anupada Sutta MN#111

2011-01-30T10:07:00.005Z

(Taken from the "Mahjjhima Nikaya: The Middle Length Sayings" by Bhikkhu Bodhi and Bhikkhu Nanamoli, this Sutta covers what was taught by the Buddha concerning the identification of what the student experiences while meditating in each of the Four Jhanas and the four Arupa Jhanas. It is to be read in its entirety out-loud.)

1] Thus have I heard. On one occasion the Blessed One was living at Savatthi in Jeta's Grove, Anathapindika’s Park. There he addressed the bhikkhus thus: "Bhikkhus." - "Venerable, sir," they replied. The Blessed One said this:

2] "Bhikkhus, Sariputta is wise; Sariputta has great wisdom; Sariputta has wide wisdom; Sariputta has joyous wisdom; Sariputta has quick wisdom; Sariputta has keen wisdom; Sariputta has penetrative wisdom. During half a month, bhikkhus, Sariputta gained insight into states one by one as they occurred. Now Sariputta’ insights into states one by one as they occurred were this:

3] "Here, bhikkhus, quite secluded from sensual pleasures, secluded from unwholesome states, Sariputta entered upon and abided in the first Jhana, which is accompanied by thinking and examining thought, with joy and happiness born of seclusion.

4] "And those states in the first Jhana - the thinking, the examining, the joy, the happiness, and the unification of mind; The contact, feeling, perception, volition and consciousness; the enthusiasm, decision, energy, mindfulness, equanimity, and attention - these states were defined by him one by one as they occurred; known to him those states arose, known they were present, known they disappeared. He understood thus: ‘So indeed, these states, not having been, come into being; having been, they vanish.’ Regarding those states, he abided un-attracted, un-repelled, independent, detached, free, dissociated, with a mind rid of barriers. He understood: ‘There is an escape beyond this,’ and with the cultivation of that attainment, he confirmed that there is.

5] "Again, bhikkhus, with the stilling of thinking and examining thought, Sariputta entered and abided in the second Jhana, which has self-confidence and stillness of mind without thinking and examining thought, with joy and happiness born of unification.

6] "And the states in the second Jhana - the self-confidence, the joy, the happiness, and the unification of mind; the contact, feeling, perception, volition, and consciousness; the enthusiasm, decision, energy, mindfulness, equanimity, and attention - these states were defined by him one by one as they occurred; known to him those states arose, known they were present, known they disappeared. He understood thus: "So indeed, these states, not having been, come into being; having been they vanish." Regarding those states, he abided un-attracted, un-repelled, independent, detached, free, dissociated, with a mind rid of barriers. He understood; ‘There is an escape beyond this’, and with the cultivation of that attainment, he confirmed that there is.

7] "Again, bhikkhus, with the fading away as well of joy, Sariputta abided in equanimity, and mindful, and fully aware, still feeling happiness with his body, he entered upon and abided in the third Jhana, on account of which noble ones announce: ‘He has a pleasant abiding who has equanimity and is mindful’.

8] "And the states in the third Jhana - the equanimity, the happiness, the mindfulness, the full awareness, and the unification of mind; the contact, feeling, perception, volition and consciousness; the enthusiasm, decision, energy, mindfulness, equanimity, and attention - these states were defined by him one by one as they occurred; known to him those states arose, known they were present, known they disappeared. He understood thus: ‘So indeed, these states, not having been, come into being; having been they vanish’. Regarding those states, he abided un-attracted, un-repelled, independent, detached, free, dissociated, with a mind rid of barriers. He understood: ‘There is an escape beyond this’, and with the cultivation of that attainment, he confirmed that there is.

9] "Again, bhikkhus, with the abandoning of pleasure and pain, with the previous disappearance of joy and grief, Sariputta entered upon and abided in the fourth Jhana, which has neither-pleasure-nor-pain and purity of mindfulness due to equanimity.

10] "And the states in the fourth Jhana - the equanimity, the neither-pleasant-nor-painful feeling, the mental unconcern due to tranquility, the purity of mindfulness, and the unification of mind; the contact, feeling, perception, volition and consciousness; the enthusiasm, decision, energy, mindfulness, equanimity, and attention - these states were defined by him one by one as they occurred; known to him those states arose, known they were present, known they disappeared. He understood thus: ’So indeed, these states, not having been, come into being; having been, they vanish.’ Regarding those states he abided un-attracted, un-repelled, independent, detached, free, dissociated, with a mind rid of barriers. He understood, ‘There is an escape beyond this’, and with the cultivation of that attainment he confirmed that there is.

11] "Again, bhikkhus, with the complete surmounting of perceptions of form, with the disappearance of perceptions of sensory impact, with non-attention to perceptions of diversity, aware that ‘Space is Infinite,’ Sariputta entered upon and abided in the base of Infinite Space.

12] "And the states in the base of Infinite Space - the perception of the base of Infinite Space and the unification of mind; the contact, feeling, perception, volition and consciousness; the enthusiasm, decision, energy, mindfulness, equanimity, and attention - these states were defined by him one by one as they occurred; known to him they arose, known they were present, known they disappeared. He understood thus: ‘So indeed, these states, not having been, come into being; having been, they vanish’. Regarding those states, he abided un-attracted, un-repelled, independent, detached, free, dissociated, with a mind rid of barriers. He understood: ‘There is an escape beyond this,’ and with the cultivation of that attainment, he confirmed that there is.

13] "Again, bhikkhus, by completely surmounting the base of Infinite Space, aware that ‘Consciousness is Infinite’, Sariputta entered upon and abided in the base of ‘Infinite Consciousness’.

14] "And the states in the base of ‘Infinite Consciousness’ - the perception of the base of ‘Infinite Consciousness’ and the unification of mind; the contact, feeling, perception, volition, and consciousness; the enthusiasm, decision, energy, mindfulness, equanimity, and attention - these states were defined by him one by one as they occurred; known to him those states arose, known they were present, known they disappeared. He understood thus: ‘ So indeed, these states, not having been, come into being: having been they vanish.’ Regarding those states he abided un-attracted, un-repelled, independent, detached, free, dissociated, with a mind rid of barriers. He understood: ‘There is an escape beyond this’, and with the cultivation of that attainment, he confirmed that there is.

15] "Again, bhikkhus, by completely surmounting the base of Infinite Consciousness, aware that there is ‘Nothing’, Sariputta entered upon and abided in the base of ‘Nothingness’.

16] "And the states in the base of ‘Nothingness’ - the perception of the base of ‘Nothingness’ and the unification of mind; the contact, feeling, perception, volition and consciousness, the enthusiasm, decision, energy, mindfulness, equanimity, and attention - these states were defined by him one by one as they occurred; know to him those states arose, known they were present, known they disappeared. He understood thus: ‘So indeed, these states not having been, come into to being; having been, they vanish.’ Regarding these states he abided un-attracted, un-repelled, independent, detached, free, dissociated, with a mind rid of barriers. He understood: ‘There is an escape beyond this’, and with the cultivation of that attainment, he confirmed that there is.

17] "Again, bhikkhus, by completely surmounting the base of ‘Nothingness’ Sariputta entered upon and abided in the base of neither perception nor non-perception.

18] "He emerged mindful from that attainment. Having done so, he contemplated the states that had passed, ceased and changed, thus: ‘So indeed, these states, not having been, come into being; having been they vanished. Regarding those states, he abided un-attracted, un-repelled, independent, detached, free, dissociated, with a mind rid of barriers. He understood: ‘There is an escape beyond this,’ and with the cultivation of that attainment, he confirmed that there is.

19] "Again, bhikkhus, by completely surmounting the base of neither perception nor non-perception, Sariputta entered upon and abided in the cessation of perception and feeling. And his taints were destroyed by his seeing with wisdom.

20] "He emerged mindful from that attainment. Having done so, he recalled the sates that had passed, ceased, and changed, thus: ‘So indeed, these states, not having been, come into being; having been, they vanish.’ Regarding those states, he abided un-attracted, un-repelled, independent, detached, free, dissociated, with a mind rid of barriers. He understood: ‘There is no escape beyond this,’ and with the cultivation of that attainment, he confirmed that there is not’.

21] "Bhikkhus, rightly speaking, were it to be said of anyone: ‘He has attained mastery and perfection in noble virtue, attained mastery and perfection in noble collectedness, attained mastery and perfection in noble wisdom, attained mastery and perfection in noble deliverance,’ it is of Sariputta indeed that rightly speaking this should be said.

22] "Bhikkhus, rightly speaking, were it to be said of anyone: ‘He is the son of the Blessed One, born of his breast, born of his mouth, born of the Dhamma, created by the Dhamma, an heir in the Dhamma, not an heir in material things,’ it is of Sariputta indeed that rightly speaking this should be said.

23] "Bhikkhus, the matchless Wheel of Dhamma set rolling by the Tathagata is kept rolling rightly by Sariputta."

That is what the Blessed One said. The Bhikkhus were satisfied and delighted in the Blessed One’s words.

Sutta translation (C) Bhikkhu Bodhi 1995, 2001. Reprinted from The Middle Length Discourses of the Buddha

Revised April 23 - 2003

Awakening Faith in Mind - Seng-ts'an

2011-01-20T07:05:00.003Z

The great way isn't difficult for those who are unattached to their preferences.

Let go of longing and aversion, and everything will be perfectly clear.

When you cling to a hairbreadth of distinction, heaven and earth are set apart.

If you want to realize the truth, don't be for or against.

The struggle between good and evil is the primal disease of the mind.

Not grasping the deeper meaning, you just trouble your minds serenity.

As vast as infinite space, it is perfect and lacks nothing.

But because you select and reject, you can't perceive its true nature.

Don't get entangled in the world; don't lose yourself in emptiness.

Be at peace in the oneness of things, and all errors will disappear by themselves.

If you don't live the Tao, you fall into assertion or denial.

Asserting that the world is real, you are blind to its deeper reality;

denying that the world is real, you are blind to the selflessness of all things.

The more you think about these matters, the farther you are from the truth.

Step aside from all thinking, and there is nowhere you can't go.

Returning to the root, you find the meaning;

chasing appearances, you lose there source.

At the moment of profound insight, you transcend both appearance and emptiness.

Don't keep searching for the truth; just let go of your opinions.

For the mind in harmony with the Tao, all selfishness disappears.

With not even a trace of self-doubt, you can trust the universe completely.

All at once you are free, with nothing left to hold on to.

All is empty, brilliant, perfect in its own being.

In the world of things as they are, there is no self, no non self.

If you want to describe its essence, the best you can say is "Not-two."

In this "Not-two" nothing is separate, and nothing in the world is excluded.

The enlightened of all times and places have entered into this truth.

In it there is no gain or loss; one instant is ten thousand years.

There is no here, no there; infinity is right before your eyes.

The tiny is as large as the vast when objective boundaries have vanished;

the vast is as small as the tiny when you don't have external limits.

Being is an aspect of non-being; non-being is no different from being.

Until you understand this truth, you won't see anything clearly.

One is all; all are one. When you realize this, what reason for holiness or wisdom?

The mind of absolute trust is beyond all thought, all striving,

is perfectly at peace, for in it there is no yesterday, no today, no tomorrow.

This World of Dew - Issa

2011-01-16T10:44:00.005Z

露の世は露の世ながらさりながら
Tsuyu no yo wa tsuyu no yo nagara sari nagara

The world of dew --
A world of dew it is indeed,
And yet, and yet . . .

Issa

As many buddhas as there may be in any world

2010-10-21T13:15:00.000Z

Then the great enlightening being Universally Good, thus explaining
courses of eons, as many eons as atoms in the untold buddha-lands in the succession
of worlds, went on to make a vow:

As many buddhas as there may be in any world
Throughout the ten directions, throughout past, present, and future,
I honor them all, without exception,
Pure in body, speech, and mind.
With as many bodies as atoms in all lands
I bow to all buddhas,
With a mind directed to all buddhas,
By the power of the vow of the practice of good.
In a single atom, Buddhas as many as atoms
Sit in the midst of enlightening beings;
So it is of all things in the cosmos—
I realize all are filled with buddhas.
I laud all the buddhas therein,
Expounding in all languages
The qualities of all buddhas,
With endless oceans of manifestations.
With the finest flowers, garlands,
Musical instruments, perfumes and parasols,
The finest lamps and incenses,
I make offerings to those buddhas.
With the finest clothes, fragrances,
And mountainous baskets of aromatic powders,
With the finest of all kinds of adornments
I make offerings to those buddhas.
Whatever be the best of offerings,
I produce them for all buddhas;
By the power of devotion to the practice of good,
I honor and serve all buddhas.
Whatever evil I may commit
Under the sway of passion, hatred, or folly,
Bodily, verbally, or mentally,
I confess it all.
And whatever the virtue of beings everywhere,
Hearers, saints, self-conquerors,
Enlightening beings and buddhas,
In all that I do rejoice.
And all the Lamps of the Worlds in the ten directions
Who have realized enlightenment and attain nonobstruction
I seek as guides, that they may turn
The supreme wheel of teaching.
And those who wish to manifest extinction
I petition respectfully to remain
For eons as many as atoms in the land
For the welfare and happiness of all beings.
By honor, service, and direction,
By appreciating, seeking, and requesting teachings,
Whatever good I have accumulated,
I dedicate it all to enlightenment.
May the buddhas of the past be honored,
As well as those now in the worlds of the ten directions,
And may those of the future be at ease,
Filled with joy, having realized enlightenment.
May all the lands of the ten directions
Be purified, supreme, and filled
With buddhas and enlightening beings
At the tree of enlightenment.
May all beings in the ten directions
By happy and well;
May all beings' righteous aim be successful,
May their hope be realized.
As I am carrying out enlightenment practice,
May I recall my lives in all states;
In every lifetime, as I die and am reborn,
May I always transcend the mundane.
Learning from all buddhas,
Fulfilling the practice of good,
I will practice pure conduct,
Always free from defect.
I will expound the Teaching
In the languages of gods and dragons,
In the languages of demons and humans,
And of all living beings.
May those engaged in the ways of transcendence
Not stray from enlightenment;
And may all evils to be inhibited
Be thoroughly extinguished.
I will traverse the paths of the world
Free from compulsion, affliction, and delusion,
Like a lotus unstained by water,
Like the sun and moon unattached in the sky.
Extinguishing all the miseries of bad states
And bringing all beings to happiness,
I will act for the welfare of all beings
In all lands everywhere.
According with the conduct of sentient beings
While fulfilling the practice of enlightenment,
And cultivating the practice of good,
Thus will I act throughout future eons.
May I always be in communion
With those who share my practice;
Physically, verbally, and mentally,
I will carry out vows as one practice.
And may I always be with my benefactors,
Who teach me the practice of good;
May I never displease them.
May I always see the buddhas face to face,
Surrounded by enlightening beings;
I will make fine offerings to them
Forever, unwearied.
Preserving the true teaching of buddhas,
Illumining the practice of enlightenment,
And purifying the practice of good,
I will practice for all future eons.
Migrating through all states of being,
Having acquired inexhaustible virtue and knowledge,
May I become an inexhaustible treasury of wisdom and means,
Concentration, liberation, and all virtues.
As I carry on the practice of enlightenment,
May I see the inconceivable buddhas sitting among enlightening beings
In the lands as numerous as atoms
That are in each atom.
Thus may I perceive the oceans
Of buddhas and lands of all times
In each point in the ten directions
As I practice for myriad eons.
May I ever penetrate the eloquence of buddhas,
The voices of all buddhas which adapt to mentalities,
The purity of articulation of all buddhas,
By the sounds of the ocean of tones in a single utterance.
Into those infinite voices
Of all buddhas of all times
May I enter by buddha-power,
Turning the wheel of teaching.
May I enter all eons
Of the future instantly,
And may I act in all eons
Of all times within an instant.
May I see all buddhas of all times
In one instant
And always enter their sphere
By the magical power of liberation.
May I produce the arrays of all lands
Of all times in an atom,
May I thus perceive all the arrays
Of buddha-lands in all the ten directions.
Learning the teachings of
The Lamps of the Worlds to come,
I visit all the Guides
Who have passed away to eternal rest.
By occult powers, swift in all ways,
By the power of knowledge, all-sided,
By the power of practice, with all virtues,
By the power of universal love,
By the power of goodness, all pure,
By the power of knowledge, unobstructed,
Gathering the power of enlightenment,
Clearing away the power of acts,
Destroying the power of afflictions,
Vitiating the power of demons,
May I fulfill all powers
Of the practice of good.
Purifying oceans of lands,
Liberating oceans of beings,
Observing oceans of truths,
Plumbing oceans of knowledge,
Perfecting oceans of practices,
Fulfilling oceans of vows,
Serving oceans of buddhas,
May I practice, untiring, for oceans of eons.
The lofty vows of enlightenment practice
Of the buddhas of past, present, and future
May I fulfill completely,
Practice what is good, and realize enlightenment.
All who share in the practice
Of the sage of Universal Good,
The foremost offspring of all buddhas,
I name them good.
Pure in body, speech, and mind,
Pure in conduct, with a pure land,
As the sage is named Good,
May I become thus equally.
May I carry out the vow of Manjushri
To totally purify the practice of good;
Tireless through all future ages,
May I fulfill all those tasks.
May there be no limits to practice,
And no limit to virtues;
Persisting in infinite practices,
I know all their miraculous creations.
As long as the earth exists,
As long as all beings exist,
As long as acts and afflictions exist,
So long will my vow remain.
Let me give the buddhas all worlds
In the ten directions adorned with jewels,
Let me give celestials and humans supreme happiness
For eons as many as atoms.
Those who develop respect and devotion
On hearing this supreme dedication,
Seeking supreme enlightenment,
Will be most blessed.
They will have abandoned all evils
And all bad associates
And will quickly see Infinite Light,
If they have this vow of enlightening practice.
Great is their gain, worthwhile their life,
Auspicious their birth as humans;
They will soon be like
The universally good enlightening being.
Those who have committed hellish crimes
Under the sway of ignorance
Will quickly put an end to them all
When this practice of good is expounded.
Endowed with knowledge, distinction, and nobility,
Invulnerable to false teachers and demons,
They will be honored
By all in the triple world.
They will quickly go to the
Tree of enlightenment
And sit there for the benefit
Of all living beings;
They will realize enlightenment,
Turn the wheel of teaching,
And conquer the devil
And all its cohorts.
Buddha knows those who hold this vow to practice good,
Who cause it to be told of and taught;
The fruit of this is supreme enlightenment—
Do not entertain any doubt.
As the hero Manjushri knows, so too does Universal Good;
As I learn from them I dedicate all this virtue.
By the supreme dedication praised by the buddhas of all times
I dedicate all this virtue to the practice of highest good.
Acting in accord with the time, may I remove all obstructions,
May I see Infinite Light face to face and go to the land of bliss.
There, may all these vows be complete;
Having fulfilled them, I will work for the weal of all beings in the world.
Let me abide in the circle of that buddha, born in a beautiful lotus,
And receive the prophecy of buddhahood there in the presence
Of the buddha of Infinite Light.
Having received the prophecy there, with millions of emanations
I will work for the weal of beings everywhere, by the power of Buddha.
By whatever virtue I accumulate, having invoked the vow to practice
good,
May the pure aspiration of the world he at once all fulfilled.
By the endless surpassing blessing realized from dedication
To the practice of good,
May worldlings submerged in the torrent of passion
Go to the higher realm of Infinite Light.

The Tao is a Silent Flower

2010-10-15T07:56:00.005Z

The Tao is a silent flower which blooms through the night,
But the night through which it blooms is the flower itself.
No Tao, no flower, no bloomer, no night.
And for this reason, it blooms.

Eight Extremes - Nagarjuna

2010-06-03T05:27:00.001Z

Based on dependent origination something occurs, yet
There is no arising nor passing away.
There is no nihilism nor eternalism.
There is no coming nor going.
There are not many nor one event(s).
Whatever tends to be elaborated becomes almost calm again and again.

Nagarjuna.

When you meditate it seems as though a lot of experiences arise. You see this, you see that, and it seems to pass into and out of awareness, each experience followed by another.

And yet as meditation deepens, the ability to clearly see 'things' or experiences fades away. This isn't because your awareness is getting duller or you are losing your ability to retain any clarity in meditation. On the contrary, it actually happens as awareness and clarity deepen.

As your meditation deepens you find that what formerly appeared as substantial now no longer has such a distinct and demarcated identity. You increasingly find it hard to see exactly where 'something' is, or where it isn't.

There seems little doubt that something is occurring, that something is arising. Yet you cannot in any way point to it, and say 'this is this' or 'that is that'.

Do things arise? I really have no idea.

Do they cease? I don't know.

Do they appear to arise - it would seem so. Where are they, or where were they - I have no idea. And so it goes.

Such definites as 'it does exist' fade away. They simply don't hold. And equally their negation - it doesn't exist' don't apply to what you experience, what you know - at all.

Mind is as it is. Experience is as it is. And there's little that one can say about it.

What Colour is the Wind?

2010-06-02T07:53:00.000Z

What Colour is the Wind?

Zen saying.

Savaripa on the Nature of Mind

2010-06-01T15:31:00.001Z

In the process of searching for all that manifests as mind and matter
There is neither anything to be found nor is there any seeker,
For to be unreal is to be unborn and unceasing
In the three periods of time.
That which is immutable
Is the state of great bliss.

Savaripa.

I thought I'd share this quote from Savaripa (Shavaripa) - the eighth century India mahasiddha.

Mahamudra meditation uses insight or vipassana meditation methods just like any other Buddhist path. Indeed, surprising to some it uses a lot of questioning, which is often thought to be more the realm of madhyamika rather than mahamudra. The texts don't always tell you *how* you work with questions - leading to the impression that it's a conceptual investigation. This couldn't be further from the truth.

One the mind is resting (through mahamudra shamatha) you can then turn mind on itself, and pose a question:

Where is my mind?

Once this question is posed, don't seek to intellectually understand the answer. Just rest in the what follows. Should a gap arise, then rest in that gap. Don't seek to do anything other than rest, right there. After a while, you could pose another question:

Where is experience?

Again, let go of intellectual speculation, and just rest in what follows. If an experience of where experience *is*, or more likely, of where it *isn't* arises, then rest in that. Should an experience of experience not being found arise, then rest in that. This is an insight into the lack of fixed location of experience - an characteristic that experience, or mind lacks.

Just rest there in that experience, if you can, and the experience may deepen. Or it might drop off, either into conceptualisation, or into distractedness.

What am I?

Rest there. You might find this seems to give rise to a shift. That shift may be related to what is arising in experience, and knowing that experience, to what knows that experience. Ultimately you may not be able to separate these - they are inseparable, but there's a definite shift possible when changing questioning to this aspect.

I generally don't ask 'who am I?' as that will most likely bring up all sorts of connotations which might not be helpful.

In this way we use the conceptual aspect of the mind to pose questions, and rest in whatever arises out of this.

When you are able to rest in the shift that results from both these types of questions, you may find a knowing arises, a knowing that there is nothing to be found, and no seeker either.

Please forgive my inane ramblings on practicing Mahamudra, inspired as they were by Savaripa's beautiful song.

Dharma Song (excerpt) from Kalu Rinpoche

2010-05-28T06:51:00.003Z

E Ma Ho!
How wonderful!

Remain relaxed, without clinging or contrivance
Within mind's nature, like space,
Free from any reference point
And with the vigor of vivid, mindful awareness.

Whatever outward or inward movement of thought arises,
Don't lose hold of the vital inner glow of the expanse of mindfulness.
Don't fabricate [mental states].
Rest your mind as it is -
It will be liberated into the absolute expanse.

Kalu Rinpoche

I was reading this song from Kalu Rinpoche last night, and thought I'd share the beginning of it.

Rinpoche's description of Mahamudra meditation comes from the Shangpa Kagyu tradition, but is no different to the Kagyu teachings I've received. Rest in awareness, without trying to do anything - and mind will free itself, all of itself.

Don't take this or that as a vantage point, as a frame of reference, and indulge in comparisons. Don't strive after this or that. Just rest in awareness, just as it is. However it is - is fine. It's ok. It doesn't need to be anything else.

Whatever thoughts arise - it's fine. Whatever experiences arise - it's fine. Whatever arises that appears as outer experience - stuff seemingly going on 'out there' in the world, or as inner experience - stuff seemingly happening 'in here' - this dreamlike mirage of experience - just rest in that experience.

Kalu Rinpoche describes beautifully the difference between the resting and doing nothing of Mahamudra or Dzogchen, and the doing nothing of just zoning out, or being lost in thought. It's easy to imagine that you are doing Mahamudra by thinking I don't need to do anything - whatever it is, however it is .... that's Mahamudra. But what's missing there, in that not-doing?

Awareness.

... and resting in that.

Don't do anything in meditation - that's for sure. Don't try to fabricate anything, and make this or that experience arise, or try to get away from or transform this or that experience. But without awareness you are just lost. Lost in dualism and caught up in your 'normal' daydreaming state. This isn't 'ordinary mind'.

Just rest in whatever is - whatever is - without losing hold of the vital inner glow of the expanse of mindfulness - as Rinpoche calls it.

Rest in whatever is - and knowing will arise, and liberation is right there.

E Ma Ho!

How wonderful!

Simply Wait - Franz Kafka

2010-05-25T08:05:00.002Z

You do not need to leave your room.
Remain sitting at the table and listen.
Do not even listen, simply wait.
Do not even wait, be still and solitary.
The world will freely offer itself to you to be unmasked, it has no choice.
It will roll in ecstasy at your feet.

Franz Kafka (1883-1924)

I love this quotation - it really speaks to me about how easy it is to do something in meditation, to try to fabricate experience. It speaks so well of how I can let go of a sense of effort, of a sense of goal, or even of something to evaluate the meditation by, and how underneath that letting go there's often something else which I'm clinging to which in turn can be let go of.

The path to effortless meditation is often for me a shedding of onion layers. I see something clearly once my mind relaxes and rests in a seeing, and then I'm in a postion to simply let go. Not a 'doing' let go - just a 'letting go' which happens of itself.

Only then can I hope to see a more subtle clinging, or a more subtle fabrication.

I can't just drop it all at once, I find. And that too is part of the letting go.

Kafta describes beautifully the reorientation away from needing experiences 'out there' - the constant search for stimulation and meaning and resolution 'in the world', towards contemplation, towards knowing the nature of all that arises in experience. Instead of being transfixed by the seemingly dazzling variety of solid experiences, we find a dreamlike nature to experience itself, and of ourselves. And then, strangely enough, a fascination arises at this utter emptiness, yet play of appearances.

And Kafka's punchline here? That the nature of things will reveal itself, all of itself - it has no choice. Let go and be. Let go and allow experience to unfold. Let go and know.

You don't have to strive after a goal, of enlightenment, of freedom from suffering, as it will come to you on its own, effortlessly. Trust in that, and let go.

Rehearsing my life

2010-02-19T16:09:00.001Z

I was just reflecting on just how much time I spend rehearsing my life, rather than, in a sense, just living it directly.

By this I mean .... how much time do I spend thinking about what I should do in the future? How much time is caught up in going through various scenarios of what should happen, what could happen, what might happen .... in myriad detail?

Compulsively these thoughts churn, end on end ... tumbling in my mind.

Me trying to get ahead of the game. Me trying to get on top, me trying to beat someone else in some way.

Trying to visualise better outcomes. Trying to get it 'right'.

And all of it imagined experiences, imagines scenarios of what might be.

So why am I doing this, out of control, compulsively spawning these versions of what could transpire?

Why am I not simply experiencing what is, right here?

Is the discomfort of sensations I don't fully want to experience the driving force? Is it that I can't fully allow these things to entirely permeate my awareness and allow myself to fully dwell in these things, however uncomfortable, however dull, is it this which compels me to spawn imaginary futures in which I rehearse life?

Of course being in the present and just experiencing life could mean just = fully experiencing these thoughts as *they* are what is right now as much as any bodily sensation, any feeling, any visual or auditory sensation, would be. Mahamudra has no enemies, especially not though.

Yet I tend not to experience it this way, at times. Thoughts are so seductive that I lose the open aspect of experience, the sense of thoughts in awareness, alongside all other sensations of being at that moment ... and just get sucking into the content of the thought, losing all else to awareness.

And so it goes on, rehearsing, rehearsing, instead of opening to life as it is .....

Sometimes it's like this ......

One Who Is Awake

2009-11-28T11:16:00.014Z

I came across this today, apparently an excerpt from Karen Armstrong's upcoming book - The Case for God. It was such a beautiful piece of writing, and sentiment, that I thought I'd reproduce it here:

From almost the very beginning, men and women have repeatedly engaged in strenuous and committed religious activity. They evolved mythologies, rituals and ethical disciplines that brought them intimations of holiness that seemed in some indescribable way to enhance and fulfil their humanity. They were not religious simply because their myths and doctrines were scientifically or historically sound, because they sought information about the cosmos, or merely because they wanted a better life in the the hereafter. They were not bludgeoned into faith by power-hungry priests or kings; indeed religion often helped people to oppose tyranny and oppression of this kind. The point of religion was to live intensely and richly here and now. Religious people are ambitious. They want lives overflowing with significance. They have always desired to integrate with their daily lives the moments of rapture and insight that came to them in dreams, in their contemplation of nature and in their intercourse with one another and with the animal world. Instead of being crushed and embittered by the sorrow of life, they sought to retain their peace and serenity in the midst of their pain.

They yearned for the courage to overcome their terror of mortality; instead of being grasping and mean-spirited, they aspired to live generously, large-heartedly and justly and to inhabit every single part of their humanity. Instead of being a mere workaday cup, they wanted, as Confucius suggested, to transform themselves in to a beautiful ritual vessel brimful of the sanctity that they were learning to see in life. Thy tried to honour the ineffable mystery then sensed in each human being and create societies that honoured the stranger, the alien, the poor and the oppressed. Of course they often failed. but overall they found that the disciplines of religion helped them to do all this. Those who applied themselves most assiduously showed that it was possible for mortal men and women to live on a higher, divine or godlike plane and thus wake up to their true selves.

One day a brahmin priest came across the Buddha sitting in contemplation under a tree and was astonished by his serenity, stillness and self-discipline. The impression of immense strength channelled creatively into an extraordinary peace reminded him of a great tusker elephant. "Are you a god, sir?" the priest asked. "Are you an angel...or a spirit?" No, the Buddha replied. He explained that he had simply revealed a new potential in human nature. It was possible to live in this world of conflict and pain at peace and in harmony with one's fellow creatures. There was no point in merely believing it; you would only discover its truth if you practices his method, systematically cutting off egotism at the root. You would then live at the peak of your capacity, activate parts of the psyche that normally lie dormant, and become fully enlightened human beings. "Remember me, " the Buddha told the curious priest, "as one who is awake."

This story of the first person that the Buddha met after his Enlightenment has always been a powerful one for me. There are so many strands here - he did not recognize him for what he was, he passed on by after the Buddha told him what he was, not knowing how to profit from the encounter ..... and on and on ....

The notion that the Buddha is one who is awake - fully and utterly awake to their experience - has also remained powerful and poignant. Not about being someone different, becoming someone different, becoming anything other than what we are, right now. But opening fully, and utterly to what is, right now, and seeing it for what it is, not lost in it, not entranced and seduced by it, but seeing it for what it is, in the fullest possible context, in detail, and it nature. Fully awake.

Karen summarizes so well the best of this inner urge that many of us feel, that seems to have become a little lost in the public eye, transfixed as it is with the words and deeds of fundamentalists.

Reflection on Khakhyab Dorje - Melody of Buzzing Bees

2009-11-17T07:38:00.003Z

I began this post a couple of months ago and wasn't able to finish it. I thought I'd just publish what was there, as the teaching from Khakhyab Dorje is extraordinarily rich ...

Last night I dreamt of HH15 Karmapa, Khakhyab Dorje, so thought sharing 'Melody of Buzzing Bees' would be auspicious.

Just a few reflections, unnecessarily trying to gild a solid gold statue:

You are the primordial ground, Buddha Vajradhara,
Unobstructed manifestation, the body of great compassion.
You posses the kindness that delivers Buddha into the palm of one's hand,
Please enjoy being an ornament on the top of my head.

This nature that's there in *all* experience, the primordial ground, which Khakhyab Dorje refers to as the Buddha Vajradhara is the groundlessness of experience. This never changes whatever arises in our mind, whether pleasant or unpleasant, skilful or unskilful, nor whether englightened or not. It's always there and is known as Buddha Nature. You don't have to become something else to be enlightened. You don't have to become something else. Right there, right here - where is the ground in whatever you experience right now?

How beautiful the image of keeping the lama who shows you the nature of mind, the nature of all possible experiences, above your head. How beautiful.

Your son supplicates with devotion and longing;
Father Rinpoche, please look on me with kindness.
Lord, by the light rays of your kindness,
The darkness of confused ego-fixation has been cleared.

To develop sufficient level of attention so that we can remain aware in *any* experience, however unpleasant, however hooked into past actions and patterns and conditioning, then we need a lot of energy available to that attention. In Vajrayana that energy comes from cultivating devotion to the guru. It could be loving kindness or compassion, such as in the Hinayana or Mahayana. For myself, what matters most is that the emotional energy, the energy that can move mountains, is there. It's clear how powerful emotions are compared with thoughts. You can feel the whole shift when emotions stir. Having that available to fuel your attention underlies your ability to remain in attention when appearances beguile.

NAMO GURU-GUNASAGARAYA
You are the primordial ground, Buddha Vajradhara,
Unobstructed manifestation, the body of great compassion.
You posses the kindness that delivers Buddha into the palm of one's hand,
Please enjoy being an ornament on the top of my head.

Having obtained a human body this one time,
I was accepted by your great kindness, lord.
You, the Jetsun who makes this free and well-favoured birth meaningful,
Please dwell inseparably in the very centre of my heart.

Your son supplicates with devotion and longing;
Father Rinpoche, please look on me with kindness.
Lord, by the light rays of your kindness,
The darkness of confused ego-fixation has been cleared.

In this song of the realization of the pure ultimate natural state,
These naive words are like the buzzing of a bee.
Although they irritate the ears of the father Jetsun,
Your son, with overwhelming longing,
Offers this song of nonsense words; please think of me with compassion.

In general, this body endowed with the eight freedoms and the ten favourable circumstances
Is more excellent than the wish-fulfilling gem.
Obtaining this body,
I know it to be the power of unperverted merit.

Although I have obtained it, it is impermanent,
And, therefore, the moment of death is unavoidable, as is said.
Since one never knows when it will come,
I wonder, "When will death come for me?"

The cause and effect of karma ripens infallibly in everyone
Just like a see that has been planted.
Because of my actions of deceiving myself and others,
I wonder, "What will my end be like?"

In general, ignorance, the great city of samsara,
Is filled with endless and strenuous suffering.
When I think about this, I almost lose my mind.
Panic-stricken, I wonder, "When will I be liberated?"

My body, blown by the wind of bad karma,
Falls from the precipice of the wrong path.
Now I am sunk in the mud of samsara; please look on me here!
Kind lord, precious Guru,
Please protect me from this terror.

Through a break in my evil karma, I discovered good karma.
I met the father Jetsun, the excellent true Buddha
Whose essence if Sri Cakrasamvara.
The skin of ignorant ego-fixation fell away from me,
And the great knot tied by passion and aggression was loosened.

As for the klesas, produced by the three poisons,
The object of their arising, the arising itself, and the one who gives rise to them
Are all projections of mind.
Like a reflection in a mirror,
Their essence is empty.
Like waves merging with the ocean,
they subside into empty ineffable space.

External phenomenal objects: forms, sounds, smells, tastes, and objects of touch,
All these phenomena are no other
Than the magical tricks of mind.
Like a child who builds sand castles,
It is mind that fixates on names.
Realizing that this is unreal is also mind.

Therefore, nothing exists as separate from mind
Neither as substance nor as a mark.
Realizing that everything is the manifestation of mind,
So-called samsara and Nirvana,
Considered to be bad and good respectively, do not exist.
Realization that mind is the manifestation of Dharmakaya,
The natural state of self-existing mind
Does not exist as form or substance.

It completely passes beyond even being shown by analogy.
To say "emptiness" is not total negation;
Rather, its nature is luminosity,
All-pervasive like space.
To say "existence" is not to establish a reality.
Just like space,
It does not exist, but it is very luminous.
Although it arises, it does not exist as separate,
But is liberated in the essence of this luminosity.
Like clouds in the sky,
It arises from space and dissolves into space.

In short, the phenomenal world is mind.
From the aspect of its luminosity, there is appearance.
From the aspect of its essence, there is emptiness.
Neither Buddhas nor sentient beings
Exist as separately established things.
All the so-called gods and demons do not so exist.
Everything is mind.
Mind is self-existing luminosity.
It passes beyond all arising, ceasing, and projecting.
It is free from dwelling, coming, or going anywhere.
Other than this ineffable mind,
There is no Vajradhara.
Mind is luminous;
I have confidence in realizing that this is so.

Jetsun, this realization is your kindness.
Rinpoche, now I remember your kindness.
Please look upon me, one of bad karma, with compassion.
Father Jetsun, ultimate Vajradhara,
Time and time again I think of you and devotion blazes up;
With undistracted longing I supplicate you.
Father, grant your blessings so that we may be beyond meeting and parting.

This song of experience
I offer to your ears, father Jetsun.
If there has been any stain of error,
Please wash it away with the amrta of loving kindness.
This son supplicates with one-pointed longing;
Please accept me with the iron hook of your compassion..

At the Karma Vihara of Akanistha, the great Dharma palace of the Buddha Karmapa, in the year of the Iron Tiger called Vikrta, I offered this song with great devotion of body, speech, and mind at the feet of the omniscient Jetsun, the king of Dharma.

Today is a Good Day to Die

2009-10-05T07:43:00.007Z

Today is a good day to die!

Tasunka Witko, Crazy Horse

If you are truly prepared for death like this, then you are truly prepared for life too.

Nothing Special

2009-03-07T12:21:00.009Z

Zen is not some kind of excitement, but concentration on our usual everyday routine.

Shunryu Suzuki

I love this quote.

It's not about having special experience. No experience with 'save you', or give you eternal happiness. You cannot take refuge in particular experiences. Not satori, not insight, not enlightenment, not getting there.

It's just right here, right now, opening to what is, fully, deeply, clearly. Not trying to get somewhere else. Not trying to change or manipulate it. Not trying to get comfortable. Not preferring this to that.

And being able to rest in it, this nowness, without reactivity. Rest in whatever arises. Rest in the groundlessness of experience. Rest in whatever life serves up. Rest there, with an open heart. Allowing the moment to soak you, to teach you, to whisper in your ear.

And when you can just rest there, in however it is, then you'll know what to do, in each and every experience. Without thought, without plans, without judgment, without agendas.

So we can just get on with life, without trying to get somewhere else, each moment open, each moment aware, each moment knowing what it is that needs to be done. Not for me, not for you, but just what needs to be done.

You don't have to chase after something special. Special is all around, already here. Just open to it.

And then the Dakini's warm breath will be felt at *your* ear.

All Experience is Mind

2009-03-05T08:18:00.013Z

All experience is mind is probably a misleading title for this post. It seems to suggest that experiences are ‘something’, and that this something is ‘mind’ – a thing. It’s as if there is this thing called mind which exists, and our job is to discover it, to reveal it. But actually, it doesn’t!

Instead, we could see this title as pointing to what is the starting point in many ways for the path of Mahamudra. As normal people, we tend to view the world as a ‘me’ in here, and a whole bunch of stuff ‘out there’ – other people, other living beings, inanimate objects, etc. It all seems so natural seeing the world this way. Yet the very basis of the path transforms our view here, and points to a radically different way to view our life.

For as long as we are caught up in this dualistic view of the world, we’ll experience suffering. We’ll be forever caught up in pushing and pulling at our experience, accepting and rejecting, wanting and not wanting – a cycle of trying to somehow ‘make it right’, to adjust stuff, so that we can experience happiness, ease and contentment. This cycle of adjustment, of constant nagging dissatisfaction with our experience, with somehow being in struggle, with needing to transform how it is seems endless, it just goes on and on. That’s why Samsara is said to be endless. For as long as we experience things as if ‘I’ am ‘in here’, and the rest is ‘out there’ ... then this struggle goes on.

Dukkha.

Samsara.

Yet, the Dharma says ‘it needn’t be so’. That it is possible to live in ease, with contentment, and with peace in our hearts, whatever is happening, whatever we may encounter at that time.

When we practice Mahamudra we learn to rest in awareness. We learn to bring attention to our lives and to rest in that attention, without trying to make it any different to how it is. We are not trying to avoid experiences we don't like. We are not applying antidotes to things we view as 'bad'. We are not even trying to transform our experience.

We simply rest in our experience and allow ourselves to fully experience it. All of it.

At any moment, we have body sensations. At that same moment, we have emotions. We have stories going through our mind. These things arise.

At any moment, can we experience all of this?

Can we allow our bodies to tell us what is happening on that level, even when we are swept up in the swirls of deep emotions?

Can we know what our bodies are telling us when the stories are running at express speed in our mind, justifying and judging, analysing and rationalising?

Can we open to all of it, all the time, whatever it is, however difficult it might seem to be?

As we practice this, this resting in experience, without trying to change it, or get away from it, but instead opening to its fullness, its variety, we begin to notice that our experience takes on a flavour of spaciousness. Rather than feeling as though we are shrunk down into 'this emotion', or 'this experience of physical pain', or 'this thought' ... a great openness unfolds, in which all our experience plays out. And play out it does, with whatever arises 'self-liberating' all by itself, without need for manipulation. What a relief this all is!!!!

Spacious openness, and self-liberation.

And in that spacious openness in which all experiences self-liberate, we begin to see that this thing we call 'life' is a succession of experiences, of sensations, emotions and thoughts. And, we begin to notice that there isn't much of a 'me' in all of that. We begin to see that the notion of 'me' is an experience which arises, which flickers into view from time to time, and which is no different to any other experience. Instead of imagining that there's this 'me' there which is at the centre of the universe, which is wrestling which this enormous universe, and which therefore seems forever locked up in a sense of struggle with something much larger than itself, and which constantly changes and constantly seems to frustrate our desire to have life as we want it ... instead of this ... we begin to see that there really isn't a 'me' in all of this, not in the way we thought there was. We begin to see that this notion of 'I' is just an appearance, and empty appearance. It arises like all other appearances. As such, it's not at the centre. It's just a mirage-like appearance, dancing and shimmering into view, but relatively rarely.

No constant me, right there in the centre of things.

Just a flickering appearance, empty of substance, which sometimes arises along with the rest.

So ... endless experiences in succession, of body sensations, thoughts and emotions. No 'me' in there. And no 'world' out there. Not 'my' sensations, thoughts and emotions now. Just appearances which we helpfully characterise as thoughts, emotions and sensations.

In this way, we come to see that what we call 'life' is the play of appearances, empty appearances, a flickering of experiences, without centre, without solidity.

What's it all about?

2009-02-18T07:38:00.003Z

... it's about opening to what is, every moment ... and being able to fully open to whatever arises. That's all.

It ain't about getting somewhere, having any particular sort of experience rather than another, however so called spiritual, or getting enlightened.

No place to go, nobody to be ...

just open and rest in the opening.

Such a simple thing, so extraordinarily simple. Rest in what already is. without preference.

then everything becomes possible.

(simple post on a simple thing that is the key to all doors)

Reflections on Niutou Farong - Song of Mind (Xin Ming)

2009-02-15T06:34:00.015Z

Some sleepy reflections when unable to sleep whilst ill ...

The nature of the mind is non-arising,
What need is there of knowledge and views?
Originally there is not a single dharma;
Why discuss inspiration and training?

Niutou Farong begins with the view, a view which includes the need to go beyond views. When we rest in awareness we are able to see that mind cannot be found, that experience cannot be found. It has no shape, no characteristics ... wherever we touch we find only melting, vast open no-thingness. This groundless nature of mind is non-arising. Why? Because that too we cannot find. It's not as if we've exchanged the seemingly solid stuff of ordinary existence with some profound 'thing' or 'reality' or 'transcendental' which somehow underlies all else, which somehow has eluded us up to now, and *now* we've got it, now we have the 'real deal', the 'real thing'. Nope, this groundlessness isn't there, it can't be found, or grasped, or seen. We all try to do that in meditation, to grasp onto how emptiness reveals itself.

To understand it rather than to know it ... but .. the nature of mind is non-arising. When we know this, truly and deeply, then words are a very poor substitute for this direct knowingness. Not even a finger pointing at a moon. More like a finger pointing to a moon which is altogether different to what 'moon' is to most of us. Not one 'thing' pointing to 'another thing'. One thing, pointing to no-thing. How things are? You won't find a single experience that can be grasped onto or held, however sublime. Not a single dharma originally exists. That's how it is, both prior to and after all that practice and training. You're just spun around and walking backwards through it all. Just not knowing yet.

Coming and going without beginning;
Sought for, it is not seen.
No need to do anything;
It is bright, still, self-apparent.

When we rest in knowing, though utterly groundless, yet endless appearances seemingly arise. Mind's nature is luminous, though utterly without ground. Empty appearances arise unimpededly, arising and ceasing, though where are they? When you rest in knowing, appearances clearly arise. Yet can you say where? Can you say when? Where and when just don't apply. Resting in knowing, mind has no shape. Yet when appearances are clearly there, has a shape come into being. Has mind/experience changed in any way. It seems to have, yet utterly groundless it remains. All these appearances - thoughts, feelings, stories, sensations, perceptions ... can any be truly found? Tell me ... where are they? Cause a thought to arise right now ... where is it? Did mind change when it arose? Did mind change when it ceased? You can seek for experiences ... profound experiences, wholesome experiences instead of the stuff you don't like, but this utter emptiness never changes, minds nature remains as is ... and all that seemingly arises, self-liberates, back to where ... who knows? From where? who knows. Profound mystery indeed. Never understood, but can be known. Bright and luminous, unmoving yet unceasing, revealing itself as Mahamudra always, however minds content should be. All of Samsara and Nirvana are not different to this. All experiences are of the same nature ... so why seek for certain experiences? for enlightenment, for purity, for something special?

The past is like empty space;
Know anything and the
Basic principle is lost,
Casting a clear light on the world,
Illuminating, yet obscured.

When appearances arise, they are vividly present. Yet soon they are gone. Where did they go? Watch closely. Know. However acute the mind, you won't see where they went. Our memory of them is what? More empty arisings. Groundless like empty space. Niutou here uses the word 'know' in a way I'm using the word 'understand'. Know anything and the principle is lost. I'd say, try to understand anything with concepts, with conceptual mind, and you are a million miles away. These words mislead. They are not suchness. Allow them to point directly, don't try to understand them. When we have our hard-won conceptual understanding, we think we finally know everything, the world is our oyster, we sit astride it .... illumined and understood. Yet the next disturbing emotion arises, the next pattern ... then bang! .... suffering again! Understanding will not save you!! .. hehehehe.

If one-mindedness is impeded,
All dharmas are misunderstood.
Coming and going thus,
Is there need for thorough investigation?

You won't see much ... meaning, you won't know it as it is if you mind cannot rest. Otherwise all you'll see is the waves, not the ocean. Mind you, the ocean isn't 'behind' the waves, like we all thought, like some pristine true reality, which we've never glimpsed. More like you see one thing, but it's something else, not behind it, or within it, or more truly it .... in one and the same thing, known differently, known as it is. These very appearances - anger, hopelessness, happiness, frustration, peacefulness .. not seeking to exchange one for the other, to get from one to only the other. Just knowing experience as it is. Then samsara *is* nirvana. Then samsara and nirvana are known to be inseparable. Without the ability to rest the mind, you'll only see everything that's stirred up and muddy. And then everything is misunderstood, experiences taken as solid and enduring, all dharmas are misunderstood.

Arising without the mark of arising,
Arising and illumination are the same.
Desiring to purify the mind,
There is no mind for effort.

Appearances don't leave any trace, like the bird flying across the sky. Does it leave a trail?

Spontaneous wisdom
Throughout time and space
Nothing is illuminated;
This is most profound.
Knowing dharmas is non-knowing;
Non-knowing is knowing the essential.

This knowingness which is incontrovertible. Which knows with a certainty that understanding never approaches. Which itself is vast, open and empty. Across all experience. Where does awareness begin? Where does it end? When looked for it's nowhere. Yet, equally, it's everywhere. Depends on how you wish to express it. You can't find it, yet it fills all of experience. Boundless and unending. Spontaneously co-arising, it knows appearances as they arise. It knows emptiness for what it is, ultimately illuminated, known as it is ... yet does emptiness or appearances change when they are known thus? Nope, just as they were. Illuminated, yet not illuminated. And this knowing, this incontrovertible direct seeing? Is that 'something'? Something you can grasp, something that you can understand, to intellectually makes sense of? Nope, non-knowing. A direct knowing which can't be found. A direct knowing of the one thing which makes a difference, ultimately. That all other realisation relies on. Knowing the essential frees you. This one aspect of all that seemingly arises. Don't get lost in the jungle. Know this one thing. Then you are at base-camp, and the journey can begin.

Sleepy, sleepy, sleepy head. Time to sleep now.

Homage to Niutou Farong, whose profound words I massacre:

The nature of the mind is non-arising,
What need is there of knowledge and views?
Originally there is not a single dharma;
Why discuss inspiration and training?

Coming and going without beginning;
Sought for, it is not seen.
No need to do anything;
It is bright, still, self-apparent.

The past is like empty space;
Know anything and the
Basic principle is lost,
Casting a clear light on the world,
Illuminating, yet obscured.

If one-mindedness is impeded,
All dharmas are misunderstood.
Coming and going thus,
Is there need for thorough investigation?

Arising without the mark of arising,
Arising and illumination are the same.
Desiring to purify the mind,
There is no mind for effort.

Spontaneous wisdom
Throughout time and space
Nothing is illuminated;
This is most profound.
Knowing dharmas is non-knowing;
Non-knowing is knowing the essential.

Using the mind to maintain quietude,
Birth and death forgotten;
This is original nature.

The highest principle cannot be explained;
It is neither free nor bound.
Lively and attuned to everything,
It is always right before you.

There is nothing in front of you;
Nothing, yet everything is as usual.
Do not belabor wisdom to examine it;
Substance itself is empty and obscure.

Thoughts arise and pass away,
The preceding no different from the succeeding.
If the succeeding thought does not arise,
The preceding thought cuts itself off.

In past, present, and future,
There is nothing;
No mind, no buddha.
Sentient beings are without mind;
Out of no-mind they manifest.

Distinguishing between profane and sacred,
Their vexations flourish.
Splitting hairs deviates from the eternal.
Seeking the real, you give up the true.

Discarding both is the cure,
Transparent, bright, pure.
No need for hard work or skill;
Keep to the actions of an infant.

Clearly knowing,
The net of views increases
Stillness without seeing,
Not moving in a dark room.

Wakeful without wandering,
The mind is tranquil yet bright.
All phenomena are real and eternal,
Profuse, yet of a single form.

Going, coming, sitting, standing,
Don't attach to anything.
Affirming no direction,
Can there be leaving or entering?

There is neither unifying nor dispersing,
Neither slow nor quick.
Brightness and tranquility are
Just as they are.
They cannot be explained in words.

Mind is without alienation;
No need to terminate lust.
Nature being empty, lust will
Depart by itself.
Allow the mind to float and sink.

Neither clear nor clouded,
Neither shallow nor deep.
Originally it was not ancient;
At present it is not modern.

Now it is non-abiding;
Now it is original mind.
Originally it did not exist;
"Origin" is the present moment.

Bodhi has always existed;
No need to preserve it.
Vexation has never existed,
No need to eliminate it.

Natural wisdom is self-illuminating;
All dharmas return to thusness.
There is no returning, no receiving;
Stop contemplating, forget keeping.

Wisdom from the Zen Classic "Xin Ming"
Translated by Master Sheng Yen

Using an Object as a Support - Concentration or Awakening

2009-02-09T05:54:00.011Z

From a reply on a Dharma list, where someone asked:
"I have an object such as watching the breath but I am constantly distracted. Please elaborate on "In order to keep from being distracted, that object is a support."

Hi there, one way you could approach this is by reviewing your intention - what is the intention behind your practice? Is it to get somewhere? Is it to achieve a certain state? Is that state something that you'd characterise as quiet, still, concentrated? Is that something that I'm chasing after, in however subtle a form?

One way you can look at the intention behind practicing Dharma, is to awaken. To be aware. To be fully and deeply aware of whatever you are experiencing, right now. Aware .. and even knowing it's nature.

As such .. there's no real reason to try to get rid of thoughts, or to make them subside, or to set up any sort of division between where you are and where you want to get. What is arising at that time can be the focus and intention of your practice. Can I fully experience what is here at this moment. Fully experience it?

You can have a support in this .. such as the breath, which is something that you can you can begin with ... throughout your practice. You can allow yourself to experience the breath. And rest in that experiencing. If you are then able, you can open the awareness to include what other sensations of the body, tactile sensations you are experiencing. Without moving away from experiencing the breath ... but opening to include more in your awareness. If you then lose the breath, then come back gently to it.

Should be you able to rest in experiencing fully the breath and the body sensations .. you can include visual sensations in your experience in your awareness. Not focussing down on any of them .. not concentrating .. but allowing them into your awareness ... together with the breath, and the tactile sensations. Again, if you lose the breath, gently come back to experiencing fully the breath, then open awareness to include tactile sensations .. and the visual sensations.

You can carry on this way and gradually open to more and more of your experience, your heard sensations, taste, smell ... then asking 'what is going on at the emotional level' and experiencing that together with the rest. Then 'what is going on at the story level' .. and allowing thoughts to be fully experienced in awareness.

So gradually you move to deepen and open your awareness to *all* your experience at that moment. The breath is a support as it's where you begin with awareness of your experience, and where you return to each time you lose awareness.

You *will* lose awareness! It's the nature of things :-) .... so we don't really need to get too caught up in calling it names like 'distraction' .. and trying to get away from that happening. If you keep doing the practice, then over time you build up 'capacity'. With capacity, you gain the ability to rest the mind with whatever is there. It's a natural process, and one which you don't' have to fight. And one you don't have control over, as such. You can't force yourself to concentrate.

There are three aspects to our ability to hold whatever arises in our awareness, each of which you need:

- You have the 'motivation' to be aware.

- You have knowledge of 'techniques' for being aware, such as the above, and what you've been taught.

- Then, you just need to do it, and gradually, the third ingredient will build, that of 'capacity'.

With increased capacity, you will lose awareness less, and you will be able to be aware of thoughts without getting lost in them so often, and you will most likely come back to awareness more quickly when you are out of awareness. You'll see that these three happen over different time-spans, and with differing degrees of control. Motivation is something which can be easily set (and lost) in the moment. Capacity, by contrast, is something which builds up slowly over time, and something we cannot 'decide' to do or have.

This sort of gentle, open, inclusive approach will tend to lead to less annoyance with being distracted, I find. And rather than trying to concentrate ... if your intention is to wake up ... to be able to rest in fully experiencing what is present, in each moment ... then awareness will naturally deepen, and knowing will naturally unfold, and you will find less tension and unease (suffering) in the path, as well what was already there!

I hope this description of the Mahamudra approach has been of some use ...

Reflections on Naropa - The Summary of Mahamudra

2008-12-02T12:03:00.037Z

Homage to the state of great bliss!
Concerning what is called Mahamudra
All things are your own mind.
Seeing objects as external is a mistaken concept;
Like a dream, they are empty of concreteness.

This mind, as well, is a mere movement of attention
That has no self-nature, being merely a gust of wind.
Empty of identity, like space.
All things, like space, are equal.

When speaking of 'Mahamudra'
It is not an entity that can be shown.
There the mind's suchness
Is itself the state of Mahamudra.

It is neither something to be corrected nor transformed,
But when anyone sees and realizes its nature
All that appears and exists is Mahamudra,
The great all-encompassing Dharmakaya.

Naturally and without contriving, allowed simply to be,
This unimagined Dharmakaya,
Letting it be without seeking is the meditation training.
But to meditate while seeking is deluded mind.

Just as with space and a magical display,
While neither cultivating nor not cultivating
How can you be separate and not separate!
This is a yogi's understanding.

All good deeds and harmful actions
Dissolve by simply knowing this nature.
The emotions are the great wisdom.
Like a jungle fire, they are the yogi's helpers.

How can there be staying or going?
What meditation is there by fleeing to a hermitage?
Without understanding this, all possible means
Never bring more than temporary liberation.

When understanding this nature, what is there to bind you?
While being undistracted from its continuity,
There is neither a composed nor an uncomposed state
To be cultivated or corrected with a remedy.

It is not made out of anything
Experience self-liberated is dharmadhatu.
Thinking self-liberated is great wisdom,
Non-dual equality is dharmakaya.

Like the continuous flow of a great river,
Whatever you do is meaningful,
This is the eternal awakened state,
The great bliss, leaving no place for samsara.

All things are empty of their own identities.
This concept fixed on emptiness has dissolved in itself.
Free of concept, holding nothing in mind,
Is in itself the path of the Buddhas.

For the most fortunate ones,
I have made these concise words of heartfelt advice.
Through this, may every single sentient being
Be established in Mahamudra.

This was given orally by the great pandita Naropa to Marpa at Pullahari.
(Translated by Erik Pema Kunsang.
Published in Songs of Naropa: Commentaries on Songs of Realization, by Thrangu Rinpoche (Rangjung Yeshe Publications, 1997).

Homage to the state of great bliss!
Concerning what is called Mahamudra
All things are your own mind.
Seeing objects as external is a mistaken concept;
Like a dream, they are empty of concreteness.

What is our life? What does it consist of?

Thoughts, feelings and sensations. That's it. All of what we think of as life, our relationships, our work, our practice, our hopes and fears, our body, our sense of self, our children, our car, our iPod, etc - it's thoughts - stories that pass through experience - it's feelings - it's what going on emotionally, and it's sensations - it's sensory sensations of hearing, seeing, tasting, smelling and touching ... that is our life. Life is experience. Life is mind. There isn't any world out there we can touch directly.

Yet we constantly project the display of mind into solid stuff that is actually out there. When we look, when we know .... we see that life has no more substance than a dream. As each appearance is examined ... we see that it is empty of substance .. where is it, we cannot say. What is it, we cannot say. Where did it come from, we cannot say. It's mysterious. It's undefinable. It's like a mirage, like a dream, without substance.

It's all mind. It's all experience.

This is the nature of the Mahamudra of perception.

This mind, as well, is a mere movement of attention
That has no self-nature, being merely a gust of wind.
Empty of identity, like space.
All things, like space, are equal.

When we turn attention to what is aware of all this experience ... what knows experience? What do we find? Nothing.

Though we have this sense that 'something' is aware of all these appearances which seem to arise and fall .... when we ask "what is aware?" .. and rest in the gap that follows this .... we do not see anything .. our knowing reveals .. nothing. Nothing - no-thing.

This is the nature of the Mahamudra of awareness.

When speaking of 'Mahamudra'
It is not an entity that can be shown.
There the mind's suchness
Is itself the state of Mahamudra.

When we rest in knowing, it's clear that there seems to be arisings, yet nothing can be found. These are both equally there, and yet not there. Nothing, and seemingly something. At one and the same time, we can know the inseparability of appearance and emptiness ... luminous emptiness.

There's nothing we can really say ... it's just like this ... empty, and yet at once apparent... suchness.

This is the nature of the Mahamudra of union.

These three were the view - the view of Mahamudra.

It is neither something to be corrected nor transformed,
But when anyone sees and realizes its nature
All that appears and exists is Mahamudra,
The great all-encompassing Dharmakaya.

Unlike in so many approaches to mediation, to practice, or to the spiritual path, mahamudra emphasises one of self-liberation .. where nothing needs to be done. We don't need to correct what we find. We don't need to strive after some special state. We don't need to be good, to be better, to be enlightened.

Just being aware, just resting in attention, with whatever is present, right now, just as it is. This resting in what is present, resting in knowing what is present, resting in knowing the nature of what is present right here and know. This takes care of the whole thing :-)

Do nothing, rest in awareness.

How things are is Dharmakaya. How things are is emptiness. How things are is unfindable, ungraspable, groundless, nameless, unborn ... this doesn't change with practice. It is simply how experience is. How mind is. Now, when you are awakened, when you are unawakened. It is the ground.

There is no experience that isn't this way. Nothing in samsara or nirvana.

This is the nature of the Mahamudra of the basic state.

Naturally and without contriving, allowed simply to be,
This unimagined Dharmakaya,
Letting it be without seeking is the meditation training.
But to meditate while seeking is deluded mind.

The path of Mahamudra consists of letting it be. Of letting go. Of simply being aware of what is, right now. In its nature. And resting there.

No effort. No effort to being aware, no effort to doing anything with what we are aware of. No correcting. No fabricating. No seeking to get away from, to have any other experience. No trying to attain, or to develop, or change.

Seeking takes you away from what is, here, right now. Only with what is, right here, can the nature of mind, of experience be known.

We don't need to conjure up this emptiness, this Dharmakaya. We don't need to be still, to have no thoughts or emotions, or only perfect ones. We just allow what is present to be .. to rest in awareness, rest in knowing ... and know.

This is the nature of the Mahamudra of realization.

Just as with space and a magical display,
While neither cultivating nor not cultivating
How can you be separate and not separate!
This is a yogi's understanding.

Am I separate from this display, these appearances, this awareness, this experience, this mind?

I'm not looking literally *at* experience. As if there is an 'I' over here, and 'experience' over there. I simply rest in knowing. If a sense of 'me' arises, it arises as an experience. One more experience. Subjectivity arises as an experience. If a sense of something 'out there' arises, it arises as an experience. One more experience. Sometimes there's this flicker of 'I-ness' which seems to be there .... knowing cannot find it. Only when we project a world out there, only when we project a me in here, only with this imaginary life of things, of inner me, of division ... only then is there a seeming separation. But with awareness, with knowing of thoughts, feelings and sensations .. no sense of separation is ever found. There's no me, you, things, inner, outer .... it's just ... mind, experience, call it what you will.

Just a magical display which appears in emptiness ... empty yet seemingly appearing at one and the same time. No separation can be found between this seeming dream, nor the nothingness of the dream.

This is the nature of the Mahamudra of indivisibility.

These three are meditation - the Mahamudra of meditation.

Clarifying the view and clarifying mediation, Naropa now clarifies conduct.

All good deeds and harmful actions
Dissolve by simply knowing this nature.
The emotions are the great wisdom.
Like a jungle fire, they are the yogi's helpers.

We don't need to change who we are, strive to be good, to be a better person, to be enlightened. Our nature is what it is, empty, unborn, regardless of whether clouds appear to obscure the sun or not. Action is what it is ... seeming appearances arising. Past action ... past deeds, karma ... dissolves like snow on hot stones in the knowing of knowing. In emptiness, in knowing emptiness, nothing disturbs us, however 'violent' the emotions, however 'difficult' the stuff that arises. It simply is what it is, it seems to arise, and in knowing, in resting in knowing, it seems to pass though and pass away. Yet what arose, what went? And where? Like a dream, these actions.

True enough, the stronger the emotion, the more energy is available for attention, *if* we can rest in it. Can we just rest in it, this raging sea? If we can, then awareness gains in energy, and knowing penetrates ever deeper. If we can't, we are blown off course, and start reacting to the emotion, to pushing and pulling.

Just know what is .... this mass of knotted emotion ... don't push it away, don't try to transform it, don't try to get past it, or through it, or even try to understand it. Just rest in the knowing .... and emotion will fuel the knowing like a raging fire.

If we have sufficient capacity to rest in awareness, then the more emotion, the greater the awareness, the greater the knowing .. it's all good :-)

This is the nature of the Mahamudra of self-liberation.

How can there be staying or going?
What meditation is there by fleeing to a hermitage?
Without understanding this, all possible means
Never bring more than temporary liberation.

You don't need to be in 'ideal conditions' to meditate or practice. You don't have to have a certain lifestyle. You don't have to be a monk or nun, single, on retreat, or any particular place in life to practice mahamudra.

You just need to be right were you are .... now .... right here .... and rest in the knowing of what is present. That's it. And ever time you realise you are not right there, then you open awareness out, and rest in it. And know mind, know experience right here, right now.

Otherwise you build dependency and attachment. Attachment to conditions, attachment to a way of life, attachment to being Buddhist.

Attachment brings suffering in its wake, not liberation.

You don't need to go anywhere to experience liberation. All dharmas self-liberate. Right here and now, just as it is, rest in knowing, in wakefulness, and know things as they are.

Bringing all of life to the path, all of life to practice ... wherever you are, whatever is there, resting in the knowing ...

Then you'll see that all experiences have the same taste .... the taste of emptiness, the taste of seeming appearances, the taste of inseparable appearance and emptiness. You don't have to go anywhere to know this. All experience is like this ... all possible experience is like this.

This is the nature of the Mahamudra of equal taste.

When understanding this nature, what is there to bind you?
While being undistracted from its continuity,
There is neither a composed nor an uncomposed state
To be cultivated or corrected with a remedy.

When I rest in this knowing, it's as if all the dreams of suffering are a mirage .. how could they possibly arise, how could I ever get lost in all this, imagining it's all real, in here and out there?

Nothing binds in this knowing, life flows, with great ease, actions take place spontaneously, we simply know what to do, and do it, at any moment, in any circumstance.

There is just this flow of ease ... and we simply do what needs to be done.

This is the nature of the Mahamudra of indivisibility.

And these three were conduct - the Mahamudra of conduct.

Goodness me ... what a lot of words!

Just rest in the knowing of what is here already.

:-)

Reflections on Niguma - Vajra Verses of Self-Liberating Mahamudra - Reflections

2008-11-18T14:10:00.029Z

The wisdom dakini known as Nigupta, illustrious Narotapa's sister, was a self-manifest yogini, a powerful lord bodhisattva on awakening's tenth stage, who received direct instruction from Conqueror Vajra Bearer. She sang these vajra verses of self-liberating Great Seal:

Nature of mind,
Wish-fulfilling jewel, to you I bow.

Wishing to attain perfect enlightenment,
Visualize your body clearly as the deity
To purify ordinary thoughts.
Develop a noble intention to help others
And pure devotion to your spiritual master.

Don't dwell on your spiritual master or the deity.
Don't bring anything to mind,
Be it real or imagined.
Rest uncontrived in the innate state.

Your own mind, uncontrived, is the body of ultimate enlightenment.
To remain undistracted within this is meditation's essential point.
Realize the great, boundless, expansive state.

Myriad thoughts of anger and desire
Propel you within the seas of existence.
Take the sharp sword of the unborn state
And cut through them to their lack of intrinsic nature.
When you cut a tree's root,
Its branches won't grow.

On a bright ocean,
Bubbles emerge then dissolve back into the water.
Likewise, thoughts are nothing but the nature of reality:
Don't regard them as faults. Relax.

When you have no clinging to what appears, what arises,
It frees itself within its own ground.

Appearances, sound, and phenomena are your own mind.
There are no phenomena apart from mind.
Mind is free from birth, cessation,
And formulation.

Those who know mind's nature
Enjoy the five senses' pleasures
But do not stray from the nature of reality.
On an island of gold,
You search in vain for earth and stones.

In the equanimity of the great absolute expanse,
There is no acceptance or rejection,
No states of meditation or postmeditation.

When you actualize that state,
It is spontaneously present,
Fulfilling beings' hopes
Like a wish-fulfilling jewel.

Persons of highest, middle and common levels of capability
Should learn this in stages suitable to their understanding.

----------------------------------------

from Timeless Rapture - Inspired verses of the Shangpa Masters.
compiled by Jamgon Kongtrul.
Translated by Ngawang Zangpo.

Selections from an alternative translation are here.

After preliminary instructions, of maintaining vajra pride, bodhicitta and guru devotion, Niguma's beautiful verses teach how to realise ordinary mind through mahamudra, through the non-meditation, and the self-liberation of all experiences.

Don't dwell on your spiritual master or the deity.
Don't bring anything to mind,
Be it real or imagined.
Rest contrived in the innate state.

There's no need to alter your mind in any way, to bring anything in particular or special to mind. You can recognise how mind or experience is, how it truly is, and how it appears, at any time, with any particular thought or appearance present, or none at all.

Your own mind, uncontrived, is the body of ultimate enlightenment.
To remain undistracted within this is meditation's essential point.
Realize the great, boundless, expansive state.

Experience, just as it is, at any time, *is* the Dharmakaya. It is empty, it cannot be found. When I'm aware and rest in that awareness in how experience is, it's clear it isn't anything. It isn't anywhere. It isn't anything that a concept can tie up or encapsulate. Knowing mind's nature, mind is ungraspable and indescribable. This groundlessness *is* what the notion of Dharmakaya points to.

It's relatively easy to know this, to experience this. But to rest in that knowing - *that* is much, much harder to do. To remain undistracted in this resting, without falling off into conceptual thought, or losing that groundlessness that one is resting in .... like balancing on the tip of a needle, for one of limited capacity as myself. It's also easy to get lost in 'understanding' this, rather than knowing it .... but what is the relation between understanding concepts and direct experience?

Just as it's impossible to say where experience is, where mind is, just so is it impossible to say that it's limited in any way. Experience appears to be boundless, without circumference, without limits. Empty, open and full is experience.

Myriad thoughts of anger and desire
Propel you within the seas of existence.
Take the sharp sword of the unborn state
And cut through them to their lack of intrinsic nature.
When you cut a tree's root,
Its branches won't grow.

The disturbing emotions create the six realms of existence for us. As they arise, so too does the corresponding realm, and so too do we appear to inhabit that realm, that aspect of samsaric conditioned existence, without either knowing or freedom.

As such as anger or desire arises, it's easy to lose knowing, to lose our resting in the knowing of the groundless, empty nature of experience, and to get sucked up into 'believing' in the solidity, the facticity, the reality of the emotion that arises. As we lose that knowing, then we get lost in a world of seemingly solidity that pushes and pulls away at us, driving us on and on, and giving rise to a sense of 'me' as well as 'other' or 'things'. These arise simultaneously with the loss of resting in knowing emptiness. As Niguma says, we are propelled on ... a lovely choice of word which describes so well how we are as if a runaway train, without little ability to either steer or stop our course.

Yet as we come to knowing, as we realise our error, and being groundlessness back into view, that simple recollection cuts all the roots of this delusion, and the six realms dissolve from whence they came .. like dreams they melt away in an instance. In meditation or postmeditation, when you rest in minds nature, it's almost impossible to imagine how disturbing emotions could ever arise again, or how you could ever ride the runaway train of samsaric realms again. (and yet you do, time and time again!).

On a bright ocean,
Bubbles emerge then dissolve back into the water.
Likewise, thoughts are nothing but the nature of reality:
Don't regard them as faults. Relax.

How strongly I tried to get away from thoughts in my early days of meditation, and attempt to quieten the mind through subduing this enemy! Myriad ways of working with thoughts, each more subtle than the last, but each with the same end in mind - to get rid of thoughts from my mind, and instill clarity, peacefulness and stillness.

It's funny that, how pushing a cork down into the water results in? ... results in the cork shooting up out of the waters surface ... reacting to the effort, and triggering a new cycle of activity.

Regarding thoughts as in any way problematic, or to be removed is counterproductive. Thoughts are just what they are, seeming arisings in mind, seeming appearances in experience. When aware of thoughts, what is known? They are empty in nature - you can't find a thought, you can't hold it, you can't pin it down. It comes from where? .. we can't say ... they go to where? we can't say. And whilst seeming there ... are they there? ... we can't say. Ungraspable and unfathomable are thoughts.

So thoughts reveal the nature of experience, when knowing is directed there. Just like anything else, their nature is the same. Not different from a still mind, not different from an 'enlightened' mind, not different from any other experience at all. Thoughts are empty. Know them, and you will not find them. Bizarre but true - the more clearly you know, the less that's there to actually know!

Why on earth would you want to get rid of them, when they are precisely what you are looking for?

One of the most direct ways I can know the nature of mind is to cause a thought to arise, and 'see' whether the nature of experience changes before, during or after the thought is there. Or to see where it comes from, abides at, and goes to. Etc. Resting in the response to those allows me to know that mind/experience doesn't change in nature whether thought is present or not. Empty, and groundless.

Of course, our habitual patterns tend toward grasping onto ideas. Many of us find them particularly alluring, and we buy into them as if they were 'fact', rather than thought. Then we get lost. But as we practice the entrancing quality of thoughts lessens, and we can more easily know them as just what they are, just another seeming appearance in mind.

As we come to know the nature of thoughts, we can ask "what is going on at the story level" ... and rest in the gap or response that arises. Knowing thoughts in this way, we see them as no other than mind's nature, as empty arisings.

As we because less fearful of thoughts through no longer seeing them as the enemy of meditation, we can relax, and rest in what is, whatever is, and know if for what it is.

When you have no clinging to what appears, what arises,
It frees itself within its own ground.

Without clinging to what arises, without pushing or pulling at it (with desire or ill-will), without attempting to apply any antidote to it, just allowing it to be, and resting in the knowing, thoughts naturally self-liberate, they are empty in nature, and mind remains empty throughout.

Appearances, sound, and phenomena are your own mind.
There are no phenomena apart from mind.
Mind is free from birth, cessation,
And formulation.

When an appearance arises, such as a sound, we can ask "where is this thought"? The knowing that arises in the resting after this question reveals the same answer as when we ask "where is mind"? Nowhere and yet everywhere.

I can't find a difference when knowing mind and knowing thought. I can't find a difference when knowing 'awareness' and knowing 'what it is that awareness holds'. When I ask "what is this"? ..... and direct knowing towards awareness itself ..... that is, when I know 'mind' in Niguma's teaching .... and also when I ask "what is known by awareness?" when I direct awareness towards whatever seems to be known or held by awareness ... I can't find anything that would allow me to say 'these are different.

There's different flavours to directing one's attention to awareness or to what seems to arise in awareness .... they seem to appeal to me at different times, and keep practice fresh. But when I know either .... inseparable is the only way I can describe what is revealed.

When I rest in experience, it's clear that experience is what there is. No phenomena are known to mind beyond itself. There's nothing out there, and there's nothing in here. There's nothing other than the endless unfolding of experience, nothing other than mind itself. It's not saying that nothing exists outside of 'my' mind. It's simply that I know nothing of anything other than experience. How could I? Nothing I know is untouched by awareness. Nothing is known 'before' it touches experience or awareness or mind. There is nothing beyond experience that can be known. The great completeness. Innocence

When "where do appearances (of sight, sound, pressure, etc) arise from"? And where do they go to? Where are they when they are arisen? Do these 'things' actually happen at all? Mind's nature remains the same, and untouched by all of this seeming display. Not a jot more, or less, better or worse is the nature of experience, regardless of whatever seems to arise.

Those who know mind's nature
Enjoy the five senses' pleasures
But do not stray from the nature of reality.
On an island of gold,
You search in vain for earth and stones.

No longer either caught up in pushing/pulling, in Samsara's game ... nor indeed caught up in trying to change things, trying to apply antidotes, trying to get somewhere in meditation, trying to make things better, in hopes or fears .... no longer caught up in all this .... one can simply abide in what is ... know if for what it is ... and enjoy the magician's display ... the dance of luminosity ... and smile :-)

Why try to change mind, when it is 'perfect' as it is? Why look for rocks and stones of ideas of perfection, when knowing reveals the great completeness/perfection, right here and now, wherever that is?

In the equanimity of the great absolute expanse,
There is no acceptance or rejection,
No states of meditation or postmeditation.

You don't need to do anything at all ... just relax and rest in mind's nature. You don't need to change anything, to get anywhere ... all goals are empty .... just rest .. and what needs to be done is revealed each moment ... and actions take place, effortlessly, without doing, without a doer.

When you actualize that state,
It is spontaneously present,
Fulfilling beings' hopes
Like a wish-fulfilling jewel.

Should I ever remain resting in wakefulness, rather than slipping off the resting, then no doubt activities will flow forth, as the teachings say .... and Enlightened activity will pervade the ten directions!

Persons of highest, middle and common levels of capability
Should learn this in stages suitable to their understanding.

Dimwits such as I .... build capacity to do nothing ... rest, slip away, come back, rest again ... slip away. Knowing is timeless, awareness is timeless ... coming back to it ... you've never been aware .. stringing a thread of beads, of beads that are not discrete or other than infinity ....

such as it is ... is how it is ... awareness opens .... and resting in this allows knowing to deepen.

What does it reveal ... nothing other than what was there all along.

The taste of grapes, the sight of mountains ... the discordant sound of car engines ... just what they are ... complete, and none other than empty, lucid, and unhindered ...

"May Niguma's heart words illuminate the hearts of all beings ... and the unborn awareness bring great peace to all"

Nobody is running this show

2008-11-12T10:19:00.007Z

One thing that's been coming into view lately in meditation is how my common sense notions that 'I' am somehow taking the decisions and choices and thereby the active agent of my life is not actually backed up by experience.

My conventional notion is that, for example, when I decide to switch my focus in meditation, say, to being aware of my physical sensations, rather than what is going on at the 'story' level, that it's somehow 'me' that is taking that decision, and that it's the result of some sort of continuity of purpose, which is what allows me to have a general aim to the meditation, and that somehow that carries through whatever is coming and going in appearances.

Knowing reveals something quite different.

I cannot find any 'me' that resides throughout the mediation, and which is making those decisions. Any sense of 'me' that does arise is momentary, and not continuous. So it's just another arising of appearances, like any other, rather than a glimpse into something deep and hidden, and lurking 'behind' everything else.

Moreover, when I allow the process of 'choice' to come into awareness, the actual moments of choice themselves, what do I 'see'?

Well, I see nothing, can't find anything that corresponds to that at all. Choice takes place, quite clearly, yet no location for choice is revealed to awareness, neither location in time, nor in place. It seems to happen, yet it's as if it's a living dream .... it's not happening at all when I turn knowing directly 'towards' it.

"where is this choice" .... I might ask ... and rest in the response - the opening that follows this question, not any answer, any rush to conceptualise or answer or fill that gap or opening with understanding, but just resting in the opening there .... resting in that opening and then taking a choice, doing, acting, creating karma through exercising will .... nothing is there, nothing is revealed, nothing whatsoever is findable .. and yet ... the action occurs.

So where is the agent in all these empty arisings, this luminous emptiness?

When awareness knows, it's clear that there isn't really any agent, no agency. These seeming actions occur, these appearances of action take place, yet nobody is really bringing them about. Similarly, when I don't act, when I decide to act, then stop that and don't follow through on that .... there isn't really an agent which doesn't act. The not acting takes place without 'me'. Not only is there no 'me' there with the doing and deciding not to do, but there's no action or non-action either. Nothing transpires, and nothing is guiding this action.

Woh! .... to my common sense view of myself, my ability to guide my life, to make choices, to direct my life in a way that seems valuable and meaningful is one of my most treasured abilities.

But actually, I'm not running this show at all!

Stuff seems to take place, and choices seem to be made, which attempt to guide my life in useful directions.

Yet knowing reveals nobody there, as well as nothing happening.

There's nobody home.

There's nobody in charge.

The lights are indeed on, yet nobody is home!

Mahamudra has indeed taken 'me' to a strange land, where everything I used to 'know' is no longer true, and what I now actually know is ... well .... nothing! .... but nothing which is truly known, rather than a whole bunch of something which I believed in and thought that I actually knew.

How do I actually take a decision, or act? Where does this take place? What makes it happen, at that time, that place?

Hard to see is this 'acting' (to paraphrase Yoda) - actually, not hard, but impossible thus far.

Actions seem as though they well up, from where? no-where. For what reason? It's hard to say. Most assuredly, it doesn't emanate from any 'me' or locus which is somehow directing this show.

Actorless and actionless.

Autumn Haiku

2008-09-25T06:23:00.001Z

Sitting in meditation today,
After the Autumn rain;
The smell of wet leaves lingers.

My breath don't live here no more

2008-08-28T13:36:00.009Z

I've been reflecting more on my experience of Mahamudra Shamatha ... resting with the breath.

Continuing from where I got to in my last post ... the breath isn't anywhere ... and it's not a thing. There is no breath as such, nor is it in a particular place. So how do I rest on it, if there isn't a locatable 'it', as it were.

One of the things I've been noticing in particular, is that there is no 'place' or dimension in my meditation. When I visualise Machig Labdron on a lotus above my head, I have a sense of that .... but actually, there isn't any above at all in experience, in mind. Whilst it's true that to a certain extent I can sense things as being spacially in relation to each other .... there's no absolute or real sense of up or down to be found, or any other dimension. Dimension doesn't apply.

Similarly with the breath ... where is the breath? Is it a sensation in the abdomen. Is it a sensation in the nostril. Is it a sense of movement in the chest. In a way, it's all of these and none.

The breath isn't there in the sense of perceiving it directly. All I can do it perceive various sensations in the body. And they give a clue that the breath was 'passing by' at that point. It was 'there' ... it was 'here'. And then what do I do? .. I string all those disparate sensations together, and call that 'the breath'. I say conceptually, that these are all 'breath' ... and other sensations aren't. So this is the 'breath'.

Ok .. you say .. but actually ... most of the time, those sensations are not there. Most of the time, whatever that is, when I'm resting on the breath in shamatha, there's no appearance or sensation arising. Most of the time I'm between breaths, or sensations. There's space, you could say. Or emptiness. Well, most of the time, I'm kinda hanging around in that space, and waiting for the breath to show up. I'm hanging around, perhaps where I suspect my next sensation around the nostril will be .. for sensations, which indicate that the breath is there.

But how do I hang around in the area of the nostril? Where is this? Spacially? There's no place, or dimension in mind, in experience, only that which I impute. So I'm hanging around .. my awareness is open, and resting .. some'where' .. but where? Somehow I'm hanging in awareness .. and somehow, I'm resting somewhere ... where I think that the breath will reappear, rather than somewhere else ...

and yet I'm not, because I'm just resting .....

and wherever the breath appears, that's where my awareness is, and rests.

However, then it's not resting on a particular sensation, or set of sensations, like 'nostril' ... but wherever the breath shows up ....

I suspect that's why I've got less shamatha and more vipassana in this nowadays, as I can't really switch off the knowing aspect, which knows things as they appear, and knows things as they really are ... or at least, knows these two to some degree.

Can't really just switch that off .... and somehow just rest on a particular object .... and become absorbed in that object .... as nothing is so solid anymore ....

Seems like the 'knowing' aspect is there, and doesn't wanna be turned off!

hmm ... random thoughts on where my breath went

Where did my breath go?

2008-07-23T07:27:00.005Z

I've noticed a change in my meditation lately. After quite a period of formless mahamudra meditation, I've recently been practicing Shamatha with the breath as the focus.

But, funny thing, I can't really find the breath to focus on.

It's pretty much there when I start ... a sense of it popping up here and there, as my awareness begins to stabilise. I see it here, I see it there! .... and gradually the breath and awareness settle around each other, as it were.

Yet as my mind settles, the breath gradually goes out of view. As my mind settles, then I know more clearly, and the breath ceases to be a 'thing' which I can focus on. Instead of this 'thing' called the breath, which one might assume to be pretty continuous, and solid, a process with continuity, as it were ... there's .... well, what is there?

There are sensations, physical sensations, as the breath touches parts of the body - the lungs, the nose, etc, and leaves a sensation there. I pick these up. At other times there's a sense of energy, not clearly physical, which I am somehow 'associating' with the breath, though of that I can't be sure. It's just that they arise where the breath 'ought' to be, if you see what I mean?

At other times, what is there? There's a constellation of something, not sure what you'd call it .... maybe a vague cloud of vibrations, pulses, shimmerings, which again I'd collate all that together, and assume it to be breath.

Actually, there's no 'thing' there which is the 'breath'. There's shimmerings and appearances, and I have to somehow string that together, bunch it up and package it, and call that 'breath'. But that is not what I am aware of. I'm aware of a bunch of ever changing and ever varied stuff, which doesn't happen in a particular place, such as the nostrils, or the abdomen. It happens 'somewhere' ... well, nowhere really, it just happens, as a location? Nope. No location.

It's not at a particular place. It's not a particular 'thing', with continuity. It's actually a dance of appearances, which I have to almost cobble together and call it my breath.

So what's the issue with shamatha then?

Well, it's actually hard to settle the mind on this after a certain point, as there isn't really an 'object' to settle around at all. There's no one 'thing' which to keep the awareness resting on .... so this isn't a central point which to grasp onto, or focus down on, or keep hold off like I did in years gone by.

There's just this shimmering, and I can't really find it!

So what to do then? I'm kinda used to formless meditation at present, where there is no object of meditation, where I just rest in awareness, where there is resting, and bringing out of the knowing aspect, of clarity. But what that resting, knowing mind rests/knows is whatever appears, and whatever 'actually is' at that moment, which varies continuously.

Now, I'm trying to find an 'object' to rest the mind on, and I'm kinda struggling to find it.

So ... interesting to see how this plays out. How will this develop .... at present I've no idea, which is cool :-)

Reflections on Li Po - The birds have vanished into the sky

2008-07-22T08:07:00.008Z

The birds have vanished into the sky,
and now the last cloud drains away.

We sit together, the mountain and me,
until only the mountain remains.

from Endless River: Li Po and Tu Fu: A Friendship in Poetry,
Translated by Sam Hami.

This is so evocative. A truly beautiful image, of Li Po sitting *with* the mountain, together, and in stillness, until only awareness of mountain remains.

It's interesting the sense of time here, as Li Po sits for some time, as the birds fly away, the clouds drain away. Quite some time must pass, and eventually, Li Po's sense of self fades away ....

All the transient appearances are symbolised here (birds and clouds which pass across the sky) as gradually dissolving, until how things actually are (symbolised by the mountain) is seen as it is.

Perhaps more than this metaphor for how things are, what strikes me is the sheer beauty of Li Po's evocation of the process and path, of seeing things as they are ... yet utterly opening to what appears to mind .... relative and ultimate, luminous emptiness ....

Money can't buy you everything

2008-07-21T07:57:00.004Z

I was driving into work today, and suddenly run into a traffic jam. We inched forward, and eventually I could see cars signalling to pull across into the right hand land. Clearly there's a car ahead, probably an accident, I thought. When I got alongside it was a Porche, with the driver down on his hands and knees, wheel off, and looking under his car. The car was parked half across the lane, with cars trying to get around him and his stricken vehicle.

Through my mind passed the thought - "doesn't matter how much money you have, you can't buy 'luck' .... you can't ensure that everything will go smoothly in life, no suffering, nothing guaranteed to break down, etc, etc". All fair enough, you might think.

And yet, in the back of my mind, as it were, I felt a quiet sense of satisfaction, that someone with tons of money had been 'brought down' by life, and that somehow I felt better as a result of his suffering.

Not the most noble of thoughts, I'm sure you'll agree. Interesting finding that little gem lurking in the shadows, hidden pretty much from view by my more 'Dharmic' reflection on how none of the things people go after in life as 'refuges' would keep you away from impermanence or uncertainty.

Interesting ... and one which made me smile, in a way.

Why on earth would one get a sense of satisfaction out of another's sufferings?

What a strange thing. Hmm .... one to watch as it arises next time, to perhaps see a little more clearly how such a thing works ...?????

Reflections on Rumi - Silence

2008-07-13T18:08:00.006Z

This silence, this moment, every moment, if it's genuinely inside you, brings what you need. There's nothing to believe. Only when I stopped believing in myself did I come into this beauty. Sit quietly, and listen for a voice that will say, 'Be more silent.' Die and be quiet. Quietness is the surest sign that you've died. Your old life was a frantic running from silence. Move outside the tangle of fear-thinking. Live in silence.

Rumi

So Beautiful. Death and Silence.

Nothing whatsoever to add :-)

Reflections on Milarepa - The Song of Distinguishing the Four Yogas

2008-07-10T08:14:00.012Z

I bow down at the feet of the supreme lama!

It’s the mind fixated on objects that causes samsara.
If you recognize as spontaneous
The luminous self-awareness, free of fixation,
You’ll taste the fruit of the first yoga, one-pointedness.

Some talk and talk about union, yet their meditation is all conceptual,
They talk and talk about cause and effect, yet their actions are flawed,
Such petty, deluded meditations
Have no place in the yoga of one-pointedness.

Luminous mind itself, free of fixation,
Is naturally blissful, without constructs.
If you recognize your very essence to be as clear as space,
You’ll taste the fruit of the second yoga, simplicity.

Some talk and talk about “no elaboration,” but they elaborate plenty,
They talk and talk about the “inexpressible,” but they’ve got plenty of terminology.
Such self-obsessed meditations
Have no place in the yoga of simplicity.

In the dharma body, appearance and emptiness are not two,
Samsara and nirvana are experienced as one.
If you know the Buddha and sentient beings to have the same identity,
As many have said: that’s definitely the third yoga, one-taste.

Some talk and talk about “oneness,” but they still want to make a point.
Such hazy confusion
Has no place in the yoga of one-taste.

Conceptual thoughts are in nature great awareness;
Cause and effect are non-dual, spontaneous.
They’re the three bodies,
And knowing this is the fruit of the fourth yoga, non-meditation.

Some talk and talk about non-meditation, but how active their mind is!
They talk and talk about “clear light,” but how thick their meditation is!
Such platitudes
Have no place in the yoga of non-meditation.

“Oh, what wonderful advice!” exclaimed the yogi from Gutang.

Translated by Nicole Riggs.
from 'Milarepa: Songs on the Spot.'

"It’s the mind fixated on objects that causes samsara.
If you recognize as spontaneous
The luminous self-awareness, free of fixation,
You’ll taste the fruit of the first yoga, one-pointedness."
- It's so easy to mistake experience for fact. The difference is in some ways vast between 'seeing' the world as solid stuff 'out there' and us as solid and 'in here'. Or just recognising appearances as shimmering mirages, dream-like appearances, that dance and play, yet have no enduring existence of them own which is worth grasping onto and giving over our life to their control.

It's interesting how in days gone past I'd view Shamatha as primarily about honing down on an object - concentration, which somehow equated to a narrowing of focus. Now, I guess I see it more as a matter of opening out awareness, allowing some 'thing' to come into view, and allowing 'view' to open - whatever awareness illuminates - well, that is empty yet apparent .... so instead of narrowing down onto a semi-solid object, I'm now mixing awareness with appearances, and emptiness, which doesn't have the same sense of focussing down.

So you could say that my Shamatha has the flavour of Vipassana. Mixed. As the Dorje Chang Thung prayer stanza on Shamatha says:

As is taught, unwavering attention is the body of meditation;
whatever arises is the fresh nature of thought.
To the meditator who rests there in naturalness,
grant your blessing that meditation be free from intellectualization.

What's interesting there is that the meditator is urged to rest in 'naturalness', and what arises to minds eye, as it were, is 'the fresh nature of thought'. Well, that isn't a seemingly solid object being fixated upon, but more the seeing at one and the same time of things as they truly are, and as they appear - this as the basis of Shamatha.

This is the basis of the First Yoga, the Yoga of One-Pointedness.

"Luminous mind itself, free of fixation,
Is naturally blissful, without constructs.
If you recognize your very essence to be as clear as space,
You’ll taste the fruit of the second yoga, simplicity."
- I remember long ago on a retreat at Amaravati, the Theravadan monastery in the UK, being taught that we are really caught up in the content of our experience and little interested in the form of experience, and that this
change of inclination is what facilitates the arising of insight and thereby liberation.

Similarly from a Mahamudra approach, creating an interest in the nature of experience and not just attaching to what arises in experience is a profoundly useful change of orientation. Seeing that all appearances are empty, all thoughts are empty, and that that which seems to experience thoughts and appearances is also empty - this changes the way we experience, and lessens our grasping onto experience. As such, mind itself reveals itself as blissful in and of itself, and thereby again lessens are need to chase after pleasurable experiences. Though appearances seem to arise, they are no longer experienced as solid and objectively given, but reveal themselves to be dreamlike in essence - open, illusive and utterly groundless. As such, life becomes inherently simple, with no need to play the games of push and pull at experience, picking and choosing, endless conceptualising, and difficult to know what to do. The doer does what needs to be done, not-doing, just allowing action to arise from the resting, luminous mind.

This is the basis of the second Yoga, the Yoga of Simplicity.

Reflections on Maitripa - Essential Mahamudra Verses

2008-07-09T15:30:00.013Z

To innermost bliss, I pay homage!

Were I to explain Mahamudra, I would say—
All phenomena? Your own mind!
If you look outside for meaning, you'll get confused.
Phenomena are like a dream, empty of true nature,
And mind is merely the flux of awareness,
No self nature: just energy flow.
No true nature: just like the sky.
All phenomena are alike, sky-like.

That's Mahamudra, as we call it.
It doesn't have an identity to show;
For that reason, the nature of mind
Is itself the very state of Mahamudra
(Which is not made up, and does not change).
If you realize this basic reality
You recognize all that comes up, all that goes on,
as Mahamudra,
The all-pervading dharma-body.

Rest in the true nature, free of fabrication.
Meditate without searching for dharma-body—
It is devoid of thought.
If your mind searches, your meditation will be confused.

Because it's like space, or like a magical show,
There is neither meditation or non-meditation,
How could you be separate or inseparable?
That's how a yogi sees it!

Then, aware of all good and bad stuff as the basic reality,
You become liberated.
Neurotic emotions are great awareness,
They're to a yogi as trees are to a fire—FUEL!

What are notions of going or staying?
Or, for that matter, "meditating" in solitude?
If you don't get this,
You free yourself only on the surface.

But if you do get it, what can ever fetter you?
Abide in an undistracted state.
Trying to adjust body and mind won't produce meditation.
Trying to apply techniques won't produce meditation either.

See, nothing is ultimately established.
Know what appears to have no intrinsic nature.
Appearances perceived: reality's realm, self-liberated.
Thought that perceives: spacious awareness, self-liberated.
Non-duality, sameness [of perceiver and perceived]: the dharma-body.

Like a wide stream flowing non-stop,
Whatever the phase, it has meaning
And is forever the awakened state—
Great bliss without samsaric reference.

All phenomena are empty of intrinsic nature
And the mind that clings to emptiness dissolves in its own ground.
Freedom from conceptual activity
Is the path of all the Buddhas.

I've put together these lines
That they may last for aeons to come.
By this virtue, may all beings without exception
Abide in the great state of Mahamudra.

Colophon
--------

This was Maitripa's Essential Mahamudra Instruction (in Tibetan: Phyag rgya chen po tshig bsdus pa), received from Maitripa himself and translated by the Tibetan translator Marpa Chökyi Lodrö.

© Nicole Riggs 1999.
-------------------

I've long had this very soft spot for Maitripa. Seems like somehow how teachings resonate through me more readily than Naropa's, which more often feature in the lineage figures of the Karma Kagyu. Though several streams are acknowledged, the one that passes through Tilopa, Naropa, Marpa, Milarepa, Gampopa etc seems the one usually featured stage front. Yet Saraha and Maitripa are in the mix too ... and in some ways for me are especially potent as they have the emphasis on ease, on self-liberation, on essence, and on letting go which I see most readily in Tilopa amongst the more common lineage.

Maybe it's because my path has often been one marked by struggle that this ease appeals so deeply to me? Not that I'm just wishful thinking, and 'choosing' it somehow as it's how I would like things to be, in distinction to how I experience things to be.

No, it's more of the nature of recognising that there is this other route, one marked more by ease and letting go rather than conflict and heroic effort, and that this other route is opening out for me at this time in particular, as something seems ripe and ready.

"the mind that clings to emptiness dissolves in its own ground" is especially potent - the utter groundlessness of experience, nothing to cling onto, nothing to hold onto, nothing to stand on ... not even emptiness ... which is empty in and of itself. It's not as if we see through appearances, and then find something deeper, something behind them, something somehow more 'real' than them. Emptiness isn't a thing in itself, something we can attach to ... it's the utter groundlessness of all experience, which isn't exempt from groundlessness itself! .. you will not find this groundlessness anywhere, so don't try to cling to it. The abyss of emptiness, this was called once.

"I've put together these lines
That they may last for aeons to come."
- is there any possible way to convey how blessed I am, and any other being with interest in this, to have these precious teachings in the palms of my hands? There are no words adequate to express my gratitude.

How extraordinary that these teachings have not only survived the ages and reached 21st century 'me' ... but that they seem to retain the extraordinary potency which survives untouched .. as experience never differs, but mere appearances in their mirage-like display.

Reflections on Milarepa - Song of Six Essential Points

2008-07-08T14:41:00.015Z

Mental projections way outnumber the dust motes you see in the sunlight;
A great yogi knows what appears for what it is.

At bottom, the nature of things isn’t a product of causes, nor of conditions
A great yogi cuts to the core of the issue.

Even a hundred men with spears couldn’t stop the thought-bubbles of consciousness;
A great yogi knows not to get hung up on them.

You can’t lock up the flow of mind in an iron box;
A great yogi knows mind to be intrinsically empty.

Wisdom gods and goddesses don’t say no to sensory pleasures;
A great yogi knows this full well.

The Buddha’s own hands couldn’t block the appearance of objects to the consciousness;
A great yogi knows there is no object behind the appearance.

Translated by Nicole Riggs.
from 'Milarepa: Songs on the Spot.'

"Mental projections way outnumber the dust motes you see in the sunlight;
A great yogi knows what appears for what it is."
How often do I not know appearances for what they are? How much easier it is to know them as mere appearances, the magical display of mind whilst meditating? How much harder to know this whilst in between meditations (post meditation)? Clearly I only have experience, not realisation, otherwise what is so very clear in meditation would persist more outside of it. There's certainly spaciousness there rather than solidity, but when anger arises on occasion, it all goes very solid in comparison.

Interestingly, I noted the other day that I couldn't remember how old I was. It took me nearly 5 minutes to work it out. It struck me that part of that is a very real loosening of conventions. I just don't seem to have quite such a strong hidden assumption around time and space as in yesteryear. Hmm .. that seems hard for others to understand, sometimes.

Funny thing about appearances - they are numberless, as Milarepa says. And conventionally we tend to want to understand them all, and follow them up, and arrange them just so. And yet, knowing the nature of one means you know the nature of them all, and fascination, no, entrancement by them all drops away ... little by little.

"At bottom, the nature of things isn’t a product of causes, nor of conditions
A great yogi cuts to the core of the issue."
I smile now at how I used to think my way round how causality relates to emptiness, how the unconditioned relates to the conditioned, how the so called mundane relates to the transcendental. How wonderful now to have some basis in experience to know these things. Not realisation, but some experience, so that thought no longer proliferates around these notions, and I can glimpse unfabricated experience as it appears, and how it truly is.

"Even a hundred men with spears couldn’t stop the thought-bubbles of consciousness;
A great yogi knows not to get hung up on them."
I used to try to push thoughts and emotions away. After that, I used to apply antidotes to them. Then I tried to transform them. Now, they just self-liberate, and I have to do .... nothing! How wonderful to let go. How wonderful the simplicity. How wonderful to let go, just a little, of trying to get somewhere, and to be, just a little right where I am, right here and now!

"You can’t lock up the flow of mind in an iron box;
A great yogi knows mind to be intrinsically empty."
Unobstructed are thoughts and appearances, which appear as they wish, and disappear again as they choose. Empty is the mind through which they appear to appear, yet nowhere can this mind be found, and nowhere can these appearances be found. You can't stop thoughts coming. In fact, letting go of trying allows them to subside all of themselves. The mind settles when no effort is made to calm it down. Just rest the mind in its own nature, and flow and stillness, just what they are ... are just what they are ...

"Wisdom gods and goddesses don’t say no to sensory pleasures;
A great yogi knows this full well."
Heheheheh .... I had to laugh at this. Why say 'no' to what self-liberates? Why push and pull at experience, when it's all same-taste? Well, because we are habituated to do so ... thinking it will bring us happiness. We think that happiness comes from sensory experience, from lining up an unending string of pleasurable experiences. Yet happiness comes from being at ease with however things are ... without the push and pull, allowing wisdom and compassion to flow forth!

"The Buddha’s own hands couldn’t block the appearance of objects to the consciousness;
A great yogi knows there is no object behind the appearance."
Block the appearances of objects to consciousness - you can't block them. But you can see appearances as what they are ... and know that there is no object behind or within them ... so empty illusions, magical projections, playing, flickering, touching us with their fragrance, yet nothing more than what they are .... so why get caught up with them ... why try to stop them ... why try to force them to not have what they didn't have in the first place?

Beautiful teaching ...

"may I come to know that which I only understand ... and may all beings be free from afflictions and struggle"

Working with Anxiety

2008-07-08T07:37:00.003Z

I thought I'd once again share a comment I made on another blog I've enjoyed greatly of late - Sacred West. We'd had a brief dialogue about a post on Stong Back, Soft Front, after which Sacred West was relating an experience from that morning:

Sacred West : "I awoke and thought of a stressful event to deal with this day, and I became anxious, I felt the pain of anxiety come into my gut and my stomach.

Then, thinking in terms of front and back I thought: pain just doesn’t belong here. And still in bed I moved this energy back into my spine and away from my organs, and it became strength, my resolve to stand up to the events of this day.

So, I don’t know, but the metaphor has its uses :)

What do you think about that?"

Chodpa : "Thanks for sharing that ...

what do I think? ... :-) ... I think that it’s great that this metaphor works for you, and affords you the means to work with conflicting emotions like anxiety, and find a means to transform that emotion into strength :-)

We all use different methods, right, whatever works and is appropriate at that time for where we are at?

For myself, when something like anxiety arises, then I simply allow it fully into awareness, as much as I’m able. Not pushing it away, not seeking to transform it, not in any way trying to grasp or reject it, but allowing awareness and what arises to mix fully.

When I’m fully and deeply aware of this arisen emotion, I tend to see it for what it is ... simply appearance, mirage-like appearance, devoid of any solidity, location or attributes in any way. It’s there, yet it’s not there. A dance of illusion.

Seeing thus, what seems to have arisen simply self-liberates ... it’s runs its course and melts away, without struggle, without conflict, without grasping or rejecting ... just what is, without the hooks into the psyche.

With that ... ease is neither won nor lost ... different flavours play and flicker, but what actually changes?

Well, that’s the way I go ... (or sometimes, try to go ;-)

One thing I’ve found very useful, is when an emotion arises, to see what is going on physically, emotionally, and at the level of storyline (or thought). Not analysing any of them, just allowing it fully into awareness, and watching if you like at all three levels. Doing thus takes all the ‘bite’ out of the emotion, allows us to see the way we habitually react to that which we don’t want to experience, and allows those patterns to dissolve in the sun of awareness, weakened, and less able to hold us in their habitual grip.

many thanks for your sharing ... and very best wishes to you!"

Mahamudra Inspiration

2008-07-07T13:45:00.019Z

One of the things that I really appreciate about Mahamudra is that there are instructions that seem to just 'hit the mark' for me. Sometimes I feel I need detailed instructions, and there are many of those.

There are primary texts such as those by Tilopa (The Six Words of Advice, The Ganges Mahamudra), Naropa (The View Concisely Put, A Summary of Mahamudra), Maitripa (Essential Mahamudra Verses), Milarepa, Saraha (A Song for the King), HH3 Karmapa Rangjung Dorje (Aspiration Prayer of Mahamudra), HH9 Karmapa, Wangchuk Dorje (Pointing Out the Dharmakaya, Eliminating the Darkness of Ignorance), or Dagpo Tashi Namgyal (Clarifying the Natural State, Moonbeams of Mahamudra), for example.

Then there are commentaries or instructions, such as those by Thrangu Rinpoche, Daniel Brown or Peter Barth at one end of the scale, as it were - the traditional end, to those by Ken McLeod which attempt to teach without recourse to 'mythic' language.

Thrangu Rinpoche's commentaries point the way like none other for me, being quite direct and very systematic. Ken McLeod's teachings have been a revelation this year, once again opening out the path with clarity and great skillfulness.

Sometimes though, the simple pith instructions are what I need, such as the famous lines by Tilopa:

Let go of what has passed.
Let go of what may come.
Let go of what is happening now.
Don't try to figure anything out.
Don't try to make anything happen.
Relax, right now, and rest.

Today, it was Dagpo Tashi Namgyal, whose texts leave me in awe, yet are entirely practical and directly realisable.

Elevate your experience and remain wide open like the sky.
Expand your mindfulness and remain pervasive like the earth.
Steady your attention and remain unshakable like a mountain.
Brighten your awareness and remain shining like a flame.
Clear your throughtfree wakefulness and remain lucid like a crystal.

The quote above comes from 'Clarifying the Natural State', and gives wonderful, poetic images with which to relax the mind into its natural state, and let go.

Without rigorous argument or great detail, these lines present images for the heart, which seduce it into letting go into simplicity. And yet, within those evocative lines are also contained precise instructions for Mahamudra meditation, just clothed in poetic colours, rather than colder, harder prose.

"May my mind always incline to realising Mahamudra.

May my mind learn to truly let go.

May my heart open to all beings' sufferings,

And may I find the path that leads all beings to liberation."

Starting from Experience and Starting from Thought

2008-07-03T18:19:00.006Z

I've recently discovered a blog called if you see the dhamma ... written by Joseiem, which I've really enjoyed reading, and commenting on. I thought I'd just lift a set of replies I posted to Joseiem's comments. I've used the title of this post to highlight what I'm trying to point at, not to characterise Joseiem's replies:

Hi again Josesiem :-)

A some observations ...

Josesiem : Even within Buddhism, as I’ve written before, there are massive conflicts and differences.

Chodpa : It is true at the level of conceptual formulations of the teachings, and methodology that there are massive differences within various Dharma traditions, but is there a difference in terms of fundamentals, realisations. or the result of following these varying paths? I see none personally. I can only suggest trying to be clear about what is view, what is method, and what is result, and then seeing if there is conflict.

Josesiem : all paths lead to the same peak and all fingers point to the same moon.”

Chodpa : how could we know this, unless we’ve travelled each and every one of those paths? To assert or deny otherwise would be a matter of belief - starting with an a priori idea, and then fitting experience into that.

Josesiem : the problem with the anti-representationalist, anti-realist, and nondualist schools of thought is that they are just another school of thought.”

Chodpa : if by this you mean the actual practice of Dharma, then I’d say ‘no, this isn’t the case’. They aren’t *just* another school of thought. What they provide are view and method. View is the attempt to conceptualise what is found as a result of following their methods to the end. As such, it’s not a belief set, but an attempt to provide a rough pointer to experience. The rest is method, the vital tools with which to walk the path. Those methods and view provided are only skillful means … don’t mistake them for conceptual elaborations, or philosophical positions!!!!

Josesiem : we can pretend that “ontology is not important” but there is an implied ontology in these theories.”

Chodpa : so????? There is a lot that might be elaborated from both view and method, but what of it? The Buddha was very clear that he taught the means to go beyond suffering and struggle. It’s fine to go elsewhere, indeed, anywhere we want from the central point of the Dharma, but perhaps it is of use to bear in mind what that central point is, and not lose sight of it.

Josesiem : “Emptiness is itself empty.” Which leaves what? Nothing. No, not even nothing. Nothing is still a something. It’s a perceived lack of something. This is where you find yourself beyond language in some kind of space vacuum. And I’d argue this not-nothing, not-something, non-thingy thingy is still a something. Perhaps I’m just dense, but you have to posit a something. You can’t escape ontology no matter how hard you try.”

Chodpa : Is this what the teachings on Shunyata are ‘about’? My experience says that when I meditate according to the teachings, then I find that the view of Shunyata is about as close as you can get conceptually to describing the nature of experience. That experience most certainly isn’t accurately described as ‘nothing’. No-thing might be closer ;-) You can posit all you like, but that has little to do with meditating and following the path, doesn’t it? It might be ‘interesting’ and it might satisfy curiosity, but does it actually liberate? Emptiness (as it’s sometimes translated) is a description *after* the event, as it were. It’s an attempt to provide a means to describe something that is to be experienced, here and now! It’s not a belief from which one then thinks, or analyses, or elaborates. It is in itself a description of unelaborated mind or experience!!! Again, you can elaborate from there back into dualistic thought, a ’something’ or a ‘nothing’ … but hey …

Josesiem : So, the unavoidable and inevitable question for everyone is: where will you place your faith?”

Chodpa : I’m right behind this one. In distinction to ‘belief’ .. if you will … where we start with an idea, and then proceed to map all our experience to fit that …. Buddha taught the means of using faith to open out into experience, and thereby to see experience for what it is, and so on. With faith, we gain the openness to what is, without immediately attempting to manipulate it. Without that, one cannot see it for how it is, and thereby the doors to transformation are closed. One starts with confidence in the teachings as a result of whatever experience you’ve had, and that then develops through the three levels of faith that the Buddha describes until the final flowering of faith is wisdom itself. From the deepest perspective, what the Buddhist has faith in is the three jewels - we can see directly in our experience how mind is open, expansive and ungraspable. This is the Buddha. We can see how mind is clear and lucid nevertheless (even though this clarity cannot be found) - this is Dharma. And we can experience mind as entirely unobstructed - this is Sangha. The three jewels are directly available to experience, to open-heartedness (faith) and as such are not a matter of belief. All else is subject to change and decay, whether belief, or what appears to the mind. Only these three ‘aspects of mind’ - the three jewels provide ’something’ that we can truly have faith in, as they are true refuges - they are always present, and always reliable.

once again, many thanks for your stimulating thoughts :-)

(more ramblings which hope to be of some use somewhere)

Chodpa

Reflections on The Melody of Wisdom : A Supplication to the Wisdom Dakini Niguma

2008-06-26T07:42:00.010Z

Vajra queen, mother of all buddhas,
Dark-brown woman wearing bone ornaments who flies through space,
You bestow supreme accomplishment on your fortunate disciples:
Noble Niguma, to you I pray.

You were born in the wonderful land of Kashmir,
In a sublime city
Known as Incomparable in the Land of Jambu,
Emanated through Madhyantika's blessing; to you I pray.

In the family circle
Of the pure Brahmin, Shantivarma,
Narotapa and you, the wisdom dakini, were brother and sister
Your karma ripened together like sun and moon; to you I pray.

You are the feminine form of true emptiness,
Sublime among all appearances, giving birth to all victorious buddhas.
Although you manifest in a worldly form,
You renounced any connection to existence through craving and grasping;
to you I pray.

During incalculable past lives, you reached the far shore
Of awakening's stages and paths.
Thus, in this life, you gained the inconceivable, perfect freedom of
self-manifest accomplishment.
Innate dakini, to you I pray.

You did not have to rely on exhausting training
When some advice from accomplished masters entered your ears,
You understood all teachings.
Great bliss of natural liberation, to you I pray.

Knowledge of one subject - the tantras' subtle, profound meaning led to your total liberation
And the flowering of your two forms of knowledge.
You saw directly and without obscuration the truth of the nature of reality.
Illustrious woman of accomplishment, to you I pray.

You bound your mind, eyes, and circulating energy within the expanse of
emptiness,
Permitting you to see in the central channel the [empty] forms created
by the spring vital essence.
Vajra illusory reflections, such as smoke, developed together.
You completed the branch of familiarization; to you I pray.

You used your breath to block the dark circulating energies and made
them descend to your belly.
You joined the vitality and descending energies equally at the six
energy centers,
Blocking the movement of the six elements' sun and moon.
You completed the branch of proximate accomplishment; to you I pray.

You transcended the three seals to reach incomparable Great Seal (Mahamudra).
The innate light of its unchanging, coemergent bliss
Created your ten-faceted illusory body, replete with all powers.
You completed the branch of accomplishment - to you I pray.

You blocked the twenty-one thousand six hundred circulating energies and
attained that many forms of changeless bliss.
At the crown of your head, the mind of awakening became stable,
And you traversed awakening's stages in an instant.
You completed the branch of great accomplishment; to you I pray.

Through engaging in conduct that is enlightenment's direct cause,
You enjoyed many pleasures and were nurtured spiritually by Buddha Vajra
Bearer.
Your fortune equaled his - your body of training's integral union
Works for beings whose numbers equal space; to you I pray.

You saw directly all phenomena without obscuration
And opened inconceivable millions of gates to meditative states.
You master the secret treasury of all victorious ones.
Consort of all buddhas, to you I pray.

Body of great bliss, emptiness and compassion inseparable,
Manifestation of blissful buddhas, sovereign of common and supreme
accomplishment,
Powerful bodhisattva on awakening's tenth stage, glorious guide for beings,
Wearer of Bone Ornaments, to you I pray.

Sentient beings, our venerable mothers, wander along the wheel of life
In endless and fathomless seas of suffering.
With your universal great compassion,
Lead them to a pure land of flourishing, uncontaminated bliss, I pray.

Nurture fortunate persons who have entered the path;
Pacify all adversity, hindrances, and obstacles;
Continually enhance our experience and realization;
And bless us with the completion of awakening's five paths and ten stages.

(A Garland of Udumvara Flowers, pp. 3a-4a, by Jamgon Kongtrul)

Excerpted from /Timeless Rapture/, by Ngawang Zangpo.

A second prayer of supplication to a Shangpa Kagyu lineage holder (prayer of supplication to Sukhasiddhi, this prayer to Niguma once again stirs a deep resonance in my heart. Though couched in deeply mythic language, unlocking the symbolism points directly into minds nature, and illuminates what is, simply is.

The lines:
"You are the feminine form of true emptiness,
Sublime among all appearances, giving birth to all victorious buddhas."
speaks a lot to meditation experience. So much seems encapsulated there. So much summarised so pithily (is that a word? .. it is now!). So much that can't really be said, just pointed to, by allusion, fingers pointing to the moon.

Once again:
"You did not have to rely on exhausting trainingó
When some advice from accomplished masters entered your ears,
You understood all teachings.
Great bliss of natural liberation, to you I pray."
How wonderful to read these lines, the ease of natural liberation, how different from the hard won struggle so often portrayed. Not that I want it easy, not that I want to project a notion that it *should* be easy ... just enjoying hearing of ease-won liberation, alongside the natural ease of the Mahamudra path of resting mind. How blessed I am to have found this path of no-struggle. How simple the path of self-liberating dharmas. One sees how unnecessary this creation of suffering or struggle is. How wonderful to find the path itself which is without struggle. Seeing the 'problem' of struggle, finding a path beyond that which itself doesn't involve 'struggle'. No longer at war with myself, trying to be something other that what I appeared to be. No longer trying to be somewhere else, not at peace with things. How deeply I pray that all beings find this ease, and allow the illusory chains of suffering to disappear like dew drops in the sun of awareness.

An extraordinary peon to accomplishments ... beyond my imagination, yet so very near.

Reflections on The Melody of Great Bliss : A Supplication to the Wisdom Dakini Sukhasiddhi

2008-06-19T11:12:00.019Z

Bestower of uncontaminated, coemergent bliss;
Radiant with the full splendor of sixteen-year-old youth;
Leader of every assembly of dakinis in the three locations
Venerable Accomplishment of Bliss [Sukhasiddhi], to you I pray.

You manifested in a pauper's home in Kashmir
And trained in realization on the path.
Having completed the force of faith and great compassion,
You diligently gave gifts without attachment; to you I pray.

Millions of eons ago, you perfected the cultivation of merit and wisdom
And the result of your training manifested.
The awakening of your karmic connections
Made you renounce home life; to you I pray.

In the land of Oddiyana, source of great mysteries,
Men were spiritual warriors; women, female warriors.
Just by your reaching the center of that gathering,
The power of your enlightened potential awakened; to you I pray.

You demonstrated the skillful means of illusory conduct as a vendor of delicious alcohol.
You gave twice-strained rice alcohol to a female adept.
This created a connection through faith
With a tantric practitioner in the forest; to you I pray.

Noble Virupa accepted you as his disciple
And gave you the full four empowerments into secret practice.
Instantly, your ripened karmic body of sixty-one years
Became that of a sixteen-year-old maiden; to you I pray.

Taking the inner path, you truly traversed in a single moment
The major vajra stages of awakening,
And you appeared in an uncontaminated, vajra rainbow body.
Powerful one of the celestial realms, to you I pray.

You became the manifest form of coemergent wisdom, Buddha Selfless One,
To remain until the end of cyclic existence.
You watch over the three realms' beings during the six periods of day and night.
Honored female buddha, to you I pray.

You manifestly bless those who pray to you
And lovingly watch over your children who preserve your lineage, never parting from them.
You bestow common and supreme accomplishment in a matter of months or years.
Powerful one of great compassion, to you I pray.

Vajra Yogini, perfection of transcendent knowledge,
You appear to help beings in a body that has form.
The exquisite flower of your body, which one never tires of seeing,
Blooms with the marks and signs of physical perfection; to you I pray.

In the Teaching's infinite gates, which have the nature of emptiness,
You speak according to beings' dispositions.
Your speech, invincible sweet sound in every situation,
Flows imbued with the sixty tones of Brahma's voice; to you I pray.

Inseparable bliss and emptiness, the true vajra of space,
Pervades all animate and inanimate life.
Your sublime enlightened mind of luminous Great Seal
Is coemergent and uncontaminated; to you I pray.

Epitome of the qualities of freedom and maturity,
You have an inconceivable life.
Just hearing your voice inspires uncontaminated bliss.
Sublime wish-fulfilling jewel, to you I pray.

You unite in pleasure with all victors and bodhisattvas.
Your emanations reach the four elements' limits.
Like an excellent vase, a gem, or a wish-fulfilling tree,
Your enlightened activity is spontaneously present; to you I pray.

Your compassion knows no distance and embraces all equally.
You guide fortunate persons on the path to the celestial realms.
Your loving face wears the conscientious smile of compassion.
Friend to all beings, to you I pray.

To your child who preserves the lineage and who prays to you,
Show your loving face and joyfully grant me your supreme prophecy.
Bestow the empowerment of great vajra wisdom,
And bless me that I merge inseparably with you.

by Jamgon Kongtrul.

Excerpted from Timeless Rapture, by Ngawang Zangpo.

As always with these devotional poems, there's so little to add of any substance. What always strikes me is the beauty of the devotion, the sheer beauty in the heart that lets go in supplication, which opens to that which is possible, even that which seems beyond or impossible from our limited perspective.

Sukhasiddhi's story is inspiring in itself, with her ease of realisation a particular source of gentle encouragement. Not all masters seems to have to take the rough roller coaster ride to liberation!

Her images always seem to open something out deep within me, speaking to me in a way that words cannot. It's strange how some images do this, yet others speak of nothing. So easy to understand why beings grasp at 'explanations' such as karma and past lives to explain this. Why does this need explaining? Why not remain in the not-knowing, and just sit in the wonderment and blessedness?

Jamgon Kongtrul speaks so eloquently of the qualities that cannot be spoken. How marvellous it is to read the words of one who has realised. How utterly different it is to read the words of those of us who 'understand', but do not 'know'.

Profound thanks for the teachings, the lineage, the blessings of Sukhasiddhi and Jamgon Kongtrul, which resonate beyond time and space, and envelop me in their gentle uplift.

For someone like me trained in intellect, how liberating the open heart which inclines to devotion.

And how interesting the whole area of prayer .... of what this is, in its various manifestations.

Reflections on Ryokan - The Winds have Died

2008-05-28T10:58:00.005Z

The winds have died, but flowers go on falling;
birds call, but silence penetrates each song.

The Mystery! Unknowable, unlearnable.
The virtue of Kannon.

Ryokan

These incomparable words express so eloquently the mystery of inseparable emptiness and appearances.

Poignant indeed :-)

Reflections on Seongcheol - Snowflakes melting on Fire

2008-05-27T11:59:00.007Z

The great achievements of the world are but snowflakes melting on fire,
Accomplishments that move oceans are but dew disappearing in the glare of the sun,
Why live a dream in this ethereal life of dreams,
I forsake all to walk towards the great eternal truth.

Seongcheol
Korean Seon (Zen) Master - on becoming a monk.

I was just laughing to myself whilst meditating. I'd not get too much sleep last night from the pain, so was more 'vegetating' rather than meditating! Nevertheless, whilst working with the drowsiness and general dullness which advanced and retreated like waves, I suddenly remembered Seongcheol, and his example. He was well known for being able to not just keep awareness of minds nature throughout the day, continuously, but also throughout dreaming *and* deep sleep too.

And I can't maintain alertness for more than a few moments even in formal meditation posture!

I'm entirely in awe of this great master :-)

Reflections on Chinul - Pointing to your Original Mind

2008-05-26T10:31:00.023Z

Some reflections on a dialogue between Chinul (also known as Bojo, and Jinul), a 12th century Korean master and one of his students:

Question: In our case, what is this mind of void and calm, numinous awareness?

Chinul: What has just asked me this question is precisely your mind of void and calm, numinous awareness. Why not trace back its radiance rather than search for it outside? For your benefit I will now point straight to your original mind so that you can awaken to it. Clear your mind and listen to my words.

From morning to evening, throughout the twelve periods of the day, during all your actions and activities ... ultimately who is it that is able to perform all these actions? Speak! ... You should know that what is capable of seeing, hearing, moving and acting has to be your original mind: it is not your physical body. Furthermore, the four elements which make up the physical body are by nature void; they are like images in a mirror, or the moon's reflection in water. How can they be clear and constantly aware, always bright and never obscured - and, upon activation, be able to put into operation sublime functions as numerous as the sands of the Ganges? For this reason it is said, 'Drawing water and carrying firewood are spiritual powers and sublime functions.'

There are many points at which to enter the noumenon. I will indicate one approach which will allow you to return to the source ... Do you hear the sounds of that crow cawing and that magpie calling?

Student: Yes.

Chinul: Trace them back and listen to your hearing-nature. Do you hear any sounds?

Student: At that place, sounds and discriminations do not obtain.

Chinul: Marvellous! Marvellous! This is Avalokiteshvara's method for entering the noumenon. Let me ask you again. You said that sound and discriminations do not obtain at that place. But since they do not obtain, isn't the hearing-nature just empty space at such a time?

Student: Originally it is not empty. It is always bright and never obscured.

Chinul: What is this essence which is not empty?

Student: As it has no form or shape, words cannot describe it.

The Collected Works of Chinul

I thought I'd share some words about the inexpressible ... foolish being that I am ;-)

I was really struck when I read this dialogue yesterday as to how similar the pointing out instructions by the Korean Zen master Chinul were to the pointing out instructions of Mahamudra.

When Chinul asks the student to trace back mind's radiance, rather than search for it outside (in concepts or answers from the Master),he proceeds to give the pointing out instructions in a very clear and precise way. First he asks him to clear his mind and listen. It's so easy for us to jump to conceptual answers when we hear a teaching, or are asked a question. In Mahamudra meditation we can ask a question such as 'who am I?' and then 'listen' for the answer. Before the conceptual mind steps in, there's a spacious opening, as the conceptual mind lets go, and awareness 'holds' the question.

For the beginner, these questions just 'zap' the mind, as we have no idea at all what or who we are. Then there's the rush of thoughts that seek to fill the not knowing.

When we've had more experience with these things .. we don't rush to fill the gap ... we can sit in the unknowing ... sit with the lack of answer .... and sit in the opening.

Depending on our experience, we can sit in that opening for longer, with the mind clearer .. allowing us to see more clearly ..... and actually know what we see ... and not just try to understand it in thoughts and concepts.

"ultimately who is it that is able to perform all these actions?" ... when we look we see no-thing, no-one who is there 'behind' our actions. Even the 'I', the 'self' the sense of being 'someone' arises as an 'object' to awareness. It comes and goes, and is no more real or substantial than any other arising to mind.

"You should know that what is capable of seeing, hearing, moving and acting has to be your original mind: it is not your physical body." The physical body isn't there to us, directly and unmediated. Any experience we have that we ascribe to 'body' is simply arisings of perceptions in the play of mind. We never actually experience body as such ... only our dreamlike experience, some of which we separate out into 'body' and grasp onto it as real.

"Furthermore, the four elements which make up the physical body are by nature void; they are like images in a mirror, or the moon's reflection in water. How can they be clear and constantly aware, always bright and never obscured - and, upon activation, be able to put into operation sublime functions as numerous as the sands of the Ganges? For this reason it is said, 'Drawing water and carrying firewood are spiritual powers and sublime functions." The endlessly fascinating interplay of emptiness and appearances, of the apparent, and the ultimately true. How wondrous indeed that no-thing actually exists, and yet everything seems to arise, and carry out its own function perfectly! Somehow we'd think that for something to function, it must be real. It must truly exist. And yet, these mirages flit and flicker, yet dance their very own dance of the world, painting all colours on our experience and the world. Truly mysterious, ungraspable and wondrous indeed!

"There are many points at which to enter the noumenon. I will indicate one approach which will allow you to return to the source." Chunul gives an approach to working with mind, to allow the student to move away from grasping at appearances as if they were inherently real, and opening instead to how things really are. Chunul asks the student to listen to the birds singing:

"Chinul: Trace them back and listen to your hearing-nature. Do you hear any sounds?

Student: At that place, sounds and discriminations do not obtain."

When we let go of the entrancement of believing in 'objects' and just open to what really is, we don't find the solid separate 'things' which we believe exist. Instead, we find a magical display of fleeting appearances, all without substance. None have names, none have definite characteristics, and none have anything that we can call 'this' or 'that', 'it's here' or 'it's there', or even 'this exists' or 'this doesn't exist'. We have no idea at all what something 'is' in this sense. Just empty arisings.

"Chinul: You said that sound and discriminations do not obtain at that place. But since they do not obtain, isn't the hearing-nature just empty space at such a time?

Student: Originally it is not empty. It is always bright and never obscured."

Chinul asks whether because no-thing can be found, whether there is nothing at all. The abyss of nihilism as I believe Nagarjuna called it. The student clearly sees that this emptiness is full, and describes the luminosity of mind. Though no-thing can be found, experience is vivid and clear, blazing in clarity, full in its magical display. Awareness shines, whether the clouds of our ignorance and thoughts obscure it or not. Wakefulness is always present - how could it be otherwise? How could it be possible for our mind to grow quiet and experience this expansive knowingness were it not eternally awake?

"Chinul: What is this essence which is not empty?

Student: As it has no form or shape, words cannot describe it."

Asked to describe this luminosity, the student refuses to go where words cannot (unlike myself!!!!) and merely states that nothing definite can be said of that which illuminates the void. (the void - horrible term, but fitting here). Though emptiness is not nothingness, that which is other than nothingness is not a thing, nothing that can be pointed to with words.

How clear this experience that is describes from centuries ago, between two beings I've never met!

How crazy these idle ramblings, trying to put the horns on a rabbit, trying to describe the indescribable!

Adding Labels and Tags

2008-05-25T07:20:00.004Z

How fascinating it has been these last two days to go through this blog adding on labels or tags to each post, giving a signpost to what is contained within. It's been fascinating reading snippets of so many of these postings, seeing what I was doing, and more importantly, seeing how I was experiencing things throughout these years.

And fascinating indeed to see which labels come up most frequently in my posts. That clearly gives some indication of the notions that I am particularly interested in in my life - those things that I care about and wish to express here.

It's almost like a league-table of what my life is about! (the league table is over on the right side, if you wish to see)

As if a mirror has been held up, and suddenly revealed my life, in all its (in)glory!

Funny old thing, blogging ....

The Measure of a Life

2008-05-13T07:33:00.014Z

Did I love well?

Did I live fully?

Did I learn to let go?

- Jack Kornfield

I've recently been delving back into 'A Path with Heart' by Jack Kornfield after many years, and once again came across this lovely aphorism. He relates how when one is lying on your deathbed you are unlikely to be thinking 'did I stay late enough at work that night', or 'did I earn enough' .. but much more likely these three questions in the quotation.

Many, many times I've reflected on this, and come back to this fundamental point about life. It says so much about what we put our energy into, and whether that's really what we want our life to be about.

And much like Buddha's

"Cease to do evil,

do good,

purify the heart"

this most pithy aphorism contains so much in the way of guidelines to practice, encompassing the whole path.

Well, did I? Do I? Will I?

What a beautiful thing this journey is, bitter or sweet it appears to be .....

More Simplicity

2008-05-09T07:32:00.003Z

- following on from yesterday's reflection on the simple pleasure of sitting, just sitting - it struck me today how odd it is in a way that I can get so much joy from just looking at trees, the sky and the wind. I'd just finished meditating yesterday, and looked up and out at the trees. I was fascinated by how 'blue' the sky was, how verdant the green of the new leaves on the trees was, how wondrous the shapes that the leaves made against the sky, and how lovely the movement of the leaves and branches against the backdrop of the blue sky.

I had this sense of completeness, of needing nothing, and just content to be where I was, enjoying what was.

How odd? ... why odd? ... well, in a way, wouldn't most people think it really odd that I was sitting there, looking at trees with a funny smile on my face? Where was my cigarette, or chatter, or planning, or entertainment from ipods and other gadgets? What struck me in particular was that at that moment, I didn't need all these technological marvels that we've invented in order to give us pleasure. I didn't need entertainment from things that were complex, that I had to strive to buy, or which took a lot of work or conditions to acquire. All I needed at that moment was? ... well, not a lot really. Simple pleasure in being right where I was, in the present, fully open to what was around me, and within, or wherever any of that actually is.

Like the old adage of the person with the jewel on their person, who'd not known that they have this wealth there all the time, unbeknownst to them .... I felt a recognition today that contentment was right there - simply there all the time, should we want it. We don't actually need all that other stuff to make us feel good. Just open to what is, don't push and pull at it with want and don't want .. just open to the texture of what is there, fully, with an open heart, and right there and then, in whatever it is, anger, happiness, complexity, simplicity .... whatever it seems to be ... open to what is ... and it's all same taste, all one taste, all both wondrously apparent and beguiling, yet utterly empty and ineffable, and extraordinarily mysterious. How beautiful, however it is ....

simple things .... strange 'world' we inhabit .....

Simple Pleasure

2008-05-08T17:13:00.005Z

I've found myself experiencing some wonderment recently, at how pleasurable simply sitting still is, and doing absolutely nothing, (other than remaining in awareness).

Doing nothing?

How much of my life is caught up in doing? How much of it is to do with getting somewhere, achieving something, or trying to somehow alter what actually is?

Simply sitting, resting the body, resting the mind, and allowing what is to simply be in awareness - what an amazing thing that is. How little there actually is to say about it ... how little can be expressed in words. How do you convey an inner experience, one which is utterly intangible and ineffable, into words that somehow convey something to another being?

I don't know, and guess that's part of why I've not posted here much over the last year. Seems like it goes in cycles, sometimes feeling a great desire to share, to attempt to cross the divide. Other times, the inclination is to remain with what is, and just allow it to be what it is.

The waves and the ocean are what they are. Can we taste them for what they are? Can we see appearances for what they are and follow their luminous flickering path in awareness?

No direction in this blog, just like there is no direction in mind, in experience. Just what is. Suchness.

How beautiful simply sitting can be.

What's your Poison?

2007-11-14T15:35:00.002Z

One familiar grouping of emotional obscurations in Buddhism is the five poisons - greed, hatred, pride, jealousy and ignorance. I was reflecting this morning that my predominant poison has changed from what it was 6 months ago ... so ....

Let's 'name and shame' !!!!

My predominant poison at present is hatred. (It's the desire to push things away, to reject aspects of experience and seek to move away from them).

6 months ago it was Pride. Previous to that, I was predominantly craving or greed.

Hmm .... interesting the change. Nothing stays the same ... all that arises ceases.

I always remember a teaching that the Buddha gave in the Pali sutta's, of how the person with anger is like someone with a red hot coal in his hand, who is trying to throw it at someone else .... but, the coal just stays in your hand. Likewise, your anger, which seeks to harm another, but actually primarily harms yourself, (as well as them).

Let me focus on and watch Anger, and see how this is ....

Deepening Compassion

2007-11-13T09:43:00.006Z

I thought I'd therefore share some further reflections on Gampopa's threefold classification of Compassion (from The Jewel Ornament of Liberation).

Gampopa's first category - 'Compassion with reference to Sentient beings' is simply the desire to help beings when we see that they are suffering. However, due to our level of understanding and practice, we ourselves suffer alongside those who wish to help. Our compassion, (but lack of wisdom and skillful means) leads us to pain, as we don't have sufficient understanding to help without causing ourselves pain. It's worth noting that this wouldn't be a reason for us to not help! It's still important as a means to develop further compassion and wisdom, and also to actually alleviate suffering, that we do reach out to others, even if that causes us pain :-)

The second form of Compassion that Gampopa notes is that of 'Compassion with reference to the Dharma'. Here we have a deepened level of understanding. As a result, we 'understand' something of the causes of suffering, due to our increased 'understanding' of Dharma. So, when we see suffering, and our desire to help arises, we know that this suffering arises from causes. We know the suffering arises from attachment, from craving and ill-will, and ultimately, from ignorance (of how things really are). We understand something of the Four Noble Truths, and we know something of causality - of Dependent Origination. As such, when compassion arises, and we seek to help others, we suffer less, as we are less inclined to attach, or to crave whilst helping.

For example, we don't get so caught up in results, in needing to 'solve' the others' problem. So we can help, to our utmost, but let go of results, let go of having to take things through to a solution. Sometimes it's not possible to solve the other persons problem (they might have an incurable illness, for example) and in this case, we can help to our utmost, without causing ourself suffering at not being able to control the outcome.

Another aspect here is that now that we've generated some understanding of how suffering comes about - its causes and conditions - we sense that those we see suffering do *not* know what is causing their suffering. We see that they live life only wishing to be happy, but that their very actions are the cause of their suffering. As such, that recognition of their situation is the cause for a much stronger compassion to develop.

The third form of Compassion Gampopa talks about is that of 'Compassion without Reference Point'. This is where we have developed sufficiently that we see something of the true nature of things. We have some experience of Shunyata, of Emptiness, and therefore we no longer cling to the notion of person, of illness, of helping as solidly existent 'things'. As a result of seeing the play of mere appearances in mind, we don't attach to these illusory notions, and therefore we don't suffer whilst helping alleviate suffering. We see this play of appearances, which are ultimately empty, but at the same time, we recognise that the 'person' before us does not see this.

We also see that the difference between seeing things as they are, and of grasping onto the solidity or reality of things, is, in a sense, razor thin. The difference is so slender between seeing, and not seeing.

When the experience of emptiness arises, we see that seeing how things are, and seeing with ignorance is the most subtle shift, in a sense, (and yet the most enormous shift, in another sense!!!!). We see how easy it is to lose this 'view', both during, and between meditations. We slip into it and out of it so easily. So, we have an appreciation of how small a shift it is, in a sense, and how 'easy' it could be for those suffering beings to see in accordance with the nature of things, to act in accordance with the nature of things, and therefore not suffer. That recognition of how 'easy' it would be for them to not suffer becomes the cause for a great compassion to arise in us. The recognition of how unnecessary that suffering is, indeed, how unnecessary and how easily thrown off.

Further, the recognition from the previous stage (and classification) that we ourselves self-cause our own suffering is deepened here - with the addition of now seeing the potential 'ease' of throwing it off.

At this stage, our compassion arises without having an object, as we no longer 'see' any being to be the object of our compassion. Indeed, we no longer see 'ourselves' as being compassionate, nor see the 'act' of compassion either. We see the play of empty appearances - and yet, and yet ... we act. How is this? How can we act, when we no longer see sentient beings, as such? Well, from my very limited experience, this Compassion is the natural response, the natural outpouring of the mind that sees things as they are. It's as if when we take all this mistaken understanding and seeing out of the way, what lay beneath - the sun behind the clouds - can pour forth its energy, which had been previously obscured and dammed up.

- an attempt to clarify in my own mind my own confusion, and previous potentially confusing post ... in the hope it might also be of help to others -

may we all give rise to the Compassion that has no reference point ...

Reflections on Gampopa - Compassion with Reference to Sentient Beings, Reference to Dharma, and without Reference Point

2007-11-12T08:45:00.004Z

In a sense, what distinguishes the three types of Compassion that Gampopa sets out in 'Jewel Ornament of Liberation' is the development and level of our Compassion *and* our Wisdom.

With the first, Compassion with reference to Sentient Beings, we see beings suffering, and we feel a response to that suffering which is our compassion. At this level, we tend to suffer ourselves with that response. We see them suffer and tend to get attached to taking that suffering away.

With Compassion with Dharma as objects, we again see other beings
suffering, but this time we no longer suffer ourselves as a result, even though we may not be able to directly relieve our suffering. We understand something of the nature of things, of dependent origination, of suffering, and the cause of suffering, and therefore can help in a less 'sticky' or attached fashion. We are less attached to our ignorant ideas of how things are, and less attached to 'making things right'. We are able to help more, and let go.

At the level of Compassion without Reference Point, we no longer see things as solid and permanent as we would ordinarily have done. As a result of our developing practice, we see that these beings we have before us are actually all manner of sizes, shapes, colours, smells, etc, arising in our minds. We see that we don't really know where these sensations arise from, nor where they go to. We see that we cannot place or grasp any of those sensations, let alone the 'person' that we assume we see before us. Life begins to take on something of the nature of a dream, rather than the seemingly self-existent solid drama that is somehow 'out there'.

As we begin to see the play of our minds, we become less attached to our ignorant views of what we believe to be actually existent.

As we ourselves begin to loosen the bonds of our suffering, through no longer grasping at our deluded understanding of appearances, we notice how those around us make the same mistakes as we have continually done. We see how they cause there own suffering, through believing in the permanence and solidity of the world, and wanting/not wanting all that passes through it.

As a result of our newly found tendency to let go of this grasping, and causing of our own suffering, we see how they too could let go of causing their own suffering. We see how easy it is, in a sense, to not cause suffering for themselves. Even though this ability has been very hard won for ourselves, and we know full well how easily we lose this ability, we also see how easy it is to not cause self-suffering. It's easy in the sense that in a moment, just one moment, we can either give rise to attachment, or we can just let go. It's just a choice in one moment.

So at one and the same time, we hold a lighter grasp on life, through not grasping at experience as though it was solid, real, and self-existing. And yet we clearly see the suffering of those before us, self-caused suffering, and the natural desire to help them arises.

We see no-one before us, just dreamlike mere appearances, yet we feel strongly compelled to help others to loosen the bonds of suffering, just as we've loosened them.

We we hold these two things, the ultimate and the relative, the view of the dreamlike nature of things, yet the compassionate desire to help dreamlike beings be free of their suffering, then we tend not to suffer ourselves through this compassion.

This is the sense in which I believe Gampopa sets out this classification of Compassion. When we fully believe in the fixed selfhood of ourselves and of others, then we suffer through our compassion. When we see things as they are, with a direct apprehension of appearance and emptiness, then we feel the strongest urges to help relieve that suffering, yet that doesn't become the cause of suffering for ourself.

In those moments, we simply do what needs to be done, without rigid conceptualisation, without attempting to force things, but just a simple outpouring of spontaneous action, with no thought of self or other.

Seeing phenomenon for what they are, we act with compassion, naturally, and most effectively.

Chod Aspiration Prayer

2007-11-07T15:29:00.003Z

Similar to the sun as it rises in the sky,
may this sacred Chod practice that cuts demons
Flourish in all directions and at all times.

Drogon Karma Chagmed

These words, which come towards the end of my Chod practice, always resonate deeply, seeming to come from deep within, and seeming to connect with something vast, which resonates beyond time and space. Useless words, trying to describe the indescribable!

I sometimes wonder how many people practice Chod in England.

And yet, when I practice, such questions seem meaningless, as meaningless as places, separate beings, time, and all other illusory appearances that fleetingly display.

How beautiful this Chod practice, which cuts through the demons of self-hood.

How fortunate this being, who has received these precious instructions.

May illusory beings seemingly without number realise the state of Mahamudra, and dwell in the great Bliss.

Self Liberate Even the Antidote

2007-10-26T14:48:00.001Z

(The third slogan of the Seven Points of Mind Training).

This slogan is the third of the points on the actual practice - the cultivation of Bodhicitta.

Let even the remedy subside .... The antidote will vanish of itself .... Even the Antidote Itself is Liberated in its own Place ....

I guess for me this slogan has several aspects, or levels. What is the remedy or antidote?

Well, clearly it's Emptiness, that which frees us from clinging to a mistakenly solid sense of the world we inhabit, and a mistakenly solid sense of ourselves. Looking deeply at both, we see that our experience is dream-like, ungraspable and illusory. We see that the 'I' that looks is the same, the dream-like gossamer of mere appearance.

What is the nature of that recognition?

It's the emptiness, the ungraspable, mysterious and diaphanous nature of what is. As we look and let go of ignorant projection, the veils of solidity drop away, as does the polarised sense of self and other.

All that is is dream-like appearance, never resting, never staying, never able to be grasped. As we rest in that awareness of how things are, a sense of Emptiness comes into view.

Whether we can rest in that sense of Emptiness is the question. Usually, we either slide into thoughts, or we slip back into dualistic projection of solidity.

But when we do rest in the nature of mind/things, we experience a profound shift. Without forcing it, or grasping after it, this view may visit us awhile.

So what of this third slogan?

There are ways that we can slip off the path, so to speak, at this point.

Grasping after this experience of Emptiness, we can seek to find Emptiness everywhere, not allowing it to open, but grasping and hunting for it. This isn't the correct antidote, and can be let go of.

Similarly, we can lose the experience of Emptiness, and in it's place give rise to the idea or concept of Emptiness. Worlds apart, but easily done, this conceptual idea of Emptiness is not the antidote either, and can be let go of. We can look into those thoughts of Emptiness, and see that they are themselves empty in nature, Shunya.

With our taste of Emptiness, we can mistake it's nature, and arrive at the viewpoint that as all things (including our own self) are Empty, then nothing matters, it's all the same, morality doesn't exist, karma doesn't exist, etc, etc. Mistaking Emptiness for this nihilistic viewpoint, we slip into 'the poison of Emptiness'. It is said that this is even worse than the original ignorant grasping at appearances as being solid and real.

We can take our glimpse of Emptiness, of Shunyata, and grasp after it such that we seek a refuge in it through reification. The first slogan encouraged us to look at our experience of life, of the world. We found it to not only be as solid as we thought, but utterly dreamlike and illusory. That cuts through our foundations, our sense of placement in the world, and undercuts us greatly. It takes the ground out from under our feet.

The second slogan turned our attention onto us, our self, and again, cut the rug out from under our feet. Ourselves too, are dreamlike and illusory.

So there's nothing to cling to there, either 'outside' or 'inside'. That's a big shock to the system, when that's experienced (rather than thoughts).

So what do we tend to do next? We find something to grasp after, some ground to put back beneath our feet ... and that attempted ground is emptiness itself.

We can take our glimpse of emptiness, and imagine that *this is it* ... this is how things are, and this is the ground that therefore I can rely on. Once again, a ground to our being. But is shunyata like this?

Emptiness itself is empty, it's without characteristics. There's nothing there for you to grasp onto, or to give any ground beneath your feet, as it were. Rug pulling number three! Whatever 'answer' we've come up with to the riddle of life, to the nature of mind, ourselves, reality, whatever you wish to call it ... the answer itself is also empty, and without anything to give us security.

Hmm .....

Let go.

Just let go.

What is Life? Who am I?

2007-10-23T16:36:00.001Z

What is this thing called life?

When I look at what I experience ... what do I see?

Things and people I interact with? .... actually, colours and shapes and sounds that arise in experience.

When I look for them ....these people and things ... where are they?

Nowhere. Only shapes and colours, and sounds ....

When I look for these shapes and colours and sounds .... where are they?

Nowhere. Nowhere that I can be certain of, anyway. I can't say they are outside, or inside of me ...where is this thing I call experience taking place? Where is the world?

As I look for it .... it melts away. Nothing I try to focus on is stable and can be found for certain.

My life, the world, reality, whatever you wish to call it .. experience ... nowhere to be found ... and yet it's there!!! really there! bang your head on the wall there! .. but nowhere to be found.

Like a dream .... I seem to inhabit this life, this world, with things that cannot be found ... that seem utterly real ... yet do they exist in the way I *think* they do? .. no ... like a dream. Dreamlike .... a dream. An illusion. As if ... like this ....

Regard all Phenomena as Dreams

(from the Seven Points of Mind Training).

So if life is a dream .... then who am I who experiences this dream?

What is experiencing the dream?

I ask that question, and watch.

A space opens out ... no thinking, no labelling, no analysing ... but a knowing. A knowing of what is ....... who am I?

Nothing.

There's nothing there.

Where is this me .... the body ... sensations that appear to arise and cease .. yet they are nowhere to found. Where do they come from ... these sensations of body? Nowhere. Where do they go? Nowhere. Nowhere to be found, coming from nowhere and going nowhere.

Hmm .....

I think about that .... thoughts!

Where are they? ....

Nowhere. Seemingly arising .. yet not actually there .... and not coming from anywhere I can find, or going anywhere I can find ..... like a dream, these sensations of body .... these thoughts.

Emotions too .. memories ... all that I think of as 'me' ... like a dream .. nowhere to be found. I not that ... so what I am ....

What of awareness .... this that is aware of all that seems to arise?

Is that me?

Where is it .... I turn to it .. and watch .....

Seemingly there ... seemingly.

When I experience a sound ... seemingly awareness is there as I experience it.

But what is there beyond the sound ... the seeming experience itself? Nothing lying *behind* it ... beneath it ... beyond it? ... Nothing that I can find.

What is there of me then, if awareness arises ... as experience arises ... and seemingly goes again ... to where, I don't know?

Am I not stable .. continuous?

Dreams that come and go .. seemingly.

Awareness that comes and go ... seemingly.

What is this *I* then ..... but seeming illusions .... that I can't pin down.

This awareness .. this awareness/experience-ness ... that arises together ... simultaneously, co-existently .. where is it?

I can't find it.

Where did it come from?

I can find an answer .....

Where does it go?

I don't know ... it doesn't seem to go anywhere.

Not existing, no coming from anywhere, not going anywhere .... I am not.

Yet I am. I experience this life, this dream ... I bang my head on the wall .... I experience it!

I am nothing ... yet I seem to experience the dream ...

Examine the Nature of the Unborn Mind

(from the Seven Points of Mind Training).

What is Life?

Who am I?

Nobody dreaming.

Abandon any Hope of Fruition

2007-10-03T11:24:00.002Z

I thought I'd just share this teaching from Pema Chodron on one of the slogans of the 7 Point Mind Training. This one cuts really deep for me, and has had a profound influence on my practice.

It's such an interesting area ... this tension between trying to get somewhere (other than where we are now) ... and being able to truly open up to what we experience and allowing ourselves to come to rest in peace and compassion ....

Our next slogan is "Abandon any hope of fruition." You could also say, "Give up all hope" or "Give up" or just "Give." The shorter the better.

One of the most powerful teachings of the Buddhist tradition is that as long as you are wishing for things to change, they never will. As long as you're wanting yourself to get better, you won't. As long as you have an orientation toward the future, you can never just relax into what you already have or already are.

One of the deepest habitual patterns that we have is to feel that now is not good enough. We think back to the past a lot, which maybe was better than now, or perhaps worse. We also think ahead quite a bit to the future - which we may fear - always holding out hope that it might be a little bit better than now. Even if now is going really well -we have good health and we've met the person of our dreams, or we just had a child or got the job we wanted-nevertheless there's a deep tendency always to think about how it's going to be later. We don't quite give ourselves full credit for who we are in the present.

For example, it's easy to hope that things will improve as a result of meditation, that we won't have such bad tempers anymore or we won't have fear anymore or people will like us more than they do now. Or maybe none of those things are problems for us, but we feel we aren't spiritual enough. Surely we will connect with that awake, brilliant, sacred world that we are going to find through meditation. In everything we read -whether it's philosophy or dharma books or psychology- there's the implication that we're caught in some kind of very small perspective and that if we just did the right things, we'd begin to connect with a bigger world, a vaster world, different from the one we're in now.

One reason I wanted to talk about giving up all hope of fruition is because I've been meditating and giving dharma talks for some time now, but I find that I still have a secret passion for what it's going to be like when-as they say in some of the classical texts, all the veils have been removed." It's that same feeling of wanting to jump over yourself and find something that's more awake than the present situation, more alert than the present situation. Sometimes this occurs at a very mundane level: you want to be thinner, have less acne or more hair. But somehow there's almost always a subtle or not so subtle sense of disappointment, a sense of things not completely measuring up.

In one of the first teachings I ever heard, the teacher said, "I don't know why you came here, but I want to tell you right now that the basis of this whole teaching is that you're never going to get everything together." I felt a little like he had just slapped me in the face or thrown cold water over my head. But I've always remembered it. He said, "You're never going to get it all together." There isn't going to be some precious future time when all the loose ends will be tied up. Even though it was shocking to me, it rang true. One of the things that keeps us unhappy is this continual searching for pleasure or security, searching for a little more comfortable situation, either at the domestic level or at the spiritual level or at the level of mental peace.

Nowadays, people go to a lot of different places trying to find what they're looking for. There are 12 -step programs; someone told me that there is now a 24-step program; someday there will probably be a 108-step program. There are a lot of support groups and different therapies. Many people feel wounded and are looking for something to heal them. To me it seems that at the root of healing, at the root of feeling like a fully adult person, is the premise that you're not going to try to make anything go away, that what you have is worth appreciating. But this is hard to swallow if what you have is pain.

In Boston there's a stress-reduction clinic run on Buddhist principles. It was started by Dr. Jon Kabat-Zinn, a Buddhist practitioner and author of Full Catastrophe Living. He says that the basic premise of his clinic-to which many people come with a lot of pain-is to give up any hope of fruition. Otherwise the treatment won't work. If there's some sense of wanting to change yourself, then it comes from a place of feeling that you're not good enough. It comes from aggression toward yourself, dislike of your present mind, speech, or body; there's something about yourself that you feel is not good enough. People come to the clinic with addictions, abuse issues, or stress from work-with all kinds of issues. Yet this simple ingredient of giving up hope is the most important ingredient for developing sanity and healing.

That's the main thing. As long as you're wanting to be thinner, smarter, more enlightened, less uptight, or whatever it might be, somehow you're always going to be approaching your problem with the very same logic that created it to begin with: you're not good enough. That's why the habitual pattern never unwinds itself when you're trying to improve, because you go about it in exactly the same habitual style that caused all the pain to start.

There's a life-affirming teaching in Buddhism, which is that Buddha, which means "awake," is not someone you worship. Buddha is not someone you aspire to; Buddha is not somebody that was born more than two thousand years ago and was smarter than you'll ever be. Buddha is our inherent nature - our Buddha nature - and what that means is that if you're going to grow up fully, the way that it happens is that you begin to connect with the intelligence that you already have. It's not like some intelligence that's going to be transplanted into you. If you're going to be fully mature, you will no longer be imprisoned in the childhood feeling that you always need to protect yourself or shield yourself because things are too harsh. If you're going to be a grown-up -which I would define as being completely at home in your world no matter how difficult the situation-it's because you will allow something that's already in you to be nurtured. You allow it to grow, you allow it to come out, instead of all the time shielding it and protecting it and keeping it buried.

Someone once told me, "When you feel afraid, that's 'fearful Buddha.' " That could be applied to whatever you feel. Maybe anger is your thing. You just go out of control, and you see red, and the next thing you know you're yelling or throwing something or hitting someone. At that time, begin to accept the fact that that's "enraged Buddha." If you feel jealous, that's "jealous Buddha." If you have indigestion, that's "buddha with heartburn." If you're happy, "happy buddha"; if bored, "bored buddha." In other words, anything that you can experience or think is worthy of compassion; anything you could think or feel is worthy of appreciation.

This teaching was powerful for me; it stuck. I would find myself in various states of mind and various moods, going up and down, going left and right, falling on my face and sitting up-just in all these different life situations-and I would remember, "Buddha falling flat on her face; Buddha feeling on top of the world; Buddha longing for yesterday." I began to learn that I couldn't get away from Buddha no matter how hard I tried. I could stick with myself through thick and thin. If one would enter into an unconditional relationship with oneself, one would be entering into an unconditional relationship with Buddha.

This is why the slogan says, "Abandon any hope of fruition." "Fruition" implies that at a future time you will feel good. There is another word, which is open -to have an open heart and open mind. This is oriented very much to the present. If you enter into an unconditional relationship with yourself, that means sticking with the Buddha right now on the spot as you find yourself.

Because it's a monastery, there's nothing you can do at Gampo Abbey that's fun, unless you like to meditate all the time or take walks in nature, but everything gets boring after awhile. There's no sex there, you can't drink there, you also can't lie. Occasionally we'll see a video, but that's rare and usually there's a dispute about what it's going to be. The food is sometimes good and sometimes terrible; it's just a very uncomfortable place. The reason it's uncomfortable is that you can't get away from yourself there. However, the more people make friends with themselves, the more they find it a nurturing and supportive place where you can find out the buddhaness of your own self as you are right now, today. Right now today, could you make an unconditional relationship with yourself? just at the height you are, the weight you are, the amount of intelligence that you have, the burden of pain that you have? Could you enter into an unconditional relationship with that?

Giving up any hope of fruition has something in common with the title of my previous book, The Wisdom of no Escape. "No escape" leaves you continually right in the present, and the present is whatever it is, whatever mood you happen to be in, whatever thoughts you happen to be having. That's it.

Whether you get meditation instruction from the Theravada tradition or the Zen tradition or the Vajrayana tradition, the basic instruction is always about being awake in the present moment. What they don't tell you is that the present moment can be you, this you about whom you sometimes don't feel very good. That's what there is to wake up to.

When one of the emperors of China asked Bodhidharma (the Zen master who brought Zen from India to China) what enlightenment was, his answer was, "Lots of space, nothing holy." Meditation is nothing holy. Therefore there's nothing that you think or feel that somehow gets put in the category of "sin." There's nothing that you can think or feel that gets put in the category of "bad." There's nothing that you can think or feel that gets put in the category of "wrong." It's all good juicy stuff-the manure of waking UP, the manure of achieving enlightenment, the art of living in the present moment.

Reflections on Anthony deMello - The Dawning of Enlightenment

2007-08-31T11:09:00.002Z

Is there anything I can do to make myself enlightened?
As little as you can do to make the sun rise in the morning.
Then of what use are the spiritual exercises you prescribe?
To make sure you are not asleep when the sun begins to rise.

Anthony deMello, from One Minute Wisdom

Not sure who Anthony deMello is, but I can really relate to this quote. Not that I have any experience of Enlightenment! But simply that trying, doing, grasping after is so very fruitless. Getting out of the way of, letting go, opening is how it works for me. Not for everyone, maybe, and maybe not always for me, at all times. But right now, Let Go is where it's at.

The spiritual exercises, the meditation, the prayers, they all open me out and prepare me, make me a good and worthy vessel, as they say, for what flowers from within, for what has always been there, like the sun obscured by the clouds. Just keep doing what can be done, not to get somewhere, but just to do. Practice what can be practiced, and what can't be practiced will shine through.
You can't pull on the flower heads, to make the plant grow any faster, can you?

You can't force the world to be the way you want it to be, or yourself.

It's funny, it's like a sideshow, this polishing the mirror, this practicing what can be done. And yet, it's the real deal too.

When we do these exercises, where do we do them from? We open to what is, we open to our true nature, we open to our experience. And we practice from there, from that experience, on the basis and within and from that .....

It permeates our experience, like a memory, or resonance. It imbues what we do with the flavour of what truly is, our very nature, the nature of all ....

Allow the sun to shine .. step out of the way, with our dark clouds of desire and ill-will.

And see that the clouds are the sun itself :-)

Examine the Nature of the Unborn Mind

2007-03-15T12:38:00.002Z

Second slogan of the 7 Point Mind Training.

What is this teaching pointing at?

Well, just like the previous slogan it emphasises the ultimate aspect of mind. Previously we were enjoined to examine the nature of appearances. What is the nature of what we experience, of all the phenomena which appear to our 'minds eye'? We found that they were empty, and lacking in any solidity or characteristic.

Now we are asked to look again, but this time at that which is looking. What is the nature of the mind, of the awareness within which all these phenomena or dharmas were appearing?

Step back or look deeper. It's not just what we thought was 'out there'. It's 'us' too!

Looking at our awareness itself, how is it? How does it appear?

It's harder to see, for me at least, than the 'things' that seem to arise within it. Turning attention away from those arisings, and looking at where they arise, we don't really find anything at all. I look for this awareness, and I don't really find anything. I look for that which looks, and I don't find anything. I look for 'me' and I don't really find anything.

Ultimately, not only does nothing truly arise, but there is nothing which is truly there experiencing this!

Hmm. That can be a little disquieting, at least to our small sense of self, our ego or 'me'.

It's a bit like we've been invited to do the work, to look at all that arises in our minds, and to see through it all, and therefore to be invited to let go at grasping all of that. And now, just when we thought it was safe to go back into the water, just when we've given the ego something safe to hang onto (that all that 'out there' is empty, but at least I'm here, and 'I' can see that!) ... well, no buddy, you're not there either! Take that!

Hmm. Examine. I take this to mean - bring to awareness 'mind' or 'awareness', and not think about it. We turn our gaze as it were to that which is gazing. It's a funny, subtle step .... one which most of us are not much attuned to. We look at the looker, we are aware of awareness itself. At first it's rather like trying to balance something on a needle tip, or razor blade ... we just keeping falling off, into thinking, or 'making sense of it'. But, gradually, we build up some sort of capacity to rest in that awareness, and hold awareness itself in awareness. We rest in minds own nature. For a while (in my case :-)

And we don't really then find anything, though there seems to be something there. Empty, yet seemingly there as we say. That's how it is, that's its Nature.

What of Unborn? Well, my awareness seems to arise and fall as I get lost in distraction or lack of awareness, and then jump back into wakefullness. So how is that not unborn?

Looking at that experience of seeming discontinuity of awareness, I don't find a start or end to awareness, I cannot 'put my finger' on it. There is no edge, no definite moment that I can truly identify when it is or isn't there. That's not to say that it does't seem to arise, or cease, but 'finding' that start or end is impossible. That is unborn.

but actually I think it means more than this, and that's something I don't experience yet.

I think it points to a deeper level of awareness, to a deeper level of mind, Original Mind, which I don't experience yet. That is awareness which doesn't rise or fall as my conscious awareness seems to. Which doesn't switch off when I get lost in distraction, and which doesn't diminish when I lose awareness in sleep. *That* is unborn, unborn in another sense.

But that is for another time, for discovery, not conjecture :-)

Regard all Phenomena as Dreams

2007-03-02T12:37:00.001Z

'Regard all dharmas as dreams'.

This is the first slogan of the second section of the 'Seven Points of Mind Training'. It's the first of the slogans which emphasise the ultimate quality of Bodhicitta - that of Emptiness. I've been bringing this to mind the last few days.

I remember many years ago, when first practising Dharma I used to wonder about this phrase or teaching. I used to try to see things in this light, but to a degree, it felt like mind games. Experience was so vivid, so clear, and yet, I was being told it was like a dream. I took this to mean that it wasn't as real as I thought it was .... that somehow it was 'made up', that it was hazy and unclear, and that I would somehow 'wake up' from it. What would I wake up into? Well, somehow I imagined something entirely unlike 'this', whatever 'this' was that I was experiencing. Somehow it was going to be shiny and light, transcendent .... an entirely different plane of existence altogether!

Well, it always felt a little fraudulent, trying to take on that view, as I didn't truly experience it ... just hoped I would, or try to reach towards it, trying to find hints of it in my experience. And find them I did .... little hints or glimpses of what it might mean, this dreamlike state of existence that I was trying to wake up from.

Many years have passed, and much of my yearning for the dramatic and different has passed. Grand ideas of what this 'transcendence' was have given way to the gentle opening of experience, and something other than just ideas.

Though I have no realisation whatsoever, I sense growing experience of the things the teachings point at. And that gives great comfort and hope, that all this is not in vain, that the path can be walked, and that even a simple being with much difficult karma such as myself can open the heart and mind to the teachings.

All dharmas are dreams .... all phenomena are dreams.

What do we know?

We go around in the world, thinking we know things ..... we see something, and we label it in our minds, and 'know' it. We see shapes and maybe smells .. and we label it 'dog'. And we think we know that.

But where is the dog?

Where is this thing that we think we know?

In my experience there arises shapes and sounds, and colours and smells. From that .... I jump to something else. Dog.

And then I do all manner of things on the basis of my knowing 'dog'. I remember things about dogs. I act in ways that are patterns in relation to dogs. And I treat this that arises in experience on the basis of my thoughts, views, ideas and emotions in relation to dog. Yet where is the direct experiences in my sensory consciousness's? They seem to get lost and left behind in the rush to concept ... in the grasping after 'dog' and acting on the basis of 'dog'.

Same thing with my partner and kids .... same thing with work .... same thing with meditation ...same thing all round .... I experience sensory arisings ... and then I grasp after concepts to make sense of them. And then I pay a lot of attention to the concept and very little to the direct sensory experience.

So what? Well, the sensory experiences are very direct. They seem to arise in my experience directly. They are vivid and alive. What of the ideas that I impute on them? They are secondary phenomena which have not real existence in and of themselves ... only in my monkey mind, in my mind consciousness. And they could clearly be easily swapped for other ideas which would equally well describe and make sense of my sensory experience. So they are relative .... chosen on the basis of bias from my past experience and exposure ... and entirely fictional. They fit the sense data more or less .... but so would so many other concepts. And those other concepts would lead to different experiences, and different responses to the sensory data.

In a sense, those sense impressions are real. They appear to arise for me in my experience. There is an arising of a shape. They is no mind separate from that shape, and there is no shape separate from that mind that knows it.

In comparison, the concepts that I then automatically make up to make sense of those impressions .... are they real? They are like a dream. They are just imputed. They are 'made up'. They are interpretations ... which only make sense to me, if at all. No-one else, just me, at that moment, with my experience and history.

At least you could say that I have the sense of darkness. Of movement, of smells shifting. Of sound, loud or soft. In a sense.

Yet the concept dog .. that thing that I actually pay attention to, and swap with my direct experience .... that is a mirage, and a dream.

To the realised master ... why do they delight so in the simple things in life ... in the simple things in nature ... in the simple act of eating, or seeing a flower, or just walking? Why do they have a childs delight in those things? Is it because (in part) that they don't get lost in the concept .... the concept which includes the notion that we've seen it all before ... we know this thing, we know this concept .. and therefore are barely alive to what we experience, as it passes us by, as we rush to the next high, the next experience?

Delighting in the immediate .. delighting in experience, direct and simple .... what a joy that is :-)

And how different that is from being lost in our concepts ... our understanding .. our explanation of what we experience.

All phenomena are dreams.

When we look deeply, we see that these 'understandings' of things that we have .. these concepts and ideas with which we make sense of things ..... they are dreamlike and illusory, in comparison with the sense impressions we have .... and the emotions which arise on them. Yet we spend our lives grasping after them, and acting on them ... as the sense impressions slip away, forgotten and un-noticed.

Utterly habitual, and beyond the normal person's control. Only though the process of sustained awareness, of cultivating awareness, and seeing through our experience for what it is .... do we see that we've swapped the vividness and aliveness of what is ... our sense impressions and simple emotions .... and grasped after our complex ideas with all their 'castles built on sand' quality.

and yet .. and yet .... looking deeper still at these sense impressions .... where are they?

For sure they seem to arise ... in experience .. and vivid too.

Can we doubt that they seem to arise .. so fresh and alive they are to our minds?

And yet .. and yet .... where are they ... as we search for them ... how do we touch them in our minds ..... to grasp them .. or hold them .. .they just slip away too as dreams. Looking deeply, all sense impressions just slip away through our fingers. The act of looking dissolves them into mist.

Where are these direct sense impressions then, that we'd swapped for illusory concepts?

Like mirages too .... like dreams and illusions ... these impressions slip away before the light of awareness.

And yet ... they seem to arise.

Seeming to arise in experience, yet not to be found.

Seeing one ... we see the other ... inseparable. Seeming arising ..... and emptiness.

Seeming experience, yet lack of any solidity to it.

All phenomena are like dreams.

Concepts, sense impressions all .... untouchable, ungraspable, open and cannot-be-pinned-down-ness ......

yet seemingly there in extraordinary vividness and clarity.

The more I let go of concepts, the more vivid and clear experience becomes. And the more transparent too.

Vivid and Transparent .....

Dreamlike.

Luminous Emptiness.

Use the Blade to Cut the Blade

2007-02-15T12:00:00.002Z

From a post to a Dharma List:

Is desire the same as attachment? Most translations of Buddhist terms will use craving or attachment interchangeably. They both are used for when we take an object and exaggerate the positive qualities of that object, and as a result, we feel a neurotic desire to have or possess that thing, whether mental or physical.

Occasionally however, you see these two terms used slightly differently. Sometimes attachment is used to refer to the stage of grasping (Upadana) in the 12 Nidanas, or 12 stages of dependent
arising. So attachment is seen as the next step on from craving (Tanha). Craving is the original desire for something, and craving is the act of moving towards that object, the action on that initial impulse in order to make it yours. That action results in the clinging on to existence or becoming.

Further to that .... both craving and ill-will are sometimes described as forms of attachment. In this context, attachment can be either the movement to pull something towards you *or* the movement to push something away. Either way, we are caught up with the object, as it were. So in that context, attachment includes desire and ill-will, rather than desire as distinct from ill-will.

But is all craving really bad? What about the desire to help others? This is indeed a very interesting question! After all, how could be follow a path, the path of Dharma, without having some sort of desire towards the goal of the path! If the goal of the path wasn't attractive, and we didn't desire it on some level, then what would impel us to move towards it, and make all the necessary efforts to attain that goal? Similarly, how could we help others without *wanting* to help them?

I was reflecting that there are a number of things going on here. One is that we refine our motivations throughout the path. In the beginning we are filled with desire. And our desire towards the Dharma is perhaps little different to that towards any other object. We grasp at it, and are very attached to it. In a sense, it is another set of clothing for our ego. It's perhaps what Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche used to call 'Spiritual Materialism'.

We might be very attached to going on retreat, for example, or classes, or other things, and overlook the fact that we don't do the fair share of the washing up, or cooking and leave it conveniently to our partner.

We might be overly precious about Dharma objects, and actually respond to them with desire and attachment, rather than genuine devotion.

However, over the course of time, and practice, we gradually transform our minds and actions, and gradually we find that we are less attached, and more able to act from love and compassion and generosity. As such, there's less 'me' in all our actions. There's less concern for what we get out of it, and more concern for others. Beyond that, we become less concerned in a sense for others (in the sense of still seeing them as distinct objects) and just do what needs to be done ... just act, but without the sense of an 'I', an 'other', or the 'action'.

Along the way, we refine out the sense of self (and selfishness) and so our 'desires' if you call it that are more and more freed up from craving in the sense of trying to get something to make our sense of self feel better, or to validate its existence.

I think it's good to recognise that in the early days our motivations (which is what creates karma) is always going to be mixed. There'll always be a bit of 'me' in there amongst our concern for others. We don't need to beat up on ourselves for that, for not being perfect straight away .... isn't just how it is ... it's just where we are starting from. But, over time, those motivations will change if we practice correctly. And then we'll be less concerned with ourselves, our actions will be less impure and tainted by egotistic concerns, and we'll act more and more from love, compassion and generosity.

So we use the blade to cut the blade. We use desire ... our desire to walk the path, to attain to Buddhahood for the sake of all sentient beings .... we use that desire to bring about the transcending of our own little desires.

It does seem to me that it's useful to recognise that short of Buddhahood our actions are likely to have some 'me' in there somewhere. But, we have to act, and we have to travel the path. So we act as best we can, with the best motives we can, and trust that we will increasingly act from purer motives. To the extent that you desire something good for another, then you create good karma. To the extent that that desire is tainted by some sort of desire for our own self to gain out of that (perhaps by being seen to be 'good' or 'Buddhist'), then we create some mixed or even negative karma. But the extent to which there is no thought of 'I', 'Other' or 'action' at all (which is further down the path), then we create less karma at all, whether good or bad.

One of the epithets of the Buddha in the Pali Canon is 'he who leaves no track' i.e. he who creates no karma whatsoever.

Illusory Objects of Desire

2007-02-13T11:53:00.001Z

I was reflection on the notion that attachment or desire is not just for objects, but also for our sense of self. We are not only attached to things of the material world, (and also to thoughts and emotions), but also to our sense of who we are too.

All of them we think of as existing in their own right, as being 'things' as it were.

Beyond this, we think of that 'thing' as having characteristics. And we typically exaggerate those characteristics of those things which we are attached to. We blow them out of proportion.

So there is the problem of not seeing something accurately in the sense of exaggerating its characteristics, whether that is of beauty, value etc. But deeper still goes the problem of actually thinking this thing is truly exist - it has a real existence with an enduring, unending lifespan.

Yet, as the teachings tell us, and we can see in our experience, nothing lasts, and nothing truly exists in that solid, unchanging sense as we believe. Everything that appears to our mind is like an illusion - it most certainly seems to appear, yet as we look for it, we cannot truly find it. It appears to abide nowhere, it appears to arise from nowhere, and we cannot see where it goes to. In short, it's an empty appearance.

So at root our desiring and grasping at things involves this miss recognition of how things actually exist.

The extent that we still feel there is an 'I' doing, a 'receiver' of our actions, and an 'action' itself, i.e. we haven't seen through the empty nature of all of these, then our actions will be tainted by ignorance, most likely manifest in desire and ill-will, and result in some karma.

But it's not an all or nothing. We start where we are .... and we do the best we can, and trust in the power of the path and teachings (and teachers) .... to allow us to develop and purify our actions .....

Covetousness - Craving

2007-01-15T18:30:00.001Z

I was reflecting on covetousness, and the whole area of craving this morning. I was in particular wondering why my mind tends to focus in a particular way in relation to this. In a sense, it has a choice. It can either focus on what it has already got, or on what it is lacking or wants. Why is it that my mind so often gravitates towards what it feels it lacks?

This has been called the 'poverty mentality'. This is the sense that somehow, whatever we have in life, somehow we are lacking, or bereft. Whatever we've got, we seem to want more. However we are, we feel that something needs filling inside.

I noticed in my meditation this morning that thoughts about what I would do later that day, after meditation had close, were flitting up into consciousness. Why did I need to have 'goodies' lined up ahead of me. Why couldn't I let all of that just take care of itself, and reside where I was, content and at peace with how things are?

It was interesting reflecting on this later, as it struck me that this need to plan, to have stuff to do, to fill up my time, was symptomatic of this type of 'poverty mentality', where part of me focuses on what I feel I lack. It doesn't seem at all related to what I actually have, as I engage in this type of planning thoughts to fill my day irrespective of how well things are going, or what I've got. My craving in that sense seems to just be generic, to be a general pattern, regardless of my overall state of mind, or the state of my life.

Other times, I seems to reside in contentment, and this sort of neurotic craving is much abated. At those times, I seem filled with gratitude, and a sense of wonder at what is, and a true sense of appreciation. Yet even in the bliss of meditation, if I look deeply, there's still a small voice which yearns for more, which wants things to continue, or change, or somehow be arranged to a certain order.

So my mind can go either way, into contentment (relatively speaking), or this poverty mentality.

What else could be my general attitude with respect to covetousness?

One thing could be an appreciation of my Buddha Nature, of what my birthright is, as it were, and therefore a desire to generate positive mental states, and benefit for all beings. Rather than focus on what I am missing, or even what I have, I could focus on expanding my ability to walk the path, and transform myself and the world in the process.

In a way, that focus on the spiritual job at hand gets me out of either feeling I lack, or reviewing what I have got, and takes me into the realm of the lack of true existence of all appearances and phenomena. When I have this sense, that appearances are empty, them my craving and covetousness seems to totally drop away. So much so, that it seems impossible to imagine how such as covetousness could ever arise again. Of course it does arise again, as emptiness is only an experience for me, not a realisation. Yet for that time, I taste the world free of desire, and how blessed is that?

One of the interesting things for me at the moment with meditation, is remembering the perspective that invariably arises in the course of my meditation - that of how things are - bringing that into mind, in however residual a form, in the earlier parts of my meditation. It's always there, it's always timeless and part of what I am, yet often it seems lost to awareness, only to be discovered later in the meditation, as if newly discovered. Yet I can, if I incline, find the trace of that recognition, and bring that to the start of my meditation, so that meditation is more based on that recognition, a deepening of that recognition, rather than a path newly trod as it were.

Some ramblings and reflections on Covetousness .....

His Holiness Karmapa in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia

2006-10-26T16:01:00.001Z

His Holiness the 17th Karmapa, Trinley Thaye Dorje is currently in Malaysia, and leading a variety of Pujas, Empowerments and other Dharma activities. I’m documenting what’s happening at the Kuala Lumpur centre, and trying to keep up with events as best I can by posting to the centre website:
Karma Kagyu Dharma Society, Kuala Lumpur

but, I’m getting further and further behind!

Each day there’s one or two events, and friends at the centre are sending me images and text across the world, via the internet, and I’m creating the pages and optimising the images, and posting the result. But the images are so fantastic it’s so hard to decide what to leave out! Each day I get about 4 or 500 images … and end up creating pages for 20-40 images ... each optimised for search engines, each optimised for download time, and each lovingly crafted to look their best, and share the joy of the Dharma and our glorious Kagyu lineage with any website visitors.

If I was sensible, I’d just put up a dozen images, then I’d be able to keep up with events. But I can’t! I want to share more than that … so I’m getting many days behind on events. Nevermind, I’ll get there in the end, and each event will appear on the site.

It’s seven years since Karmapa last visited the centre, and at that time I was living in Kuala Lumpur. It was a decisive time of my life, and meeting His Holiness was a profound experience. My eldest son took Refuge, as did I in the Kagyu lineage. The new centre has replaced the old one I knew so well, and what a delightful building it has turned out to be. So much care and loving attention has gone into every detail – it’s a joy to see.

The consecration ceremonies for the various statues took place more than a week ago, and it was extraordinary to see what went into the whole process. Every statue was filled with sacred and precious materials which had been prepared over a long period of weeks. The bases of the statues – the plinths they stood on were likewise filled. I never dreamed that so much was 'poured into' the material objects in this way:
Images of Consecration

anyway … in a sense I just wanted to convey my joy over these auspicious events taking place in Kuala Lumpur !

sometimes what you write isn’t what you expected to write before you started!

May all beings share in the joy of the pure Dharma teachings ….

Chodpa

Beautiful Sky

2006-09-04T14:22:00.001Z

Is there anything more beautiful in this world of ours than a deep blue, almost clear sky, with traces of white puffy cloud? How indescribable is the depth of that 'blueness' .... seen in mind, in the present, with full awareness? Sky's vast openess perfectly mirrors the nature of mind ... open and unlimited, vivid and clear, yet utterly ungraspable.

What joy at seeing such beautiful appearances, and being reminded of what runs through all appearances ...

How blessed!

Sojong

2006-08-02T08:40:00.003Z

Today I'm practicing Sojong - the practicing for purifying and restoring broken vows. I'm joining many of the 'Vision Group' in Singapore, supporters of my Guru, Shangpa Rinpoche, who have been regularly practicing Sojong on significant days of the lunar calendar. The practice was supposed to have been instituted among the general population by Vasubandhu, sometimes referred to as a Second Buddha.

"By this action, may I purify all my bad karma, refrain from further wrong action, and become a means for all beings to transcend suffering".

Below follows the instructions from Shangpa Rinpoche for Sojong:

Sojong – The Significance and Benefits of the Practice

Sojong is a practice for purifying and restoring broken vows. "So" means 'to restore', i.e. to make broken vows and replenish positive virtues. "Jong" means 'to purify', i.e. to clear away negative karmas and harmful deeds. Traditionally, Sojong is practised bimonthly by members of the sangha to restore any broken Pratimoksha vows. This purification practice is also observed by some lay Buddhists. For lay Buddhists, Sojong is usually practised on holy days, full moon (Lunar 15th day) and new moon (Lunar 30th day) days.

For lay Buddhists, Sojong comprises taking the 8 Mahayana Precepts for one day and a formal confession. We tend to break our precepts constantly due to our deluded emotions and habits. Sojong cultivates a deliberate effort to reflect on oneself - a practitioner becomes more mindful of his own habitual tendencies, and by developing compassion and bodhicitta, he will awaken his natural innate state - his true Buddha nature. In today’s world, Sojong is a particularly useful practice for busy people who have no time for more formal practise in monasteries or Buddhist Centres. It is a simple but meaningful practice even a busy person can easily do at home or at work.

The Mahayana Sojong is primarily practiced to develop Bodhichitta – i.e. loving kindness and compassion. Yet, most lay people choose to take the 8 precept and practice Sojong only on holy or multiplying days. The Mahayana Sutra mentioned that on every 8th day of the month according to the lunar Tibetan calendar, millions of tiny beings in space die due to the changes in the energy of moon which creates strong elemental forces that they cannot withstand. It is therefore very important to develop compassion and loving kindness towards them, dedicate merits to them and wish for their liberation. Rinpoche personally prays for their liberation on this day, he also encourages each and every one of us who wishes to practise Sojong to remember our bodhicatta aspirations and to do our part on this day.

Compassion and wisdom are the core components of enlightenment. When we combine Rinpoche’s teaching with our inherent compassion to practice wisely, and cultivate within us compassion and bodhicitta for all sentient beings, these noble qualities will grow stronger and stronger, until it gradually becomes our nature. As we further refine our understanding of the teachings we receive with diligent practice, we will eventually be able to arrive at the fruition of our aspirations – enlightenment for the sake of all sentient beings. No matter where we are, as long as we are able to spare a few moments, with mindfulness and with the right understanding of the Sojong practice, we can put into practice one of the most wonderful Buddha’s teachings.

Below are some guidelines for practice by a lay practitioner at home:-

1) Preliminary Preparation: Set up a small shrine with an image of Buddha (may be picture, statue, photo, etc.).

2) Taking Refuge:

"In the Buddha, Dharma and Sangha, I take refuge until enlightenment is won; by the merits of giving and other virtuous deeds; may I attain Buddhahood for the sake of all beings."

(Recite three times.)

3) Generating Bodhicitta:

"Through this practice, may I quickly awaken to my true Buddha nature. May countless beings benefit."

4) Invocation:

"I invoke as my eternal, infallible and true witness my guru and all the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas of the three times."

Visualize in the space in front of oneself is one's guru, in the form of Avalokitesvara (or other Buddhas and Bodhisattvas), surrounded by the principal and lineage masters, Buddhas and Bodhisattvas.

5) Reflection: Search one’s mind for any broken vow(s) and regrets for lapses in mindfulness. Look deeply into oneself and the thousands of habitual tendencies that seem to define oneself. Realise that one’s nature is really one’s ego persistently but ignorantly trying to assert its own identity. The only way to awaken from this delusional state is to cultivate a continuous state of crystal clear awareness so that habitual tendencies are instantly recognised and liberated the moment they arise.

6) Taking the 8 Mahayana Precepts:

"I affirm and vow to all the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas that I shall:-

1) not kill,
2) not steal,
3) abstain from sexual acts,
4) abstain from telling lies,
5) abstain from alcohol and other intoxicants,
6) abstain from singing, dancing, wearing frivolous things,
7) abstain from meals after noon time,
8) abstain from high seats or luxurious beds."

These precepts are essentially the same as the monastic precepts, except instead of taking them for life; a lay practitioner takes them for one day at a time. Taking the precepts from dawn to dawn is a very effective way to train the body, speech and mind of a lay practitioner. If the precepts are kept correctly, one’s ignorance will diminish; his knowledge and wisdom will naturally increase; his meditation practice will also benefit.

7) Dedication of Merit:

"I dedicate the merit of this and all Sojong practice to each and every sentient being. May all beings accomplish within their minds the accumulation of moral disciplines, concentrative meditation, transcendental wisdom, and ultimately attain enlightenment and be freed from the sufferings of Samsara."

This dedication is an act of generosity - sharing our benefits and merits from this practice with all sentient being.

(Instructions from Shangpa Rinpoche, recorded by his devotee Vicky, Singapore, 2006).

These are some words on Sojong (Practice of Confession) by Supreme Master Padmasambhava, the Second Buddha:

To fully restore all positivity,
To clear away all negativity;
To replenish (so) virtue and purify (jong) harmful deeds;
The Tathagata has taught the practice of Sojong.

Sufferings and Karma

2006-07-12T19:24:00.001Z

Yesterday morning as I was driving along a cat suddenly shot out from the woods and into the path of my car. In an instant my rear wheel hit the cat. In my rear mirror I could see it jumping around on the road, obviously in pain. The poor thing ... what would I give to not have been on that road at that time, or for the cat to have sped out from the trees moments later than it did! How painful replaying the images of what happened throughout the day. The poor thing.

Today I wondered how it came to be that we both met in that point of time. What actions had we taken to lead us to that point ... what actions came to fruition at that point for both of us?

Split seconds either way, it wouldn't have happened. But it did, just as it did. My poor friend, why did I do that to you? I pray for your wellbeing and freedom from suffering. I'm so sorry for my part in your suffering :-)

Devotion to Prajnaparamita

2006-06-29T16:12:00.001Z

I was reflecting this morning on how much devotion images of the deity Prajnaparamita bring forth from me.

Given that she is the deity who represents Wisdom, rather than Love, Compassion, Patience and so on .... how interesting that she inspires so much devotion in me.

Pretty much every image I've ever seen of her makes we want to rest the image on the top of my head, and offer gratitude to her. Maybe the fact that there are so few images and statues of her historically, compared to other deities, is something to do with this .. how wonderful it actually is to come across one :-)

Then again, I reflect that karma and connections seems such a strong factor here ... I can see images of Green Tara, say, and though I have a connection there, and even *wish* that I felt more towards her, I don't have anything of the same feeling. It's as if Prajnaparamita is 'plumbed into me' .. and goes right to my core. Like I recognise that she's part of me, no, inseparable from my mind.

Then again, Prajanaparamita is the textual basis of my practice, of Chod, so there's a close connection there, but this feel for her predated my contact with Chod by many years. Of course, that karmic connection was already there, awaiting awakening.

Once again, my orientation is always towards Wisdom, rather than other Enlightened qualities, so it would make sense that Prajnaparamita as a deity would appeal. Yet, there's more to it than that ... as it is fervent devotion and homage that is brought forth ... not intellectual appreciation, or anything more 'cold' or 'dispassionate'.

The more she represents Wisdom, the more she calls forth Devotion from me, it seems.

It reminds me of how in Guru Devotion, one is devoted to the Dharma through the Guru, not really the Guru himself, in his relative conditioned aspect. All this devotion to the Guru, which flows forth from the heart, is, in one sense, channeled towards wisdom, or reality itself .... or realities, perhaps I should say? In the face of what is, one feels Devotion ... why? Because there is a recognition and a yearning ... the recognition of a seed within, yet to come to fruition ... and the yearning for coming home, once that home has been recognised.

Her images seem so close to my innermost heart .. like she is the secret who resides within, who is my ultimate aspect, who is the mirror of both my aspirations and my actual nature.

Blessed Prajnaparamita .... goddess of Wisdom .... I supplicate you with my innermost Heart!

Reflections on Gotsampa - Seven Delights: A Song About Taking Difficult Circumstances to the Path

2006-06-13T08:25:00.004Z

by Tibetan siddha, Götsampa

Namo Ratna Guru !

When thoughts that there is something perceived and a perceiver
Lure my mind away and distract,
I don't close my senses’ gateways to meditate without them
But plunge straight into their essential point.
They're like clouds in the sky; there's this shimmer where they fly;
Thoughts that rise, for me sheer delight!

When kleshas get me going and their heat has got me burning,
I try no antidote to set them right;
Like an alchemistic potion turning metal into gold,
What lies in kleshas’ power to bestow
Is bliss without contagion, completely undefiled;
Kleshas coming up, sheer delight!

When I'm plagued by god-like forces or demonic interference,
I do not drive them out with rites and spells;
The thing to chase away is the egoistic thinking
Built up on the idea of a self.
This will turn those ranks of maras into your own special forces;
When obstacles arise, sheer delight!

When samsara with its anguish has me writhing in its torments,
Instead of wallowing in misery,
I take the greater burden down the greater path to travel
And let compassion set me up
To take upon myself the sufferings of others;
When karmic consequences bloom, delight!

When my body has succumbed to attacks of painful illness,
I do not count on medical relief
But take that very illness as a path and by its power
Remove the obscurations blocking me,
And use it to encourage the qualities worthwhile;
When illness rears its head, sheer delight!

When its time to leave this body, this illusionary tangle,
Don't cause yourself anxiety and grief;
The thing that you should train in and clear up for yourself is—
There's no such thing as dying to be done.
Its just clear light, the mother, and child clear light uniting;
When mind forsakes the body, sheer delight!

When the whole thing's just not working, everything's lined up against you,
Don't try to find some way to change it all;
Here the point to make your practice is reverse the way you see it,
Don't try to make it stop or to improve.
Adverse conditions happen, when they do its so delightful—
They make a little song of sheer delight!

(trans. Jim Scott/Anne Buchardi, Aug. 2, 1996, Karme Chöling, Barnet, Vermont.)

I came across this the other day .. what a delight! Taking everything onto the path ... nothing is outside of the path, nothing is essentially problematic .... all is the path, all is mind, all is same taste ....

Reflections on Saraha, originator of Mahamudra

2006-06-07T06:33:00.002Z

Space is designated as empty,
Yet its exact nature cannot be verbalized.
Similarly the mind is designated as luminously clear,
Yet its exact nature is empty, with no ground for definition.
Thus the self-nature of mind is and has been
From the very beginning like that of space.

Saraha.

... and how blessed I am to have the Mahamudra to practice!

It struck me yesterday how beautifully balanced my two practices are .... that of Chod and of Mahamudra. One involves complex visualisations, the presence of various deities, and the generation of all manner of thoughts and appearances, arranged to induce realisation.

The other involves nothing other than looking at the nature of my mind, directly and simply, with nothing fabricated, nothing altered.

It seems to be an extraordinary balance, to have times practicing Chod where I'm enveloped in sacred presence, invoking and supplicating, where my mind is deliberately directed towards utilising appearances in the most skillful of ways. And then at other times, when practicing Mahamudra, I simply let go of creating or striving in any way, and allow awareness to turn in on itself, and shine its light upon its source. So simple, so pure, so little to get caught up in .... simply allowing the mind to settle into its own nature, and revealing a little of it eternal secret.

What a supreme comfort it is to so readily be surrounded by the blessed ones, to have my guru in mind, and to be filled with radiant qualities, seeming without end. And yet how blessed it is to rest simply in nothing, to let go of doing, and to allow the still waters to settle and show their extraordinary nature, nothing and yet everything.

Either way though, the practice is the same - pointing to minds nature, via direct or indirect means. Either way I'm filled with gratitude, that such treasures should have fallen into my lap, so incomperably precious, yet seemingly so undeserved!

Either way the nature is revealed, that of some (no) thing so intangible, yet seemingly radiant and clear.

Strive as I can, there's nothing I can grasp, no nature to hold as an object or thing, and nothing to say 'I've found it'. It just melts away before my minds eye, insubstantial, groundless, spacious, indeterminate. Nothing to capture, nothing to hold, nothing that is 'it', nothing to be found. Wherever my mind turns, however it tries to sneakily angle itself, it cannot catch anything, cannot find anything, cannot finally encounter this hidden nature as a thing. For all my guile and striving, there's nothing to be found, and in moments of ease, mind lets go of the struggle, and senses the boundless and groundless, finding a strangely profound security in the seemingly insecure.

And yet at one and the same time, this nothing, this no-thing isn't exactly nothing, isn't a void without ... what?, I cannot say. There's seemingly a clarity, a luminosity, a magical display which is unceasing and unimpeded. Mind displays appearances, yet those appearances are empty of substance. And they seem one and the same, well ... not one, yet not two either ..... so intimately connected ... yet not connected, as they are not two things to be brought together in some way.

Inseparable ... Luminous Emptiness ..... where there is one, the other is to be found. Nowhere other than in the one is the other .... nowhere else can they be found. Not separate qualities, not separate and related.

Magical appearances, utterly void of any substance.

Saraha, Master of Mahamudra, who discovered the Golden Key, the direct method .... unquantifiable thanks ....

Shangpa Rinpoche's teachings on Chod

2006-05-22T13:57:00.001Z

How often it's stuck me over the years that I am ultimately blessed to have received the teachings on Chod from Shangpa Rinpoche!

So often I'm at a particular place in my sadhana, and gratitude and joy flood through my mind, realising what an extraordinary thing this is, this Chod of Mahamudra practice. So often I have this sense that what I am doing is echoing down through the ages, with countless beings having practiced this very same profound and so very precious text that I have before me. So often I feel that this echoing comes from beyond time, from beyond anything that makes sense to me, and which seems incomprehensible to the rational mind.

I feel the blessings of this practice, which arises like the sun to illuminate beings with the warmth of its rays, and sense the presence of Rinpoche, guiding me in my practice. Inseparable from any of the great Beings, or of any of the masters who've taught the Chod.

Inseparable from Machig Labdron, who created this Chod ...

.... how can one value something such as this, or repay the debt of gratitude one feels?

Words seem inadequate, somehow, in trying to express this.

Yet it feels like something worthy of attempt ....

How blessed indeed!

Blossoms on the Buddha

2006-05-16T10:55:00.001Z

I was sitting in meditation yesterday on my bench in the garden. A light wind stirred the tree above me, and cherry blossoms gently floated down all around me.

I was reminded of the Buddha, on the night of his Enlightenment, turning the arrows and weapons of Mara into flower petals.

How poignant .....

How blessed .....

How wonderful indeed.

The Three Types of Suffering

2006-05-09T16:23:00.006Z

In the 'Jewel Ornament of Liberation', Gampopa (as do other teachers of orthodox Dharma) asserts that there are three types of suffering, which are:

1 - the suffering of suffering
2 - the suffering of change
3 - all-pervasive suffering

In brief, the suffering of suffering is simply the stuff that really hurts, immediately and directly. So if you cut your finger ... the pain is the suffering of suffering. Or if you get angry, the suffering you feel from that is the same. It can be great sufferings, down to pretty subtle stuff ... but the important thing is that it is directly experienced as unsatisfactoriness.

The suffering of change is the subtle awareness that even though you are feeling good at this particular moment, you know that these conditions cannot last .... and that whatever it is that you are experiencing as pleasurable - well, it cannot last. So in a sense it's a grasping after whatever you are enjoying, aware of it's transience.

The third catagory, the all pervasive suffering is more subtle, and a bit harder to pin down. It is sometimes described as the suffering that comes from simply having the 5 skandhas, i.e, from simply having body and mind. It means that through having a body and mind, there is always a subtle pervading sense of dis-ease in your experience. In a sense, you can't have the six sense organs, and experience sensory input without having this subtle dis-ease. One way to look at it is it's the dis-ease that comes with having a 'you' .. with having a personality. Whatever your personality is ... your current set of 'you', things are always much too fluid and complex to be accommodated by that 'you' .... so there is always this underlying sense of imperfection to experience.

I thought I'd note a couple of points in passing.

Very interestingly, Gampopa goes through these three types of suffering in the reverse order to what I have done. Usually it would seem that people start with the one most people can directly relate to (and agree with), and moves on to the others in order of subtlety. Yet Gampopa reverses this. Does this make it harder for one to understand the all-pervasive suffering without being 'led to it' through the other two?

One thing about these 3 categories is that it makes clear that the experience of samsara, and therefore the spiritual life, is not just about somehow going beyond the direct experience of suffering in the here and now, as the sufferings of samsara are described as being much more subtle than just immediate and direct suffering.

And, more challenging still, Gampopa (and all those who've taught the sufferings of Samsara in this traditional way) asserts that suffering is all-pervasive within samsara. So *all* our experience is suffering, until and right up to the point of Enlightenment itself! That's pretty strong stuff, especially to anyone who gets caught up in any pride in following some 'higher' vehicle, with all the teachings on Buddha nature etc .... and experiencing the bliss of the natural state of mind, etc in Mahamudra and Dzogchen.

So how can this be understood, this samsara is filled with all-pervasive suffering. Well, one aspect of it is that our experience is always unsatisfactory *when compared with* or *relative to* the experience of a Buddha. In other words, it's a relative term, not an absolute term. It means that the way we experience the world is always characterised by a lack of perfection of happiness and satisfaction *compared to* that of the experience of a Buddha.

That seems to me to make sense, and makes sense of Gampopa's description of how those highly realised Bodhisattva's experience more of this all-pervasive suffering when us not very realised beings seem to miss out on experiencing it.

From my own limited experience, when on longer retreats, I've experienced a sense of suffering or dis-ease as being in the nature of my having mind and body .. at least being in the nature of how I currently experience them. At that goes even when I am experiencing bliss in meditation! ... .there's still a sense of something not absolutely perfect, if your awareness is subtle and strong enough to see it.

So one final note .... in a sense, as our practice and awareness develop, then our sense of and awareness of suffering also develops! We become aware of more subtle forms of suffering! And yet we most likely experience less suffering as we go on .. because we grasp less, become attached less, through realising a little of the nature of how things are .... so that suffering doesn't *hurt* so much ... it becomes more of the nature of just movements in mind, waves on the ocean ..... ripples or a play of light in the field of awareness. And so just something of note, something noticed, rather than something to be 'hooked' on .... or impaled on.

Reflections on All is Mind, from Aspiration Prayer of Mahamudra

2006-05-08T11:32:00.003Z

Appearance is mind and emptiness is mind.
Realisation is mind and confusion is mind.
Arising is mind and cessation is mind.
May all doubts about mind be resolved.

from 'The Aspiration Prayer of Mahamudra'
- HH3 Karmapa, Rangjung Dorje

How radically different this view is to how my mind often gravitates .... into seeing solid appearances 'out there', and a solid 'me' in here. When meditation is weak, and the view is weak, then I begin to believe that a real, solid 'I' operates in relation to a 'truly existent' and solid 'external world out there'. It feels like a polarity, a polar relationship, between these twin locii of simply 'given' objects - me and the rest.

Yet when meditation deepens, and the view strengthens, then both these seeming solidities soften and blur, and they appear more like shimmering patterns, fluid and luminous. Along with this goes a loosening of the sense of a singular 'I', and a corresponding easing of attachment and identifying with both these more flickering aspects.

Yet when meditation deepens further, and the view becomes clearer, then even these light and airy polarities begin to evapourate, revealing not so much two less solid polarities, as a single field of display, which reveals aspects we commonly call us or not-us. One field remains, where us or not-us cannot be found. One field where appearances seemingly arise, flicker for awhile, then seemingly fade away. That field 'holds' merely appearances, not knowing in or out, us or not-us, internal or external phenomena.

Looking at that field, no field is found. No unitary phenomena called 'mind' can be found, and so nothing ultimately replaces the dualistic phenomena of me and the world. Just a shimmering of light, and flickering of seeming appearance, and a lack of anything anywhere that can be pinned down, named or owned.

Not that there's nothing there at all, not that value or meaning disappears. But as our view changes from us and not-us to a play of mind, then so follows a lessening of attachment, and a lessoning of suffering which poisons us and our 'mothers' in equal measure.

Oh to realise that view, to stabilise that realisation, to cut short this seemingly endless beguilement with appearances and thoughts!

Momentary experiences hint at what can be, and what lies ahead/within/already there.

May I and all beings lose our entrancement with appearances, and recognise the illusory display of mind!

May our aspiration be strong and unceasing, and our realisation correspondingly clear and stable.

It's All Good !

2006-05-05T06:34:00.002Z

I remember very clearly my new boss at a company telling me (upon my finding out that he was a Buddhist and asking him what practices he does), that he doesn't practice, that he's taking a 'holiday' in this life, and that he'll practice in the next life. It struck me at the time that he was amazingly confident that he'd get the chance to meet with and practice Dharma again. Having come from a Christian upbringing, the notion of rebirth, and of karma, were still 'hot' topics for me, and in those early days I had the 'fervour' of a new convert! I remember my own criticism of him for being complacent, and of wasting this precious opportunity in this life. That would have been fine, but there was quite a bit of self-righteousness in me at that time, and pride too.

I guess looking back I still suspect that he was just rationalising his 'laziness' rather than being confident in a good rebirth, based on the knowledge of his ethical practice. But who knows?

For myself, it always strikes me when you read texts such as 'The Jewel Ornament of Liberation' how clear they are that being born as a Human or a God is a very rare occurance indeed. Gelug texts seem to especially emphasise this. I've yet to read a text which suggests that it's easy to be born human again without much effort in the practice of ethics and meditation.

Yet how often do I get sucked in to 'wordly' activities, and find myself thoroughly engrossed in them, accepting them as solid and real, and finding myself attached to those objects of the senses?

And all the while life ebbs away, the time of my death comes closer, and the time left to practice becomes shorter and shorter!

Underneath, there must be part of me that thinks that Samsara is not too bad, that my rebirth will be ok, and that I've plenty of time left to both indulge myself, *and* to somehow 'catch up' with practice :-)

Sometimes I'm involved in things, and I see them for what they are (at least to a degree anyway) ... and movements of the mind, swirling appearances which move and melt. And I let them lightly pass through, with minimal attachment. Yet other times I'm sucked in, and lose perspective .... believing all these mirages to be 'real' and then just play the game of 'want' and 'not want'.

Gampopa says that those who think it'll all be fine, and that they'll get a good rebirth for sure are simply attached to Samsara's pleasures.

What strikes me about this is two things ... firstly, that it's through being attached to aspects of our existence which 'seem' to be not too unpleasant, we then decide that actually we don't need to make so much effort, as it's not so bad here really! ... and then, secondly, that assuming it's fine, that we'll be reborn as a human or god, well that assumes again that those rebirths are good places in themselves to be, and that aiming for a good rebirth is a worthy use of this life (rather than aiming for Enlightenment in this very lifetime).

Perhaps my favourite aphorism in Dharma (I don't know where it comes from, or which master says it first) ... describes the pleasures of Samsara, and the attachment to them, as being like

licking honey off a razor's edge

How true!

All the time we grasp at pleasures it seems sweet indeed ... but we don't see what that does to us, and how ignorance grasping after seemingly solid objects takes us away from minds nature, and the state of liberation.

Hmm ... just some reflections .... as they come out ....

Waking Up?

2006-05-03T06:19:00.001Z

The most amazing thing about my life .... is that after going to sleep at night .... each morning .... I wake up again!

When I really think about this .... no .... *really* think about this .... how extraordinary that life continues throughout my dullness during sleep, during my unconsciousness .... and somehow I stay alive, somehow my body keeps functioning, somehow my karma doesn't give up supporting this life ...... somehow ..... how? ..... somehow I hang on to this thread of life, this precious opportunity ....

which I then fritter away with petty distractions!

What an act of faith it would be to go to sleep, and to have faith that I will wake up tomorrow!

But it isn't an act of faith .... it's an act of ignorance ... ignorance of Impermanance and Death .... of blocking out how fragile life is, and how precious life is ....

Amazing to wake up each morning ......

Now, if I could only 'wake up' today !

Blogisattva Award Nominations

2006-02-27T15:12:00.001Z

I'd like to just name-check 'Blogmandu', who've kindly nominated Luminous Emptiness in the 'Best Kind and Compassionate Blog' category of their 2005 awards for Buddhist blogging.

Blogisattva awards

The list of nominees is a wonderful resource for Buddhist orientated blogs ... and a great starting point for finding insightful and thoughtful posts .....

best wishes to all involved ... :-)

Shamatha With and Without Objects

2006-02-25T09:04:00.001Z

>dharmaweb.org said...

>Your instruction is very nice (refers
>to previous post ) but
>since I am new to meditation I have
>to focus on something, such as my
>breath or my just below my
>bellybutton. Because if I don't do
>that, my wandering thought is
>uncontrollable. Is this wrong?

Hi there, my apologies for my late replies to these comments - many things have been taking my time and attention of late!

Yes, absolutely - if you are at a stage where having an object of concentration helps you, then focus on it!

Isn't it always the case that what is best is relative to where one is at? Some people find shamatha with an object the best approach for a long time, others find shamatha without an object the best. I suspect that most people find shamatha without an object to the the harder of the two, as it's in a sense the opposite to what we do most of the time in life - which is to draw into and identify with one or other object which arises in our mindstreams. We are so used to 'losing ourselves' in the objects that arise in consciousness that it's perhaps easiest to focus on an object in meditation, rather than on 'no object'. But of course, with practice, either becomes possible.

My previous post referred to my own particular situation - for where I'm at now.

Please do carry on with what works best for you ... and very best wishes to you!

Nothing to Meditate On

2005-10-24T15:59:00.001Z

How hard it can be to leave things are they are!

How hard it can be to not try to do something in meditation, and to not try to have an object. How hard to not contaminate your meditation by trying to find something, to correct something, or to judge it as 'good' or 'bad'.

Sometimes we judge our meditation as bad because we've not meditated much lately, and disturbing thoughts seems to proliferate more than before.

Sometimes we judge our meditation as bad because we get 'lost' in those thoughts, and they sweep us away, rather than seeing them for what they are, just empty appearances seemingly arising.

Sometimes we reject what is, our natural state of mind, and wish to substitute another for it, one that is somehow more pure, or more still, or more realised.

We don't need to meditate on anything, or take anything as an object, or reject or accept anything at all.

Simply allow ourselves to rest in minds nature, without beings swept away by thoughts and appearances that seem to arise .....

How wonderful it is when one just rests in the minds natural state, without trying to make it other than what is.

How wonderful when one just watches the arising of thoughts, not lost in them, but seeing them for what they are.

How wonderful when the mind naturally stills and pacifies, simply through simply looking, without manipulation.

How wonderful to not fabricate, to not seek to bring something about, and to allow to settle and unfold naturally.

How wonderful these Mahamudra instructions, which reveal our natural Mahamudra, our mind-as-it-is ... ordinary mind.

How wonderful indeed, to taste the bliss of meditation, and the same taste of all phenomena.

How fortunate indeed are we who contact these teachings, these teachers, these precious opportunities.

Do we take advantage of this precious congruence of conditions ... which presents itself before us?

The greatest gift, the secret of happiness ... the route to peace for all ....

How wonderful!

Reflections on Machig Labdron - The Material Devil

2005-10-18T06:11:00.005Z

In reply to a question from her son, Gangpa Muksang, as to "what is the meaning of 'devil', Machig Labdron replied:

"That which is called devil is not some actual great big black thing that scares and petrifies whomever sees it. A devil is anything that obstructs the achievement of freedom. ... Most of all, there is no greater devil than this fixation to a self."

Machig teaches that there are three further devils born from the fixation of ego, all of which are to be severed.

The Material Devil

The Material devil is the form that is seen with the eye. Attraction arises in relation to fine form, and the attitude of aversion arises towards bad form. In the same way, good and bad sounds, smells, tastes, and textures occur as the sense objects of the ear, nose, tongue, and body, and produce attraction or aversion. This is called the devil of dualistic grasping. One is attached to the [perceived] real existence of a sense object, and the sense organs get caught in the actual object of [attraction or] aversion. This creates the condition for harming sentient beings and thus becomes the cause of bondage to cyclic existence. For that reason it is called a devil. And it is called a devil because one is caught in the good and bad objects that really exist. Hence, 'material devil'.

Therefore, son, and good or bad thing that one clings to with attachment is a devil. Whatever the case, you must get rid of attachment and clinging. And as for form, the very essence of form is by nature empty. Therefore, son, since that form is by nature without real existence, you should meditate on that natural emptiness without attraction or aversion to form. You cannot stop form from appearing, [but realise that it is] mere appearance without grasping on to its valid existence. By elimating clinging to that mere appearance, you will be liberated from form, noble son. It is the same with sound, smell, taste and texture. Keep this in mind. This is the way of being of the material devil, and this is the way of liberation from that material devil.

Machig Labdron

How easy it is to mistake the mere appearances that arise to the mind as objects which are worthy of attachment and aversion! How easy it is to lose the perspective of their emptiness, and allow those appearances to fill the mind with their seeming solidity, until they take on a life they don't really posses, as solid, full and self-existent 'things'.

When mind rests in its own nature, then all is seen for what it is - as the play of mind, as the natural effervescence of mind, as mere appearances that dance and gyrate, but which lack any substance whatsoever. How easy it is to be seduced by appearance, and allow appearance to seemingly expand and solidify, until your awareness seems to lose its natural openness and expansiveness. And you are lost in the dark turgid solidity of forms, which oppress the mind with their seeming tangibility.

Yet when mind rests in its own nature, those very forms, those very objects which arise to the senses become the cause of realisation to arise. They become the basis on which we can let go and rest in expansive openess, and see the wafer-thin vaneer that is appearances, which merely seem to play across the field of awareness.

We can't stop those appearances from arising, though many try. Realisation isn't to be found in stopping appearances. But appearances naturally subside when mind is allowed to rest in its own nature.

Form is the material devil that seduces the mind into losing its ability to self-recognise, and to rest in itself. From is the material devil which invites awareness to shrink down and ossify, granting existence where there is none, and granting power where power brings difficulty. Not giving illusory existence to the mere play of appearance, the material devil cannot lead one astray. Not becoming entranced by the material devil, we are not led to harm living beings by our attraction and aversion to forms.

When the material devil is seen for what it is, empty appearances, then naturally compassion arises, and our actions are helpful and kind.

When the material devil entrances, then all actions become ego-centric, and along with help goes harm.

Tangible objects entrance, but are merely appearance. Without accepting or rejecting, allow what is to be. Merely as it is, yet wondrous indeed .....

Impermanence and Death

2005-10-13T16:06:00.001Z

It's interesting how the death of those close to us leads to something of a Bardo in consciousness - a space where so much which seems to flow on automatic stops - a place where we are afforded a vantage point from which to view what is, one that is so advantageous to us as Dharma practitioners, and one which is often open all too briefly.

Watching the grief of my beloved wife now that her father has died has been so difficult. My father's death some 6 months back is still fresh in mind. How painful the emotions that run through the mind.

And yet, how wondrous and beautiful the opportunity which opens up to see how things are.

Clearly seeing the emotions which appear to arise - as empty appearances - seemingly solid and real, and yet, actually, ephemeral and elusive. Truly without substance or centre. How easy to hold on to these dances of mind, and take them as real and worthy of attachment.

And yet of course, they are not nothing. They are not entirely non-existent. Our pain does appear to arise. Our feelings do actually seem to come into existence and appear to our minds.

How delicate this balance - this way of seeing things - to see what appears to arise - and value those appearances - and at the same time, to see that none of that has any substanciality, and that they are all like apparitions or illusions.

How easy to fall into one-sided acceptance or rejection of dharmas. To fall into nihilism or eternalism. To fall into only seeing appearances, or only seeing emptiness. To fall into grasping at one or the other side of these dualisms.

The mahamudra is free of extremes, free of nihilism or eternalism. May all that appears to arise in our minds be fuel for development of wisdom and cause the liberation of all suffering sentient beings .....

Impermanence - Azam Ali - Where all is Borrowed

2005-09-29T09:34:00.004Z

In a world where all is borrowed,
and time like elusive dust seems to
just slip through our fingers,

all we really have are these precious moments
where we can make fertile the soil
in the garden of our hearts,
that here love may make its home
and here the mortal seed may flourish.

Only love can free us from the womb of time

for life like a magnificent mysterious cloud holds
its shape and form only long enough for us to blink,

and all our precious memories are but shadows of
time that will drift away like fallen leaves returning
to the emptiness from which they came.

Thus we are, like innocent children flowering
in the garden of souls.

Azam Ali

A Half Empty Cup?

2005-09-19T10:17:00.001Z

Having just had my first real positive breakthrough with my slipped disc, after 7 years of pain, I was reflecting on what different views it is possible to form on the myriad shifting conditions of ones life, and how differently those views must then impact on your life.

I've just had a successful course of physiotherapy, and as a result, now have less pain than for many years, and some means by which I can manage my pain, without resorting to pain killers. That is quite a breakthrough!

However, I've had many rounds of physio in the past, and been referred to various different agencies and different treatments in that time.

So now that this treatment has been effective - primarily because I was referred to someone in the physio department who was a 'specialist' in back treatment, rather than to the other physios, what is my response?

Is it to curse my 'luck' that only now has a solution been found? I could have been referred to *that* physio at any time, but I wasn't. No-one thought to do so, it seems, despite the lack of success of their own treatment.

So you could say that perhaps I could have been without so much pain had things happened differently - had someone thought to pass me on to their colleague.

but they didn't ... and that is cause and effect .... karma ..... and dependent origination.

But what of my view ... my ideas about what is? Should I hang on to what might have been, and wasn't ... and feel regret, or even anger at the missed opportunity, and all the things in life I've missed due to chronic pain?

Or should I just be grateful for what I have now .... that I'm relatively pain free ... and can now do simple things in life again?

How do we form these views? Well, we form views by selecting out of myriad facets those that fit a particular angle, a particular 'take' on things. And we leave out all the aspects that don't fit with that .... reducing something immensely complex and constantly shifting, into something simple, neat, and ultimately, untrue.

And what are the consequences of these views? Is it not the case that once we have a 'view' on things, then we always then disregard all the arisings that don't fit with this .... and just keep picking up on that which seems to ratify our view?

Do we not only selectively pick out what suits us, but also respond feelingly in such a partial way too?

Do we not have a 'mood' which is a result of the 'view' we have?

If we feel we've been hard done by all these years due to settling on a view which says it *should* have been different .. then how will that make us feel?

Or if we simple say ... that's karma, that's dependent origination ... and let go ... and just get on with what is .... without partiality ... then how will we feel?

Falsify what is, come up with a view ... then filter what comes to be .... and get caught up in negative emotions .....

or just stay with what is ... fluid, complex, shifting always .... and spontaneously respond to needs as they arise, without prejudice, without partiality .... and without reactivity ....

hmmm .... do we see life as a glass that is half full, or half empty?

Do we need to see it is exclusively either? Do we need a view of this sort?

Perhaps half-full is a more useful skillful means than half-empty ..... but beyond skillful means and provisional understandings lies what is .... which lies beyond views.

Open, receptive, responsive ....

Unrestricted .....

Allow the heart to open ... and the mind's natural expansiveness to just be ....

Wordly Things are Pitiful

2005-09-15T16:24:00.002Z

Reflecting on how easy it is to get swept up in wanting and not-wanting, based on misunderstanding the impermanent and not-self nature of all things, the activities of this life, and the apparent pleasures that arise in it are seductive and yet illusory.

How true it is that that which we grasp after slips like sand through our fingers, however hard we try to grasp.

How true it seems to be that the more we grasp after that which we think will bring us happiness, the more empty we feel, and the more we feel we need to do more grasping.

How blessed are the moments when we see through this whole game, and the extraordinary unnecessary nature of the way we grope and grasp is seen in clarity of mind, to be the doomed to failure exercise it truly is.

When mind opens into clarity and emptiness, we see at once the spacious unfixedness of all that appears, and recognise the futility of grasping and rejecting that which is mere appearance.

How peaceful the mind is, which doesn’t try to mistakenly solidify that which cannot be solidified.

How beautiful the release when grasping is relinquished!

How wonderful the teachings of the Gurus, who point the path to such unmistaken realisation!

How blessed indeed are we whose path is illuminated by the clarity of their teachings!

How wonderful – Eh Ma Ho!

The words of Jetsun Milarepa, the peerless one, on the futility of grasping at worldly concerns:

Alas, how pitiful are worldly things!
Like precious jade they cherish
Their bodies, yet like ancient trees
They are doomed in the end to fall.
Sometimes bridle your wild thoughts
And pay heed to the Dharma.

Though you gather wealth
As hard as bees collect their honey,
The ills that upon you may fall
Can never be foretold,
Sometimes bridle your wild thoughts
And pay heed to the Dharma.

One may offer to a Lama
Loads of silk for many years;
But when an ill-fortune descends,
Like a fading rainbow
One's faith at once dissolves.
Sometimes bridle your wild thoughts
And pay heed to the Dharma.

Like a pair of mated beasts,
Lovers live together,
But calamity by the wolf's attack
May fall on you at any time.
Sometimes bridle your wild thoughts
And pay heed to the Dharma.

You may cherish your dear son,
Like a hen hatching her egg;
But a falling rock may crush it at any time.
Sometimes bridle your wild thoughts
And pay heed to the Dharma.

A face may be as pretty as a flower,
Yet at any time it can be spoiled by violent hail.
Think at times of how this world
Is sorry, transient and futile.

Though son and mother have affection
For each other, when discords arise,
Like foes they clash and quarrel,
Sometimes towards all sentient beings
You should feel compassion.

Baking in the warm sunlight
May be pleasant and a comfort,
But a storm of woe may rise
And choke you at any time,
Remember sometimes the deprived,
And give alms to those in need.

Oh, dear men and women patrons,
For him who cannot practise Dharma,
All his life will be meaningless,
All his acts wrong-doings!

Useless Stuff?

2005-09-08T15:43:00.001Z

When it really gets down to it, how much of our activity is quite simply 'useless'?

I don't mean that it has no use at all on a mundane level, but that it is so conditioned, so led by instinct or habit, so unconscious or below awareness or choice, or simply so trivial, superficial and transient that one wonders how on earth one gets caught up in so much 'doing'.

How is this stuff so powerful? Has does it exert so much attraction that we are seduced into activity, into wanting or not wanting, into trying to gain, have and sustaining?

In a way, this 'stuff' isn't so seductive or attractive as such. In a way, nothing is inherently more or less attractive as such. In a way, it's just conditioned co-production, it's the sum total of all influences at that moment, of all conditions at that moment, that bring to bear the ability of that 'thing' to transfix us and tranform us, to encourage us to lose our natural abiding, and trade it for ignorance and duality.

But then again, it's not the 'thing' is it? It's our minds, our consciousness, our awareness that counts. It's 'us' inasmuch as their is an 'us', it's 'me', inasmuch as their is a 'me' which gets lost in this duality and illusion of solidity, which chooses or not to dive into the pool of unawareness and transient 'honey on a razors edge' pleasure.

In that moment of awareness, how does it come to be that we either abide in our natural state, we rest in minds natural state, we are Buddha Nature, we recognise Ordinary Mind ... or we get caught up in allowing appearances to well up into apparent solidity, to seem to not be merely alluring illusions, and become hard and whole happenings and things ... which seem inherently worth chasing after/away?

Mind is open, expansive and without centre. Appearances come and go ... seemingly, but do they?

When mind's nature is lost, appearances take on an entirely different nature, or so it seems. They solidify, then become 3D, they become real, and then attract and entrance.

And yet, they don't. They don't solidify. They remain empty.

Whether lost from Original Mind, temporarily, or abiding it its nature, those appearances remain the same ... empty, free of solidity or self, and illusive and like a dream. Their nature never changes. But our perception of them, and their nature appears to change. So much so that we get lost to ourselves, lost to our nature, and chase after those dreams as though our lives depended on it.

Our lives depended on it? Our lives depend on recognising the nature of all this, and helping all beings to the same, doesn't it?

Or does millions of years of evolution on this planet come down to Pop Idol, Home Makeover shows, and an endless procession of passive consumption of what you need to make your life complete entertainment?

In the moment, our awareness, mind ... appearances ... how are they?

In the moment, which road do we take .... to the heart of things, or lost in illusion?

In the moment, what enables us to take that choice, to wisdom, or to ignorance?

In the moment, the whole universe lays before us, where will we go?

In the moment ... in the moment ....

Silence

2005-08-12T15:33:00.001Z

:-)